Bridal Shower, destination wedding, reception invites

msuprincess04

I agree with above. If you are having an AHR, enjoy it. But showers are only for invited guests,even when it's a DW. Why would you want a party that said "Celebrate me, the bride, and my fancy party that you aren't invited to!"

[Deleted User]

Knottie93647369 said:

I'm recently engaged and have a question in somewhat the same vein. My fiance and I have decided to do a DW in Puerto Rico and we're just inviting immediate family and the bridal party. However we are planning on having a large At Home Reception later on when we come home.
Anyway, my mother's best friends who have known me my whole life want to throw me a shower. They know they're not invited to the DW but still want to do it anyway and are super excited about it. Am I supposed to tell them no? And am I supposed to tell them to not invite anyone even if we do plan on having everyone at a big party later? Honestly most of our cousins and whatnot know they're not invited to the DW but have already started asking about a shower and are really excited about that and the At Home Reception. But looking at this board...it looks like I'm supposed to just tell everyone no?

They're not THAT excited.  They're probably happy for you, thrilled even.  But nobody's so super super excited to watch someone open presents for a couple hours.  They might be so happy for you that they'd like to get together with you soon while you're in the glow of bride-dom, but you're not going to rip out their hearts if you tell them you're uncomfortable with them hosting a shower for you.  Let them host a party, you'll totally go, but it shouldn't be a shower in your honor.

flantastic

Holy shit. Was this a newsletter thread back when?

Also what @adk19 said. I understand that mom friends can get excited, but don't overestimate how devastating it would be to tell them no. Do the right thing and say no. They'll get over it more easily than you'd like to think.