Not Engaged Yet

New. Waiting.


Just wanted to introduce myself. 25, have been dating my guy for 8.5 years and we own a house together. I am all but salivating for a ring! I do naughty things at work like surf the knot and look at rings haha. Crossing my fingers this comes soon!


Re: New. Waiting.

  • edited November 2014
    Welcome! I'm pretty new here myself. Hang in there. It sounds like you're waiting patiently and are pretty positive about the waiting, so I can imagine you'll be so excited when it finally happens!! Since you two own a home together, have you talked about marriage?
  • Yes, yes we have. And he says 'it will happen when it happens'. I hope that means within the next 6 months or so, that will be a year since we bought the house. He refuses input on any sort ring shopping or anything! He thinks the man should do it all as a surprise, so we'll see. I try not to get too ahead of myself, and keep changing my mind when I look at wedding type stuff anyways hehe.
  • AlPacinaAlPacina Portlandia member
    Sixth Anniversary 1000 Comments 500 Love Its Name Dropper

    Welcome! I'm also really new here. Just so you know, you're allowed to ask for something more specific than "when it happens". I think having an actual timeline conversation will really help you with the waiting process! Especially after being together for so long!

    I saw you writing about your thanksgiving day meal on the other thread. Do you like to cook? Do you have a signature dish?

    What's the last book you read? Movie you watched?

  • Hello and welcome!

    I will agree with PPs.  It seems completely unfair that he would leave you totally in the dark.  You've been together for a while, and it's not unreasonable to say, "Ok, does 'when it happens' mean within the next year, two years, etc.'" 
  • Hi there! Also new. I understand not going "Okay, I need a ring in six weeks, dude," but I'd still be like "Can we maybe shoot for the next year or so?" or something vague, but still a time. I'm personally an impatient person and like having a plan, so aimless thumb-twiddling would KILL me. Then again, maybe he's keeping mum on it because he has a surprise in store. You never know!
  • PowerDocPowerDoc in my head member
    Sixth Anniversary 10 Comments 5 Love Its
    I'm new myself so it's not much coming from me, but I agree the lack of a timeline would drive me nuts. But then again, I'm not the type to sit "hoping" instead of talking. Got any hobbies that your mind off it in the meantime?
  • I guess we were just so focused on the house for so long it kinda pushed any sort of wedding thoughts to the side. Now that we have the house, have settled in its coming back hehe. I'd kind of hinted at 'a year' and he didnt seem opposed, but just doesn't like being pressured, which I'm obviously not tryna to do. He is also very much one to plan a surprise. I hate to think 'oh were going away this weekend, maybe it's time', but I do haha. I just want him to do his thing, and I trust itl be great.

    I do like to cook, I love it, except for the buying of groceries and tidying up! My last nice dish I made was osso buco, which was amazing, but very expensive. I ordered the veal shanks before realizing they were 45$.

    I guess the only hobby I have so far is cooking. I tried my hand at gardening this summer and it failed pretty bad.
    Last book I read was gone girl + the maze runner series, which I loved both! I just joined an online book club, but they seem to read more classical type books, rather than the new 'hot' ones.
  • bethsmilesbethsmiles Denver, CO member
    10000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    I also loved The Maze Runner (Gone Girl not as much). Did you see The Maze Runner movie? I'm waiting for it to come out on DVD to see it but I'm hoping it was well done because I really loved the series!

  • I too am waiting until it comes out on dvd. I also wanna see gone girl
  • Welcome!

    What part of the world are you located?

    Do you bake? 
  • Welcome! I'm pretty new around here myself. As the PPs have mentioned. You guys should definitely begin to talk about a timeline. Just a simple, 'Hey babe I know you said the engagement will happen when it happens, but about how long will that be? 6 months? a year? etc."

  • Welcome! Long time lurker, this is probably me 6th time commenting.

    My boyfriend and I have been together for three years and maybe a month ago he started showing interests by asking what kind of ring I liked, my ring size and that he wants a BIG wedding. I really want to talk to him about a timeline but I don't want to "pressure" him. 

    I pretty much have the wedding planned already though lol so now its just up to him.

    Is there a style ring that you prefer? 
  • 8 years here.  Still no ring.  But we're talking about before Thanksgiving.  Which is two days away!!!


    Daisypath Wedding tickers


    Daisypath Anniversary tickers

  • I live in the chilly Canadian north! Working from home today, so at least I didn't have to go outside haha.

    I don't really bake. I actually have a kitchen aid mixer that I've never used, it just sits so beautiful on my counter hehe.

    For rings, yes, I'm very picky! I don't like round diamonds, but prefer a square shape. Blingy shank, no halo. I also like old cuts which are a bit different. 

    knskaife! That's so soon! I have my fingers crossed for you ;)
  • stefuhkneestefuhknee Spread Love it's the Brooklyn Way member
    100 Comments 100 Love Its Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    Hi @teddygirl9! I'm new too and I swear I could've written the same post. I've been with my S/O  7.5 years and I am frequently making not so subtle hints about that ring. I don't know if I'm lucky that it doesn't freak him out or unlucky that he just seems to find it amusing. Hoping that we won't be waiting much longer! ;)

    Daisypath Anniversary tickers
  • Sending all of you waiting ladies positive vibes, and crossing my fingers! I spent a couple of months about a year before we got engaged hoping hard that it was coming soon, then I let go and BAM there it was. HA!
  • @lunardaydreaming A watched pot never boils? Haha! I get caught up in it every now and then. Now is one of those times <3

    @stefuhknee So similar! My moms boyfriend wanted to go ring shopping a few months ago, so I ended up 'casually' mentioning how he liked this, but I really preferred this and that. IT made a perfect opportunity where it didnt feel too forced but wasn't out of the blue! 
  • PowerDocPowerDoc in my head member
    Sixth Anniversary 10 Comments 5 Love Its
    I'm jealous you're into cooking. I was just watching the Masterchef with kids and I'm over here like, oh I can barely microwave something without destroying it... haha. 
    Do you like marquise or a baguette cut diamond? Those are pretty cool that you don't see too often, but princess is always classic. :)
  • @teddygirl9 why no it doesn't! Ha ha, enjoy being caught up in it :)

    @PowerDoc isn't it amazing what those kids can do!? I'm in to cooking and it really makes me feel terrible LOL!!!! They're great though and they for the most part treat each other with kindness, it's so cute. Unlike the adults on that show usually ha ha
  • PowerDocPowerDoc in my head member
    Sixth Anniversary 10 Comments 5 Love Its
    edited November 2014
    @lunardaydreamingI was floored!! I had always wanted to watch it, just never caught it when it was on, but now I just feel bad about myself!  :P  And yeah I was even impressed with their behavior... even the really competitive-seeming ones are respectful--there's hope for humanity! ;P
  • Oh man, those kids drive me crazy. Perhaps that is more my problem than theirs though haha. I just find em annoying, but VERY talented.
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