We've fallen on hard times. Please send cheesecakes.

climbingsingle

As some of you know, I work for a large pastry manufacturer. We're wholesale only - we sell to very large grocery chains and distributors. We tend to get a lot of wacky phone calls. When I came in this morning, there was a message on the general voice mail. 

"Hello. I've previously purchased your cheesecakes at Whole Foods. We've recently fallen on hard times, and I was hoping you could send us some free cheesecakes. Here is my address." 

Forget the fact that FedExing cheesecakes is fucking crazy expensive. If you've fallen on hard times, maybe you should be looking into acquiring other items that are not cheesecake? I don't know. 

RebeccaFlower

People will seriously do anything for free food. I remember in college people would stuff their faces while talking about how gross it was, I never understood. It's not like these people didn't have enough to eat in their apartments. 

novella1186

No canned green beans. No milk and eggs. No chicken soup. Cheesecake. Priorities, people. I feel like that message was from the Golden Girls. 

climbingsingle

RebeccaFlower said:

People will seriously do anything for free food. I remember in college people would stuff their faces while talking about how gross it was, I never understood. It's not like these people didn't have enough to eat in their apartments. 

We've also had the another woman call here 3 times trying to get free stuff. We're a small office too, so we all remember her. She's tried using fake names too. Lady, I remember your address in Port Washington! Not gonna happen! 

FutureMrsN3312

I crave cheesecake.  Do I qualify for some free ones to be shipped?!?

If not, I'll have to start a GFM to raise money for said craving...

novella1186

ClimbingBrideNY said:

RebeccaFlower said:

People will seriously do anything for free food. I remember in college people would stuff their faces while talking about how gross it was, I never understood. It's not like these people didn't have enough to eat in their apartments. 

We've also had the another woman call here 3 times trying to get free stuff. We're a small office too, so we all remember her. She's tried using fake names too. Lady, I remember your address in Port Washington! Not gonna happen! 

In high school I was in charge of carry-out for a Mexican restaurant. There was one lady who ordered at least once a week, would come get her food, leave with it, and then call very "upset" because something was wrong with her order. We ALL knew who she was. I recognized her phone number every time she called, and we would all just WAIT for her to call and complain about her food cuz she was always trying to get it for free. It got to the point that the managers would listen to me take her order, I would repeat it back to her, the manager would then repeat it back to her to confirm, the manager would then go to the kitchen to watch it be made, check it again after it was made, and then stand there when the lady came in to get it and check it with her. AND SHE WOULD STILL CALL AND SAY SHIT WAS WRONG AND SHE WANTED IT FOR FREE!!! 

climbingsingle

novella1186 said:

ClimbingBrideNY said:

RebeccaFlower said:

People will seriously do anything for free food. I remember in college people would stuff their faces while talking about how gross it was, I never understood. It's not like these people didn't have enough to eat in their apartments. 

We've also had the another woman call here 3 times trying to get free stuff. We're a small office too, so we all remember her. She's tried using fake names too. Lady, I remember your address in Port Washington! Not gonna happen! 

In high school I was in charge of carry-out for a Mexican restaurant. There was one lady who ordered at least once a week, would come get her food, leave with it, and then call very "upset" because something was wrong with her order. We ALL knew who she was. I recognized her phone number every time she called, and we would all just WAIT for her to call and complain about her food cuz she was always trying to get it for free. It got to the point that the managers would listen to me take her order, I would repeat it back to her, the manager would then repeat it back to her to confirm, the manager would then go to the kitchen to watch it be made, check it again after it was made, and then stand there when the lady came in to get it and check it with her. AND SHE WOULD STILL CALL AND SAY SHIT WAS WRONG AND SHE WANTED IT FOR FREE!!! 

That's so crazy! 

novella1186

ClimbingBrideNY said:

novella1186 said:

ClimbingBrideNY said:

RebeccaFlower said:

People will seriously do anything for free food. I remember in college people would stuff their faces while talking about how gross it was, I never understood. It's not like these people didn't have enough to eat in their apartments. 

