Bridesmaids' Hair

cbus13

My bridesmaids are all having their hair done for my wedding. Since I am not paying for them, I left it up to them whether they wanted to have it professionally done or for them to do it themselves. I was actually surprised when all wanted their hair done professionally. 

I am wearing my hair in an updo with a big braid on the side. I leaving it up to the girls how they would like their hair done. Since I'm not paying, I feel I should not dictate whether they where it up or down and how. That being said, one of my bridesmaids has been choosing styles that look exactly like how I am wearing my hair. Is it okay to ask her to choose something a little different from mine? I don't want to tell her what she can/can't do, but I also don't want her walking down the aisle with the same style as me. 

The same stylist will be doing all our hair. Could I just say something to the stylist about not having the girls hair too similar to mine? Or is that crossing a line?

Maggie0829

HReis13 said:

My bridesmaids are all having their hair done for my wedding. Since I am not paying for them, I left it up to them whether they wanted to have it professionally done or for them to do it themselves. I was actually surprised when all wanted their hair done professionally. 

I am wearing my hair in an updo with a big braid on the side. I leaving it up to the girls how they would like their hair done. Since I'm not paying, I feel I should not dictate whether they where it up or down and how. That being said, one of my bridesmaids has been choosing styles that look exactly like how I am wearing my hair. Is it okay to ask her to choose something a little different from mine? I don't want to tell her what she can/can't do, but I also don't want her walking down the aisle with the same style as me. 

The same stylist will be doing all our hair. Could I just say something to the stylist about not having the girls hair too similar to mine? Or is that crossing a line?

No.  Just because she may have similar style hair to you doesn't mean that people won't know that you are the bride.  And telling the stylist that is crossing the line.  You are basically controlling what the girls can and cannot do to their hair without directly telling them.

Just relax, take a deep breath and drink a glass of wine.  In the end, it is just hair.

lovegood90

IMO it's crossing a line. You're getting married, you're wearing the white dress, who cares what your BMs hair looks like? Just let her wear her hair how she wants. If she's wearing your wedding dress too, then you can say something

sarawifenow

I agree with Maggie. Just let this go.

 

Honestly, I can't even remember what my BMs did with their hair unless I look at my pictures and I just got married in October. That's how much I didn't care about it!

 

Andplusalso, I would put money down that none of my guests would be able to tell you what my BMs did with their hair.

cbus13

Ok thanks, you are right. I guess it is easy to just get caught up in the details and think worst-case scenario. I will just not say anything!

sarawifenow

HReis13 said:

Ok thanks, you are right. I guess it is easy to just get caught up in the details and think worst-case scenario. I will just not say anything!

I completely understand. I will say that I became the happiest durning the wedding planning process when I adopted the mindset of what happens happens. It took a huge weight off of my shoulders.

 

Also what helped a lot was asking myself if I remembered the details I was worrying about at the last wedding I went to. If I couldn't remember what favors the last wedding had, then I shouldn't stress so much.

 

That was just an example and probably more advice than what you were looking for but I hope it helps!

Maggie0829

sarawifenow said:

HReis13 said:

Ok thanks, you are right. I guess it is easy to just get caught up in the details and think worst-case scenario. I will just not say anything!

I completely understand. I will say that I became the happiest durning the wedding planning process when I adopted the mindset of what happens happens. It took a huge weight off of my shoulders.

 

Also what helped a lot was asking myself if I remembered the details I was worrying about at the last wedding I went to. If I couldn't remember what favors the last wedding had, then I shouldn't stress so much.

 

That was just an example and probably more advice than what you were looking for but I hope it helps!

All of this.  Also remember that you can only control yourself and your repsonse to things.  If you let yourself get caught up in details that in the end don't matter you will just stress yourself out.  So only worry about your hair and makeup because at the end of the day all eyes will be on you and your groom, not your BMs hair.

OliveOilsMom

HReis13 said:

Ok thanks, you are right. I guess it is easy to just get caught up in the details and think worst-case scenario. I will just not say anything!

The only thing that you could do would be to show some of the girls the hairdo you have picked out.  The one who wants it styled similarly may realize and change how she does her own hair. But don't single her out or anything like that, let her come to that realization - if she does, on her own.

[Deleted User]

Does BM know that the style she picked out is the same style you picked out? If not, I would just go "Great minds think alike, I picked out the same style too" and leave it at that. She may or may not change the style she picked then. But at least she'll know before the wedding giving her  a chance to change it if she wants, and if she doesn't, no biggie

cbus13

I am pretty sure she knows what my style is like because I showed her pictures after my trial run. But I don't think it has crossed her mind, yet, that the style she is planning on having looks like mine. But I also don't want to make things awkward for her either.