I really want to call someone out on FB.

climbingsingle

I know it's wrong. I know how it makes people look. But I've been fighting the urge since Saturday, and I'm slowly losing my will. 

My BIL's girlfriend is batshit crazy. I posted about her on Snarky brides last week. Her and my MIL are now warring. I know it's not my place, but this woman is posting all these nasty things about my MIL on Facebook. And my MIL is really and truly like my second mother. I love her dearly, and I hate to see this piece of trash treating her like this. I know I can delete her, and I know I can block her. But Jesus, do I just want to call this asshole on her bullshit! 

I'm not going to do it. Again, I know it's not my place. My BIL is really the person that should be telling his girlfriend to stop this nonsense. And I know my husband doesn't want me to get involved. 

ETA: This woman's SIL is also posting threatening things like this:

Who's bugging you mom? Just need a Name and address and all your problems will go away

And girlfriend posted this: Lmao I wish

buttercup1958

That sucks I'm sorry! I know that urge too and its annoying to fight it ha. I did read about her in your post and she is a piece of work. Just remember she is looking like an idiot and showing she has no tact.

AddieCake

How old is this person? What a childish and dumbass thing to do, posting shit about her boyfriend's mother.

abbyj700

AddieCake said:

How old is this person? What a childish and dumbass thing to do, posting shit about her boyfriend's mother.

This. Even if I HATED my MIL I'd never be immature and dumb enough to start a public fued on FB! 

climbingsingle

AddieCake said:

How old is this person? What a childish and dumbass thing to do, posting shit about her boyfriend's mother.

She's in her late 40s. And she's a grandmother. You'd think she'd know better. 

climbingsingle

scribe95 said:

I would probably say something but through a direct message and include BIL on it. You have every right to defend a person you love - MIL or not. If she said something like that right in front of her you would say something right? 

Yes. If she said something in front of me, I would defend my MIL. I'm usually a person that completely avoids any kind of confrontation. But not when someone is treating a family member this way. 

southernbelle0915

That sucks - it's hard to watch people be so nasty (and stupid!) and just sit on the sidelines. Especially when the target is someone you care about. 

I would probably report the threatening post. 

It sounds like she's a drama-seeker. Drama-seekers LOVE it when you reply to shit like this. Probably half the reason they even post shit like that is to rile people up and get attention. She's probably not even that pissed at your MIL. I think by replying or messaging her, you'd be giving her exactly what she wants - drama. Stay silent and let her dig her hole. If you notice it, so does everyone else and you can bet the family's respect for her is withering fast.

lacqueredlover

Ugh I'm sorry.  She sounds super shitty.

But you're right not to engage with her.  Honestly, that's what she's looking for.  People who are drama attention whores on facebook do it so people like you will be like "you know what?  you're an asshole" so then they can start more drama.  I would just delete her so you don't have to see it anymore (and because it takes away the temptation to want to verbally destroy her on there haha.)

AddieCake

What I don't understand is why your BIL is ok with this.

novella1186

scribe95 said:

I would probably say something but through a direct message and include BIL on it. You have every right to defend a person you love - MIL or not. If she said something like that right in front of her you would say something right? 

This! And what the holy fuck? That thing at the bottom of the OP sounds like a death threat to me. That's some psychotic bs. I hope someone is keeping a record of the shit that's being said in case it escalates and needs to be taken to the police as harassment. Cuz really you never know these days, and this chick sounds like a complete C U Next Tuesday. 

climbingsingle

AddieCake said:

What I don't understand is why your BIL is ok with this.

YES. This is also what is driving me crazy. I said this to H last night. Why is his brother OK with his girlfriend treating his mother like this?

