Wedding Etiquette Forum

FMIL Wants a Dance

I asked FMIL if she had a song in mind for the mother/son dance. She's mentioned the dance more than once, so I knew it was something she had probably put some thought into. She quickly responded with her song choice, but then hit me with this...

She brought up the song she would like to use for her special dance with her husband. I bean dipped around the question and told FI about it later. Is this a thing? I have never heard of this. FI has never heard of it and also thought it would be incredibly uncomfortable. Both of his parents are remarried and neither get along with the other's new spouse. He brought up that if we gave one set of his parents a special dance, we would need to offer his other set of parents a special dance (my father has not remarried/mother not attending).

She seems to have her heart set on doing this dance with her husband, but it was really not something we were planning on doing. Do we let her have her dance? 

Re: FMIL Wants a Dance

  • @Liatris2010‌ has a great suggestion. I would just say, "Sure we will play that song. " No, she doesn't get the dance floor to clear for her.
    SP29fwtx5815[Deleted User]
  • Agree. Have your fiance tell his mother they will play the song and dedicate it to them but that neither of you want multiple spotlight dances.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
  • Along the lines of what Lia mentioned, make sure you tell your DJ that even if FMIL asks, the dance floor is not to be cleared for this song so that FMIL and FSFIL can dance together alone.  
    Jen4948fwtx5815[Deleted User]
  • I agree with PPs about having the dance but not making it a spotlight dance. But if you really want to avoid making anyone uncomfortable with it, it might be best to avoid having the DJ do any dedications after the dances that are spotlight dances.
  • Thank you all.
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