Wedding Etiquette Forum

So we got an invite in the mail...

For a wedding on Valentines day. FIs first response is "why do people assume everyone else would love to go to their wedding on valentines day just because they think it's so romantic??" High five FI.

And then it says "Formal Attire. Casual Affair." WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN????
Wedding Countdown Ticker
lyndausviflantasticdcbride86kat1114luckysnorkelMairePoppychibiyuilc07novella1186SP29OliveOilsMomhuskypuppy14FizzySipskaitlynmichelleesstee33PhoneCardLadyholyguacamole79HuckSCwrigleyvilleduhitsdvikinganna87weddingcactusdolewhipper
«1

Re: So we got an invite in the mail...

  • mikenbergermikenberger In a f'n cornfield member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer
    edited December 2014
    So my parents got married on Valentines Day. Then divorced 14 years later. Which meant Valentines Day no longer existed in my life :) its been super handy for FI haha

    ETA: casual/formal are contradictory. No matter how you jazz it.

    image
  • The weird thing is their invitation suite is super nice. I would've actually thought it was going to be a fairly formal event. Until I read that line.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • I think this calls for a tuxedo t-shirt. It's casual and formal all at the same time.

    I like to picture my Jesus in a tuxedo t shirt because it says I want to be formal, but I'm here to party.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    climbingsinglebethsmilescharlieyankee03dolewhipper
  • climbingsingleclimbingsingle NYC 'burbs member
    Eighth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    tcnoble said:



    I think this calls for a tuxedo t-shirt. It's casual and formal all at the same time.




    I like to picture my Jesus in a tuxedo t shirt because it says I want to be formal, but I'm here to party.

    Exactly! (Love that movie)
  • IrishPirate60IrishPirate60 Clare Island member
    Seventh Anniversary 250 Love Its 100 Comments Name Dropper
    One of my brothers got married in a tuxedo t-shirt. I've seen the pictures--I didn't get an invitation.
  • I don't understand why people have weddings on "special" days like Valentines Day. I got invited to a wedding on Christmas once... like no thank you.
  • misshart00misshart00 Oklahoma member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary First Answer
    I actually don't have a problem with the valentines wedding. It's a Saturday that may have been the only day that worked.
    AddieCake
  • I actually don't have a problem with the valentines wedding. It's a Saturday that may have been the only day that worked.
    Agreed. February 14, 2015 is in fact a Saturday. Valentine's Day isn't exactly Christmas or some day you spend with extended family (or have to travel)--it's a day you spend with your S.O., who presumably is also invited to this wedding. I'd feel a bit cheesy having a wedding on Valentine's day, but who cares? 
    AddieCakeLiatris2010japrincess24
  • I don't think I can talk. We're getting married Columbus Day weekend.

    Achievement Unlocked: Survived Your Wedding! 
    HuckSC
  • climbingsingleclimbingsingle NYC 'burbs member
    Eighth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I personally love going to weddings, so I'd actually be happy to attend one on Valentine's Day. 
    huskypuppy14japrincess24
  • pinkcow13pinkcow13 The Concrete Jungle member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    I personally love going to weddings, so I'd actually be happy to attend one on Valentine's Day. 
    Same here. Plus, I am not a fan of Valentine's Day in general. What would annoy me though, is that ridicuous blurb.
                                 Anniversary
    imageimageimage


     

  • AddieCakeAddieCake Beyond the Wall member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    Yeah, I don't get the disgruntledness with a Valentine's Day wedding. Big deal. 
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
    image
  • ObsoleteforceObsoleteforce member
    Fifth Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2014
    I'm getting married on Flag Day!! LOL Although I didn't know it was flag day until half-way through the planning. Hope it doesn't conflict with any of the guests schedules. hahahaha 
    AddieCakekmmssg
  • MegEn1 said:
    I don't think I can talk. We're getting married Columbus Day weekend.
    We got married the same weekend.  It worked in our advantage as several guests were teachers and had a long weekend to travel to our wedding (local for us, but in a popular vacation destination area).  
  • huskypuppy14huskypuppy14 Boston Suburbs member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    I'm getting married on Flag Day!! LOL Although I didn't know it was flag day until half-way through the planning. Hope it doesn't conflict with any of the guests schedules. hahahaha 
    I got married on flag day! It was also the day before Father's day. Our fathers didn't have a problem with the day, so that's all that mattered to us.
    image
    image

    image


  • huskypuppy14huskypuppy14 Boston Suburbs member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    There are so many freaking holidays, that's it's unreasonable to expect someone to avoid all holiday/holiday weekends. I think as long as it's not Christmas or Thanksgiving, I don't care. If I can't go, I can't go. It's not rude to have it on holiday, as long as your VIPs are fine with it.