It seems like BIL keeps her in his life because she takes care of things for him. It doesn't even seem like he cares about her that much. The whole situation is very strange. 

larrygaga

Unknown

This content has been removed.

carrie0924

I wouldn't confront her directly because that will create more drama. BUT I would be very tempted to passive aggressively start posting things about how much I love my MIL & how kind & thoughtful she is.....The problem with this method is that she will think MIL is treating the two of you differently & will probably give her more reason to dislike MIL. She's crazy. She's digging her own grave. Especially if your BIL sees that you have a good relationship with MIL.

climbingsingle

carrie0924 said:

I wouldn't confront her directly because that will create more drama. BUT I would be very tempted to passive aggressively start posting things about how much I love my MIL & how kind & thoughtful she is.....The problem with this method is that she will think MIL is treating the two of you differently & will probably give her more reason to dislike MIL. She's crazy. She's digging her own grave. Especially if your BIL sees that you have a good relationship with MIL.

I did sort of do that yesterday. MIL is coming to visit this weekend, and I posted a really cute picture on  her page of our dog laying on her bed. I said, "Stella is guarding your bed for you. We're so excited!" I really didn't do it JUST to poke at crazy girlfriend. But she liked it within 30 seconds of me posting it. 

Girlfriend has been dating BIL on and off for over 6 years I think. She and my MIL have always had a tumultous relationship. She actually said to my MIL last week, "I can't wait until Climbing hates you like I do." 

Sugargirl1019

ClimbingBrideNY said:

carrie0924 said:

I wouldn't confront her directly because that will create more drama. BUT I would be very tempted to passive aggressively start posting things about how much I love my MIL & how kind & thoughtful she is.....The problem with this method is that she will think MIL is treating the two of you differently & will probably give her more reason to dislike MIL. She's crazy. She's digging her own grave. Especially if your BIL sees that you have a good relationship with MIL.

I did sort of do that yesterday. MIL is coming to visit this weekend, and I posted a really cute picture on  her page of our dog laying on her bed. I said, "Stella is guarding your bed for you. We're so excited!" I really didn't do it JUST to poke at crazy girlfriend. But she liked it within 30 seconds of me posting it. 

Girlfriend has been dating BIL on and off for over 6 years I think. She and my MIL have always had a tumultous relationship. She actually said to my MIL last week, "I can't wait until Climbing hates you like I do." 

-------------------------------------------------------------

Wuuuuuuut. "Hates you like I do"? And MIL puts up with her?

Kill her (BSC girl) with kindness. I second posting nice things about her.

I don't understand why BIL accepts this. It's one thing yo whine to a friend, but another to publicly whine to everyone in public.

I might say something to BIL. Or I might even message this crazy bitch privately and say it's not appropriate to be complaining about someone publicly on FB, especially where close family can see. It's rude and makes everyone uncomfortable. But I have problems holding myself back from saying things when I probably shouldn't.

novella1186

ClimbingBrideNY said:

carrie0924 said:

I wouldn't confront her directly because that will create more drama. BUT I would be very tempted to passive aggressively start posting things about how much I love my MIL & how kind & thoughtful she is.....The problem with this method is that she will think MIL is treating the two of you differently & will probably give her more reason to dislike MIL. She's crazy. She's digging her own grave. Especially if your BIL sees that you have a good relationship with MIL.

I did sort of do that yesterday. MIL is coming to visit this weekend, and I posted a really cute picture on  her page of our dog laying on her bed. I said, "Stella is guarding your bed for you. We're so excited!" I really didn't do it JUST to poke at crazy girlfriend. But she liked it within 30 seconds of me posting it. 

Girlfriend has been dating BIL on and off for over 6 years I think. She and my MIL have always had a tumultous relationship. She actually said to my MIL last week, "I can't wait until Climbing hates you like I do." 

The first bolded: weird and kind of creepy

The second bolded: WTF? that's just evil and nasty. 

I should introduce her to a mean nasty girl that I know, cuz I'm pretty sure they'll be ending up in the same special circle of hell. 

PrettyGirlLost

buttercup1958 said:

That sucks I'm sorry! I know that urge too and its annoying to fight it ha. I did read about her in your post and she is a piece of work. Just remember she is looking like an idiot and showing she has no tact.

OP's BIL is looking like a huge asshat for letting his GF publicly rant and rave like a fucking child about his own mother.

You guys are all right, he's the one who should tell her to get a fucking grip.

OP, I'd probably just delete and block her ass.  You don't need to get stressed out and tempted by her posts.  Not like she will get a notification that you deleted/blocker her, either.  It will probably take her a while to notice since she is preoccupied by her BF's mother, right?

climbingsingle

PrettyGirlLost said:

buttercup1958 said:

That sucks I'm sorry! I know that urge too and its annoying to fight it ha. I did read about her in your post and she is a piece of work. Just remember she is looking like an idiot and showing she has no tact.

OP's BIL is looking like a huge asshat for letting his GF publicly rant and rave like a fucking child about his own mother.

You guys are all right, he's the one who should tell her to get a fucking grip.

OP, I'd probably just delete and block her ass.  You don't need to get stressed out and tempted by her posts.  Not like she will get a notification that you deleted/blocker her, either.  It will probably take her a while to notice since she is preoccupied by her BF's mother, right?

She's crazy enough that she'd probably notice right away. It's like she stalks me and H. 

Last week, H talked to BIL. My H is also pretty angry at what's been going on. H told him that he needs to get this woman out of his life. She's toxic. Apparently BIL told his girlfriend what my husband said, and she was calling him and leaving him messages. H didn't answer and didn't respond to her. He's so much better at controlling his emotions than I am. I would have answered and told her off. 

novella1186

My cousin's (now ex) wife was a hot mess. Cousin's mother (so my aunt) went to visit cousin's sister (so aunt's other child) in a different state, and posted about it on facebook (that she was having a great time with other child and grandchild). Cousin's hot mess wife commented on the post with some nasty remark about how aunt is just "pretending to be a good mother" and "never bothers to visit" cousin, and just neglects him. Whether this is true or not, and whether there are hurt feelings over it or not, facebook is not the place to hash that out. 

Well, my entire family was up in arms over it, and pretty much ripped cousin's hot mess wife a new one for "publicly airing dirty laundry about the family" and a few of them posted to her facebook wall to publicly shame her over it. The whole thing was a big drama feud for a couple weeks. 

I stayed far far away from the whole mess, but I was kind of glad that she got schooled in how inappropriate it was for her to post shit on social media. And she never did it again. 

So along with what everyone else has said, this bitch's boyfriend (BIL?) needs to set her straight. Like yesterday. Because when other people get involved it blows up to too much drama, but someone's gotta shut a bitch down. 

KatieinBkln

Honestly, the best response to this (besides blocking the asshole) is to reach out to your MIL--tell her you've been watching the shit go down on FB and that you love her and are disgusted with the girlfriend.

Your support will mean much more to your MIL directly delivered, and it has the added benefit of completely bypassing the GF, who is thirsty, thirsty, thirsty.

climbingsingle

KatieinBkln said:

Honestly, the best response to this (besides blocking the asshole) is to reach out to your MIL--tell her you've been watching the shit go down on FB and that you love her and are disgusted with the girlfriend.

Your support will mean much more to your MIL directly delivered, and it has the added benefit of completely bypassing the GF, who is thirsty, thirsty, thirsty.

you're 100% right. MIL and I talked on the phone this weekend and we were discussing it. I told her how angry I was, and that it was so awful that this piece of trash was treating her so awfully. 

PrettyGirlLost

ClimbingBrideNY said:

carrie0924 said:

I wouldn't confront her directly because that will create more drama. BUT I would be very tempted to passive aggressively start posting things about how much I love my MIL & how kind & thoughtful she is.....The problem with this method is that she will think MIL is treating the two of you differently & will probably give her more reason to dislike MIL. She's crazy. She's digging her own grave. Especially if your BIL sees that you have a good relationship with MIL.

I did sort of do that yesterday. MIL is coming to visit this weekend, and I posted a really cute picture on  her page of our dog laying on her bed. I said, "Stella is guarding your bed for you. We're so excited!" I really didn't do it JUST to poke at crazy girlfriend. But she liked it within 30 seconds of me posting it. 

Girlfriend has been dating BIL on and off for over 6 years I think. She and my MIL have always had a tumultous relationship. She actually said to my MIL last week, "I can't wait until Climbing hates you like I do." 

Wow!  See You Next Tuesday, honey!

I'm a direct person.  And once you are married, your ILs *are* your family.  I'd probably very carefully but sternly give my BIL a private, Come to Jesus talk about growing the fuck up and taking care of himself.  Which by extension has the subtext of, Your GF is an asshole!

But, that's just me ;-)

But that's just me.

carrie0924

ClimbingBrideNY said:

PrettyGirlLost said:

buttercup1958 said:

That sucks I'm sorry! I know that urge too and its annoying to fight it ha. I did read about her in your post and she is a piece of work. Just remember she is looking like an idiot and showing she has no tact.

OP's BIL is looking like a huge asshat for letting his GF publicly rant and rave like a fucking child about his own mother.

You guys are all right, he's the one who should tell her to get a fucking grip.

OP, I'd probably just delete and block her ass.  You don't need to get stressed out and tempted by her posts.  Not like she will get a notification that you deleted/blocker her, either.  It will probably take her a while to notice since she is preoccupied by her BF's mother, right?

She's crazy enough that she'd probably notice right away. It's like she stalks me and H. 

Last week, H talked to BIL. My H is also pretty angry at what's been going on. H told him that he needs to get this woman out of his life. She's toxic. Apparently BIL told his girlfriend what my husband said, and she was calling him and leaving him messages. H didn't answer and didn't respond to her. He's so much better at controlling his emotions than I am. I would have answered and told her off. 

This woman is certifiable. Sounds like she and BIL both feed on drama.

beethery

ClimbingBrideNY said:

carrie0924 said:

I wouldn't confront her directly because that will create more drama. BUT I would be very tempted to passive aggressively start posting things about how much I love my MIL & how kind & thoughtful she is.....The problem with this method is that she will think MIL is treating the two of you differently & will probably give her more reason to dislike MIL. She's crazy. She's digging her own grave. Especially if your BIL sees that you have a good relationship with MIL.

I did sort of do that yesterday. MIL is coming to visit this weekend, and I posted a really cute picture on  her page of our dog laying on her bed. I said, "Stella is guarding your bed for you. We're so excited!" I really didn't do it JUST to poke at crazy girlfriend. But she liked it within 30 seconds of me posting it. 

Girlfriend has been dating BIL on and off for over 6 years I think. She and my MIL have always had a tumultous relationship. She actually said to my MIL last week, "I can't wait until Climbing hates you like I do." 

Bitch is fucking crazy and if I ever witnessed her saying something like that I would be unable to stop myself from asking, "What the fuck is wrong with you?"

It's real cute that she tells your MIL that she hates her. That's just... great.

climbingsingle

I've never even met her in person before. They all live in Florida, and she wasn't invited to the wedding (at BIL's request). But we're going to Florida in Feb. I wonder if I'll finally get to meet her. 

Also, can I snark on her for a second? these are what her nails look like. 

climbingsingle

Oh, and these! 

novella1186

Omg. To the nails: eeeeeeeeeeeeeew 

climbingsingle

Right?! I'm going to have to delete the pictures. They give me the icks. 

arrippa

I am sorry but BIL is just as bad as BSC GF. If I was dating someone who was that disrespectful to my mother, I would drop their ass like a hot potato. I am glad to hear that you reached out to MIL about the drama. I can't imagine how bad she must feel.

KatWAG

ClimbingBrideNY said:

Oh, and these! 

those nails do not surprise me in the slightest.