We've also had the another woman call here 3 times trying to get free stuff. We're a small office too, so we all remember her. She's tried using fake names too. Lady, I remember your address in Port Washington! Not gonna happen! 

In high school I was in charge of carry-out for a Mexican restaurant. There was one lady who ordered at least once a week, would come get her food, leave with it, and then call very "upset" because something was wrong with her order. We ALL knew who she was. I recognized her phone number every time she called, and we would all just WAIT for her to call and complain about her food cuz she was always trying to get it for free. It got to the point that the managers would listen to me take her order, I would repeat it back to her, the manager would then repeat it back to her to confirm, the manager would then go to the kitchen to watch it be made, check it again after it was made, and then stand there when the lady came in to get it and check it with her. AND SHE WOULD STILL CALL AND SAY SHIT WAS WRONG AND SHE WANTED IT FOR FREE!!! 

That's so crazy! 

Yeah and the most annoying part was that she knew her order had been checked and confirmed multiple times, so she had to use dumber and dumber complaints to try and get it for free. Like "there aren't enough green onions on top, it's ruined!" 

flutteringinfl

novella1186 said:

ClimbingBrideNY said:

RebeccaFlower said:

People will seriously do anything for free food. I remember in college people would stuff their faces while talking about how gross it was, I never understood. It's not like these people didn't have enough to eat in their apartments. 

We've also had the another woman call here 3 times trying to get free stuff. We're a small office too, so we all remember her. She's tried using fake names too. Lady, I remember your address in Port Washington! Not gonna happen! 

In high school I was in charge of carry-out for a Mexican restaurant. There was one lady who ordered at least once a week, would come get her food, leave with it, and then call very "upset" because something was wrong with her order. We ALL knew who she was. I recognized her phone number every time she called, and we would all just WAIT for her to call and complain about her food cuz she was always trying to get it for free. It got to the point that the managers would listen to me take her order, I would repeat it back to her, the manager would then repeat it back to her to confirm, the manager would then go to the kitchen to watch it be made, check it again after it was made, and then stand there when the lady came in to get it and check it with her. AND SHE WOULD STILL CALL AND SAY SHIT WAS WRONG AND SHE WANTED IT FOR FREE!!! 

I went to a going-away party for someone at my last job at a restaurant (the party was at the restaurant; we didn't work there). The girl who was going away brought a friend with her who didn't work with us. The food was great, but later on we found out the employee's friend complained about her food after she ate it so she could get it for free. She actually bragged to our boss that she did this all the time to get free food. Them balls.

blabla89

While you're at it, send some to me, too. My day is off to a really shitty start. Hard times, man, hard times.

lacqueredlover

I can't tell you how many people have contacted me to tell me that they are poor and I should send them nail polish/makeup that I review.  Um, what?  

blabla89

lacqueredlover said:

I can't tell you how many people have contacted me to tell me that they are poor and I should send them nail polish/makeup that I review.  Um, what?  

What do you even say to that???

RebeccaFlower

lacqueredlover said:

I can't tell you how many people have contacted me to tell me that they are poor and I should send them nail polish/makeup that I review.  Um, what?  

I just can't. I don't understand this at all. I can't afford $50 for a nailpolish, I just can't, but that doesn't mean I should bum it off you! Yikes. 

steph861

Amazing. How do people not realize how dumb a request like this sounds?!

ShellD13

Not to thread jack but I was just having this conversation with a coworker last night.  It is AMAZING what people will complain about in restaurants to try to get their meals comp'd.

ShesSoCold

novella1186 said:

ClimbingBrideNY said:

RebeccaFlower said:

People will seriously do anything for free food. I remember in college people would stuff their faces while talking about how gross it was, I never understood. It's not like these people didn't have enough to eat in their apartments. 

We've also had the another woman call here 3 times trying to get free stuff. We're a small office too, so we all remember her. She's tried using fake names too. Lady, I remember your address in Port Washington! Not gonna happen! 

In high school I was in charge of carry-out for a Mexican restaurant. There was one lady who ordered at least once a week, would come get her food, leave with it, and then call very "upset" because something was wrong with her order. We ALL knew who she was. I recognized her phone number every time she called, and we would all just WAIT for her to call and complain about her food cuz she was always trying to get it for free. It got to the point that the managers would listen to me take her order, I would repeat it back to her, the manager would then repeat it back to her to confirm, the manager would then go to the kitchen to watch it be made, check it again after it was made, and then stand there when the lady came in to get it and check it with her. AND SHE WOULD STILL CALL AND SAY SHIT WAS WRONG AND SHE WANTED IT FOR FREE!!! 

I had almost the same shit happen to me at the pizza place I worked at. A family of like 8 would come in on Sunday and order one pizza to go. They would sit and wait for it then leave and call back in 10 minutes that it was wrong and they needed another. After a few weeks of that, they started calling in their order and sending a different kid in to pick it up. We eventually refused their order.

lacqueredlover

blabla89 said:

lacqueredlover said:

I can't tell you how many people have contacted me to tell me that they are poor and I should send them nail polish/makeup that I review.  Um, what?  

What do you even say to that???

Haha at first I would give them advice on how to start a blog.  I had this whole long email I would send about how much time goes into photographing, editing, testing, wear times, etc.  It was kind of hilarious (especially at the beginning when I was buying pretty much everything I reviewed.)  

I had someone recently tell me that they had a family member die so I should sent them my Louboutin nail polish (that for the record I bought, virtually no one works with their PR.)  I told them I was sorry for their loss and a list of stores it was sold in if they wanted retail therapy because I prefer to donate money to charity than to individuals looking for a free nail polish.

novella1186

ShesSoCold said:

novella1186 said:

ClimbingBrideNY said:

RebeccaFlower said:

People will seriously do anything for free food. I remember in college people would stuff their faces while talking about how gross it was, I never understood. It's not like these people didn't have enough to eat in their apartments. 

We've also had the another woman call here 3 times trying to get free stuff. We're a small office too, so we all remember her. She's tried using fake names too. Lady, I remember your address in Port Washington! Not gonna happen! 

In high school I was in charge of carry-out for a Mexican restaurant. There was one lady who ordered at least once a week, would come get her food, leave with it, and then call very "upset" because something was wrong with her order. We ALL knew who she was. I recognized her phone number every time she called, and we would all just WAIT for her to call and complain about her food cuz she was always trying to get it for free. It got to the point that the managers would listen to me take her order, I would repeat it back to her, the manager would then repeat it back to her to confirm, the manager would then go to the kitchen to watch it be made, check it again after it was made, and then stand there when the lady came in to get it and check it with her. AND SHE WOULD STILL CALL AND SAY SHIT WAS WRONG AND SHE WANTED IT FOR FREE!!! 

I had almost the same shit happen to me at the pizza place I worked at. A family of like 8 would come in on Sunday and order one pizza to go. They would sit and wait for it then leave and call back in 10 minutes that it was wrong and they needed another. After a few weeks of that, they started calling in their order and sending a different kid in to pick it up. We eventually refused their order.

Good! It got to the point at our restaurant that when she tried to complain the manager would just say "If your order is always wrong, you should just stop ordering from us. We obviously don't have the ability to please you." She tried to send her daughter in to pull the same scheme, but we knew her phone number and knew it was her daughter so yeah. Didn't work. 

holyguacamole79

My first thought ....

blabla89

novella1186 said:

ClimbingBrideNY said:

RebeccaFlower said:

People will seriously do anything for free food. I remember in college people would stuff their faces while talking about how gross it was, I never understood. It's not like these people didn't have enough to eat in their apartments. 

We've also had the another woman call here 3 times trying to get free stuff. We're a small office too, so we all remember her. She's tried using fake names too. Lady, I remember your address in Port Washington! Not gonna happen! 

In high school I was in charge of carry-out for a Mexican restaurant. There was one lady who ordered at least once a week, would come get her food, leave with it, and then call very "upset" because something was wrong with her order. We ALL knew who she was. I recognized her phone number every time she called, and we would all just WAIT for her to call and complain about her food cuz she was always trying to get it for free. It got to the point that the managers would listen to me take her order, I would repeat it back to her, the manager would then repeat it back to her to confirm, the manager would then go to the kitchen to watch it be made, check it again after it was made, and then stand there when the lady came in to get it and check it with her. AND SHE WOULD STILL CALL AND SAY SHIT WAS WRONG AND SHE WANTED IT FOR FREE!!! 

Ugh those customers. I encountered a few of them when I worked at Steak N Shake.

This one lady ate her entire meal, and her kids ate their meals except for one little piece of chicken that the kid didn't finish. I came to clear the table and she started yelling about how the chicken was undercooked (it wasn't) and the fries were stale (also false), she shouldn't have to pay for any of their food. Really lady? The chicken was undercooked and you could get salmonella so you feed it to your child anyway? WTF is wrong with you? If she sent it back immediately we would have fixed and probably comped part of it, but they ate all their food so of course the manager said hell no.

beethery

I have an art client who legitimately told my contact (I heard him in the background on a call) "Get her this sketch and she'll do it for free. She's got a duty to her country."

Motherfucker, YOU are the one who joined up with the gotdamn chair force, not me. You want it for free? Do it on your own personal time. I am a private citizen and you best believe I'm going to get my money for this shit somehow.

I am doing some pin-up paintings for my contact and one of his bosses. They're paying me for the paintings, and then an extra amount for prints on adhesive-backed vinyl so that they can be put up in the plane. This patch shit though? Naw. I am not doing a fuckin' thing for free.

My friend is working on getting some money out of them, but I'm holding onto the files until then and they aren't seeing shit but HEAVILY watermarked stuff until I get my money. I got bills, bitch.

dcbride86

lacqueredlover said:

blabla89 said:

lacqueredlover said:

I can't tell you how many people have contacted me to tell me that they are poor and I should send them nail polish/makeup that I review.  Um, what?  

What do you even say to that???

Haha at first I would give them advice on how to start a blog.  I had this whole long email I would send about how much time goes into photographing, editing, testing, wear times, etc.  It was kind of hilarious (especially at the beginning when I was buying pretty much everything I reviewed.)  

I had someone recently tell me that they had a family member die so I should sent them my Louboutin nail polish (that for the record I bought, virtually no one works with their PR.)  I told them I was sorry for their loss and a list of stores it was sold in if they wanted retail therapy because I prefer to donate money to charity than to individuals looking for a free nail polish.

How is the Louboutin nail polish?  Also, this is totally random, but what would recommend for someone with brittle nails that tend to peel?  Any specific brand/top coat or anything?

lacqueredlover

dcbride86 said:

lacqueredlover said:

blabla89 said:

lacqueredlover said:

I can't tell you how many people have contacted me to tell me that they are poor and I should send them nail polish/makeup that I review.  Um, what?  

What do you even say to that???

Haha at first I would give them advice on how to start a blog.  I had this whole long email I would send about how much time goes into photographing, editing, testing, wear times, etc.  It was kind of hilarious (especially at the beginning when I was buying pretty much everything I reviewed.)  

I had someone recently tell me that they had a family member die so I should sent them my Louboutin nail polish (that for the record I bought, virtually no one works with their PR.)  I told them I was sorry for their loss and a list of stores it was sold in if they wanted retail therapy because I prefer to donate money to charity than to individuals looking for a free nail polish.

How is the Louboutin nail polish?  Also, this is totally random, but what would recommend for someone with brittle nails that tend to peel?  Any specific brand/top coat or anything?

I have 2 of them, honestly they are awesome.  Are they worth $50?  Absolutely not.  If you're a collector or love the bottle?  go for it!

Try Duri Rejuvacote for a base coat, helps with peeling!

VulgarGirl

If I fall on hard times I'm not contacting the cheesecake company. I'm calling the alcohol distributors.

"Hello, yes, Absolute? I'm poor, please send vodka"

beethery

MagicInk said:

If I fall on hard times I'm not contacting the cheesecake company. I'm calling the alcohol distributors.

"Hello, yes, Absolute? I'm poor, please send vodka"

I'm gonna do this too. Gonna call up P. Diddy and ask for Ciroc. I like this. Good call.

novella1186

blabla89 said:

novella1186 said:

ClimbingBrideNY said:

RebeccaFlower said:

People will seriously do anything for free food. I remember in college people would stuff their faces while talking about how gross it was, I never understood. It's not like these people didn't have enough to eat in their apartments. 

We've also had the another woman call here 3 times trying to get free stuff. We're a small office too, so we all remember her. She's tried using fake names too. Lady, I remember your address in Port Washington! Not gonna happen! 

In high school I was in charge of carry-out for a Mexican restaurant. There was one lady who ordered at least once a week, would come get her food, leave with it, and then call very "upset" because something was wrong with her order. We ALL knew who she was. I recognized her phone number every time she called, and we would all just WAIT for her to call and complain about her food cuz she was always trying to get it for free. It got to the point that the managers would listen to me take her order, I would repeat it back to her, the manager would then repeat it back to her to confirm, the manager would then go to the kitchen to watch it be made, check it again after it was made, and then stand there when the lady came in to get it and check it with her. AND SHE WOULD STILL CALL AND SAY SHIT WAS WRONG AND SHE WANTED IT FOR FREE!!! 

Ugh those customers. I encountered a few of them when I worked at Steak N Shake.

This one lady ate her entire meal, and her kids ate their meals except for one little piece of chicken that the kid didn't finish. I came to clear the table and she started yelling about how the chicken was undercooked (it wasn't) and the fries were stale (also false), she shouldn't have to pay for any of their food. Really lady? The chicken was undercooked and you could get salmonella so you feed it to your child anyway? WTF is wrong with you? If she sent it back immediately we would have fixed and probably comped part of it, but they ate all their food so of course the manager said hell no.

Yeah, I had a friend who waitressed in a diner for years and she would always tell me crap like that! I remember she said a guy came in, ordered a burger, ate the entire thing, then said he wouldn't pay for it because the waitress had touched the bun when she set it on the table. She was like "Um, if someone touching the bun is a problem for you because of germs or something, we gladly would have replaced your meal, but you ate the entire thing, sir." 

novella1186

beethery said:

MagicInk said:

If I fall on hard times I'm not contacting the cheesecake company. I'm calling the alcohol distributors.

"Hello, yes, Absolute? I'm poor, please send vodka"

I'm gonna do this too. Gonna call up P. Diddy and ask for Ciroc. I like this. Good call.

Looking up the phone numbers for Stoli and bacon companies right now... 

levioosa

blabla89 said:

novella1186 said:

ClimbingBrideNY said:

RebeccaFlower said:

People will seriously do anything for free food. I remember in college people would stuff their faces while talking about how gross it was, I never understood. It's not like these people didn't have enough to eat in their apartments. 

We've also had the another woman call here 3 times trying to get free stuff. We're a small office too, so we all remember her. She's tried using fake names too. Lady, I remember your address in Port Washington! Not gonna happen! 

In high school I was in charge of carry-out for a Mexican restaurant. There was one lady who ordered at least once a week, would come get her food, leave with it, and then call very "upset" because something was wrong with her order. We ALL knew who she was. I recognized her phone number every time she called, and we would all just WAIT for her to call and complain about her food cuz she was always trying to get it for free. It got to the point that the managers would listen to me take her order, I would repeat it back to her, the manager would then repeat it back to her to confirm, the manager would then go to the kitchen to watch it be made, check it again after it was made, and then stand there when the lady came in to get it and check it with her. AND SHE WOULD STILL CALL AND SAY SHIT WAS WRONG AND SHE WANTED IT FOR FREE!!! 

Ugh those customers. I encountered a few of them when I worked at Steak N Shake.

This one lady ate her entire meal, and her kids ate their meals except for one little piece of chicken that the kid didn't finish. I came to clear the table and she started yelling about how the chicken was undercooked (it wasn't) and the fries were stale (also false), she shouldn't have to pay for any of their food. Really lady? The chicken was undercooked and you could get salmonella so you feed it to your child anyway? WTF is wrong with you? If she sent it back immediately we would have fixed and probably comped part of it, but they ate all their food so of course the manager said hell no.

That was one of my biggest pet peeves when I used to serve.  Um, you finished your entire meal, but now suddenly there's something horribly wrong with it that I need to comp?  Yeah, you should have tried that two or three bites in.  I checked in with you THREE TIMES to see how you liked your food.

We used to have a manager that wouldn't put up with any bullshit.  One time a customer was yelling at one of our servers that we lied about the ounce size of our steaks.  Our manager came out with the scale, put it on the table and weighed the steak in front of the guy.  I can't say it was the best customer service strategy, but it was hilarious to watch. 

carrie0924

The whole "Customer is always right" mentality goes way too far sometimes.

I've worked in customer service as a server, restaurant manager, fast food restaurant manager, in a women's shape wear company (think Spanx) and currently in a company that specializes in non-lethal personal protection. I have had so many bizarre experiences, I could fill up books upon books. But my all time favorite was when I worked as a manager in fast food, which is the crappiest job I have ever had, far and away. Night before Thanksgiving is CRAZY in fast food, because nobody wants to cook when they are going to spend all day the next day cooking. We were so overwhelmed we were all practically in tears. 10 minute wait times in the drive thru. It was insanity. I was making sandwiches and running the fryers. At some point, the drive thru cashier told me a customer was at the window, angry.
I walk over to the window, and there is a woman standing there, yelling. I had to tell the woman that I could not talk to her with her standing at the window, for her safety. I said I would gladly help, but she had to get in her car and return to the window. She screamed that she had tried to come inside, but we had locked her out. I assured her we hadn't locked her out, that we lock the dining room for safety reasons at the same time every night and dining room hours are posted on the door. Please get back in your car and drive back to the window.
She is enraged, but does so. She tells me her sandwich was wrong. I say to her "Ma'am, I'm the manager, and I personally made your sandwich to our corporate spec. If you would like your sandwich made some other way, you will have to tell me exactly what you want, because otherwise, I am going to re-make your sandwich and it will be exactly what you already have. Because it's made to corporate spec." I told her I wasn't being difficult, I remained calm and polite the entire time, and told her I would get her whatever she wanted, she just needed to tell me what she wanted exactly. She continued to argue with me that it was wrong and she wanted it made right. I told her to tell me exactly what ingredients she wanted, and then made her a custom version of the sandwich. She yelled at me because her onion rings weren't fresh, but again, I had personally dropped those in the fryer and they were perfect. But I told her I would re-make her entire meal. She also demanded her money back. Fine. I'll re-make your entire meal AND give you your money back if you will just leave. Meanwhile, she's been sipping on her milkshake all this time, and got tired of it apparently. She asked me to throw the rest of her milkshake away for her. Well, I can't take trash in through the window. It's a health code violation. I tell her this. I swear to her I'm not making it up or trying to be difficult, that I simply cannot do it, and there's a trashcan that she can drive up to a few feet away. She tries to shove the shake through the open window, so I close the window. She then throws the shake at the window. I open the window, and calmly hand her her money. She tells me "I'm calling corporate!" I tell her "I'm calling the cops!" So as she drives away, I get her license plate number, and call the cops. They went to her house, where she was cozied up with her husband in front of the fire (the police officers told me all of this when they returned), and issued her a ticket for disturbing the peace. I'd have LOVED to see the look on her husband's face when the police show up to his middle class, suburban door and issue his innocent-looking, middle aged white soccer mom of a wife a ticket for disturbing the peace. I wonder how her side of the story went...

levieenrose

I'm sooo tempted to make your title a facebook post. I'll be one year older in about a week, which I think constitutes as falling on hard times. And cake is an approporiate consolation during such hard times. 

KatieinBkln

I mean, in her defense, cheesecake does cure all manner of ills. It is both CHEESE and CAKE, guys!