    Like I said above, I got married on Father's day weekend (and flag day). It was the day the worked for the best for us, our venue, and our VIPs. I don't think anyone didn't come to our wedding because it was that weekend.

    I've been to a wedding on Mother's day, Memorial day weekend, Yom Kippur (these people were not Jewish though), St Patricks day weekend, none of these days bothered me. 
    image
    image

    image


    japrincess24
  • holyguacamole79holyguacamole79 a taco truck in Houston member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    edited December 2014
    We got married on Groundhog Day.
  • I'm getting married on my mother's birthday. It was the best day our venue had available and I almost didn't book it because I was worried about the conflict. But then I called my mother and asked her what she thought and she was DELIGHTED! "This means I get to skip a birthday and be one year younger! Wonderful!"

    Anyway, I don't mind weddings on holidays. Except maybe Christmas or Thanksgiving.

    But the casual/formal thing is just... confusing and not well-thought-out.
    japrincess24
  • I'm getting married on Flag Day!! LOL Although I didn't know it was flag day until half-way through the planning. Hope it doesn't conflict with any of the guests schedules. hahahaha 
    I got married on flag day! It was also the day before Father's day. Our fathers didn't have a problem with the day, so that's all that mattered to us.
    We're getting married on June 20th, which is the day before Father's Day in 2015. I didn't realize this until about a month ago. I also just found out it's my younger cousin's high school graduation day. He and his parents will be missed, but if we changed our date to work with everyone's schedule then we'd never get married. 

    I'd also have no problem attending a wedding on Valentine's Day. Unless it was the special snowflake wedding I attended this past Valentine's Day. Ceremony was in downtown Philly during a snowstorm, reception was SIX HOURS LATER in our hometown 30 minutes away. And that was just the beginning.
    __________________________________________________________________________

    image

    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  •    A wedding on Valentine's day would not bother me. We got married on Columbus day. We didn't realize that's what it was when we booked, it was just the date that worked for us. We did have a very small wedding, however. (under 20 guests)
  • This made me check the national day calendar to see which "holiday" I may be interrupting with our July 25, 2015 wedding. Looks like we are getting married on national hot fudge day, national merry-go-round day, national culinarian's day, national threading the needle day (?), and national dance day. Can't complain about hot fudge and dancing! ;-)

    mollybarker11kaitlynmichellejaprincess24
  • wrigleyvillewrigleyville Chicago member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    edited December 2014
    We never do anything for V-day since we find it so ridiculous and commercialized, so I wouldn't mind going to a wedding. I like weddings. :)

    Plus, if it were super cheesy with lots of V-day stuff - Cupids, hearts, red/pink decor, etc. - I'd get some entertainment out of it. ;)
    misshart00japrincess24
  • I'm getting married on Flag Day!! LOL Although I didn't know it was flag day until half-way through the planning. Hope it doesn't conflict with any of the guests schedules. hahahaha 
    My DD got married last Flag Day.  But then again, what would you expect?  I am retired Army, her husband is a Senior NCO in the Army....of COURSE they were married on the Army's birthday!!!

    I am also friends with a dual Army couple whose son was born on Flag Day.  They also took the "of COURSE he was born on the Army's birthday!  What would you expect?"  Have fun!
    japrincess24
  • tcnobletcnoble member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer
    edited December 2014
    Yeah to be clear I don't have a huge issue with it being on Valentines Day. It only struck me because friends of ours that were invited had spoken to the bride/groom who explicitly stated "isn't it sooo cute our wedding is on Valentines Day?!" No, I don't find it cuter than any other wedding on any other day.

    The formal/casual note is what threw me off. I still don't get it.


    ETA sadly we aren't attending due to finances so I can't inform you all what "Formal Attire. Casual Affair." really means.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • I would be willing to attend a V-Day wedding. Reservations are hard to come by on V-Day and it's hard to decide what to do. There is something slightly ballsy about it though, like, it wouldn't bother me but some people do really go all out for V-Day. Plus, now your anniversary is on V-Day, so extra pressure every year. 

    I agree attire should be tuxedo shirts and mullets. A mullet is business in the front, party in the back. 
    image
    tcnoble
  • Valentine's Day is barely a holiday, so no issue there. It's much better than having a wedding over a 3-day weekend, in my opinion. 

    That Formal Attire/Casual Affair line is ridiculous. I can only imagine that these people don't understand that a formal affair doesn't mean a snooty, stuffy party. Which I interpret to mean that they are not very sophisticated, to be honest. Formal can still be a raging party. Or, as others have mentioned, it's going to be cash bar and cheap food and a bad DJ, and the people will just be dressed up...while waiting in line for crappy bathrooms. 
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards