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Oregon or Texas?

melodybachmanmelodybachman member
First Comment
in Oregon
Im from Oregon and my Fiance is from Texas. Both our families are quite large and we don't feel comfortable asking them to travel all the way for a wedding. I'm closer to my family than he is so we had originally decided to have it in Oregon, but still I have this feeling that might not be the right choice. We've thought about alternative solutions. We decided to still invite them, but inform them that there is not pressure. We also considered having a get together in Texas after the wedding, but still we're unsure on what to do.
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Re: Oregon or Texas?

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    [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    If you both live in Oregon, I would have the wedding in Oregon. Plus, it's customary for the wedding to be held in the bride's hometown (we are not doing this). If you feel that the family in Texas won't be able to come, I would consider throwing a post-wedding party there to celebrate. Exclude things like first dance, cake cutting, etc, but let them know that you want to celebrate with them too.
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    mustanggooniemustanggoonie
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    edited December 2011
    Agree w/ stephyanders
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    DramaGeekDramaGeek member
    5 Love Its First Comment
    edited December 2011
    My parents were in the same predicament.  Granted, it was 40 years ago, but same thing.  Mom's family was all in Indiana, Mom and Dad lived in Oregon, Dad's family all lived in Oregon.  The got married here and the only relatives of my mom's that attended were my grandparents and aunt and uncles (Mom's siblings).  They honeymooned in Indiana so they could celebrate with Mom's family too and had a second reception there since none of the family could afford to travel here.
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    eospassioneospassion member
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    edited December 2011
    I think the PPs have great ideas! An alternative is posibly have a smallish ceremony perhaps as a destination wedding. So noones family would have home turf.

    But I would have the hometown ceremony even if the shoe was on the other foot and my own family were in another state. Give enough time for them to try and make travel plans too.
    ~All the love you put out will return to you~
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    ewhiteman06ewhiteman06
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    edited December 2011
    My fiance is from california, and granted I realize that is significantly closer than texas, we're having it here because we both live here, i'm much closer to my family and just have more people that i invited (150 compared to fiance's 60, this would have been the same even if we had it in cali)

    That being said, 50 of the 60 from out of state (mostly in california some from indiana, florida and other states) are coming to the wedding. These include not only family but his neighbors (he grew up in the same house with the same neighbors his whole life).

    If people really wanna be there they will be there. Not to mention, Oregon is one of the  least expensive places to get married in the US and yes I'm biased but there are SO many beautiful places to get married in Oregon

    Also, we sent out Save the date postcards at the 10 month mark so people who are coming from out of state could start making travel plans/arrangements etc.
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    mrshanssonmrshansson member
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    edited December 2011
    I'm from Texas & my fiancee is from Sweden, but I've been in Portland for 10 years.  We're getting married here, spending a week in New Orleans and then my parents are hosting a 2nd reception for us in my hometown in East Texas.  Best of all worlds!  I get to have my fancy Portland wedding with mostly friends, then see almost all of my family the next weekend, in a much less formal, less stressful environment.  In Texas, we're just doing cake and punch, followed by a family-only bbq.  I'll get to wear my dress again for a few hours and maybe even catch up with a few very old friends.
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    evabo31evabo31 member
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    edited December 2011
    My family is in Hawaii, Brian's is in Iowa... so we're getting married here. If our families join us, GREAT! If they don't, no biggie. We both love Oregon and have decided that this is where we want to get married and raise a family. -- Besides, I won't lie... the idea of a smaller wedding thrills me to no end. :)

    No matter what decision you make, it'll be the right one be the right one! 
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    Leah&JPLeah&JP
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    edited December 2011
    VEGAS!!
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    RobinlawrenceRobinlawrence
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    edited December 2011
    I am orignally from Oregon and now live in Texas where I met my fiance soon to be husband JULY 30th and we will be getting Married in Portland...It wasn't hard decision at first because I am from Portland but man o man do I regret it...I wish I would have gotten Married in Texas. Why beause this is where I live now. Yes I am from Portland and that is where all my family is but it has been really hard trying to plan from a distance. So my advice is to have it where you LIVE. Plan a congrats party in the state where you don't live...Im telling you first hand from exp this will be the best thing for you...Plus you will want to keep all your sanity for your hubby to be.
    PS. Its nice to know someone else out there is dealing with the Texas/Oregon toss up, LOL

    Good Luck
    R
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