I've been crying all day

lifeisajourney

and eating ice cream

and reading

and journaling

watching church services on tv

reading blogs about "how to enjoy being single"

This getting to know myself journey is something else.... 

Thanks for listening...

bethsmiles

You don't have to be happy right after ending a relationship. Eating ice-cream and reading sounds like a pretty good day to me though I'm currently listening to my family shout at the TV because the Broncos are playing like shit today.

KeptInStitches

Ice cream and reading is excellent therapy as far as I'm concerned.

I'm knitting a stranded butterfly hat and scarf and coordinating mittens for a friend of mine who decided now was the time to drop in a complicated Christmas commission. Unless these mittens start going better, I'm joining you in ice cream.

CLoGreenEyes

*hugs* It's not easy getting back to the single life, that's for sure. I think I was a tearful, ice cream eating zombie for about two weeks after I broke up with ex-BF, and afterward things got MUCH better. Just because it's the right choice doesn't make it a piece of cake!! Just know that it will feel so much better soon (and probably sooner than you think), but in the meantime tears and chocolate and journaling and general sadness are okay.

I had a shitty morning too - this has been an expensive and exhausting week, and I'm really tired and stressed out over some stuff. But I made plans to spend time with some friends, so that's good. And during the afternoon, my brothers and I helped my dad rake leaves at his house, which was surprisingly fun and therapeutic. (Bonus: it was 55 whole degrees today!) Now I'm planning our Thanksgiving meal and getting ready for The Walking Dead.

ChemFanatic25

Chocolate, dark chocolate does wonders :-) also I suggest if you're looking for hobbies knitting and crocheting is great for distracting the mind. You could make a hat and scarf for your child. *hugs* you are going to do amazing in finding yourself.

phira

You're mourning a loss, so give yourself a break. It's definitely okay to be sad.

WildMagelet

I agree with the chocolate.

Also, when I need to keep my mind busy I like to do Word/Number puzzles or cross-stitch.  They are just stimulating enough to keep my mind interested & busy enough to keep from wondering about without too much stress/work.

Dignity100

I agree with what the others were saying - once you get out of a relationship, everything is not going to magically be fixed or feel all that great; you still have to mourn the loss of the relationship and even the loss of the friendship.  With time, it'll get better.  Ice cream and sitting on the couch reading/watching TV is awesome for now; if you want, start working out as it does help you feel better.

lifeisajourney

The thing that is making it worse is that he is really taking the breakup hard. He keeps calling and texting me trying to get me to see that breaking up was a bad idea, but I know I did the right thing. He's not the one for me and right now i'm not in the emotional place to be the one for anyone. I need to work on me.

peekaboo2011

lifeisajourney said:

The thing that is making it worse is that he is really taking the breakup hard. He keeps calling and texting me trying to get me to see that breaking up was a bad idea, but I know I did the right thing. He's not the one for me and right now i'm not in the emotional place to be the one for anyone. I need to work on me.

If he is calling/texting, block his number.  You need to focus on you, and not on what he wants right now.

Ice cream and reading sounds like an excellent day to me.  I also am a fan of trying to teach myself something new when I need to keep my mind off things.  I sew, so for me it's sometimes a new embroidery stitch, and other times it's a new quilting technique.  I get so focused on making sure that things look good, it keeps me out of "thinking too much" territory.

loves2shop4shoes

I was a HOT MESS after my serious ex and I broke up.  And my "hot mess" phase lasted for about 9 months.  I did everything you shouldn't do.  I obsessed about the relationship.  I continued to hook up with him.  I stopped focusing on the things that were important (school, my friends).  I dated a few complete losers to try to convince myself I was over him.  But eventually I found myself.  And you will too.

It gets better.  I promise.

lacqueredlover

A word of advice - 

Get outside.  Interact with real people.  Make plans with friends/family.  You get a day or two to wallow at home but then, time to get moving again.  You'll feel much better if you're not sitting at home!

Find a new hobby, take a class (If I remember correctly you have a child, find a new activity for the two of you to do together.)  It's a big, fun world out there.  yes, you can be sad and mourn the relationship but do not let it consume you.  Have your moments, but try to keep them at moments, not entire days.

Ollie08

I totally agree with PP. You're allowed to wallow in self pity for a bit, but then it's time to refocus. When my long-time X left, it took me about 2 weeks to get out of the really shitty part. But then I decided to focus on other things, like teaching my youngest how to ride a bike, teaching myself to run, reading books upon books upon books. I spent a LOT of time with my girls. We had a lot of mommy daughter date nights, read books, watched movies. I will tell you that any kind of exercise (even a walk around the block, or a yoga DVD) made me feel SO much better.

speakeasy14

Block any kind of communication he has with you.  Focus your energy on your son, I think you said he was two?  If so, he's at the age where he needs extra attention anyways.

And here are some funny gifs to make you smile:

lunardaydreaming

I agree with all PP. Let yourself feel what you're feeling; you're mourning the end of a relationship. Even if it was the right thing, it's going to hurt. Give yourself a break, don't expect yourself to snap back to happy in an instant. But, try to get yourself moving, while still letting yourself feel what you're feeling.