Wedding party attire- different dresses and when to shop

happybridetobe1987

Hi!

I am getting married in July and have one MOH and 3 bms. Our colours are in the purple/green family and I want each girl to wear a different dress. They all have such different styles and body types, and I just want them all to love their dress and feel happy and like themselves.

So my question is, we are going to go shopping to find each girl a dress, places like Club Monaco, Ted Baker, Zara. Since the dress won't have to be 'ordered' like trad'l BM dresses, when do you suggest we first start looking? I don't want to go too early b/c summer/spring styles aren't out yet, but I also don't want anyone to feel rushed if we leave it too late. Suggestions? 

Maggie0829

I would just tell your BMs the color you would like them to wear and length (if that matters to you) and then just let them shop whenever they have time or want to.

I don't really get going as a group since each girl is picking what they want rather then having to come to an agreement on one dress.

happybridetobe1987

Thanks for your input! That's totally fair. I didn't think we'd go out and find each girl a dress in one day, but rather go out as a bonding thing (we are all very close and most of them live in the same city) and start looking. If they find what they like that day, perfect! But if not, I just wanted to get a sense of when we should start looking.

Maggie0829

happybridetobe1987 said:

Thanks for your input! That's totally fair. I didn't think we'd go out and find each girl a dress in one day, but rather go out as a bonding thing (we are all very close and most of them live in the same city) and start looking. If they find what they like that day, perfect! But if not, I just wanted to get a sense of when we should start looking.

If you are all already close then I don't understand the "bonding" thing.  If some of the girls are free and they all want to go shopping together then great.  Just don't push the issue.

And you start looking whenever you want.  Since they don't have to order anything they can even wait until the week of your wedding to buy something.  This is why it is best to just tell them the color and length and let them shop whenever they have a free moment.  Saves you time and some stress from trying to coordinate a shopping trip or two or three.

happybridetobe1987

Lol no one said anything about pushing any issue. They all want to go dress shopping together so I just wanted to know if anyone else has done this kind of dress shopping for their wedding party and when they started looking.

 

And you don't understand why I would want to bond with my best friends/bridesmaids? Because they're an important part of my life and we like spending time together, and this is a fun way to do it. Sorry I'm just confused. It was just a timing question... you seem so negative about my entire post.

flantastic

happybridetobe1987 said:

Lol no one said anything about pushing any issue. They all want to go dress shopping together so I just wanted to know if anyone else has done this kind of dress shopping for their wedding party and when they started looking.

 

And you don't understand why I would want to bond with my best friends/bridesmaids? Because they're an important part of my life and we like spending time together, and this is a fun way to do it. Sorry I'm just confused. It was just a timing question... you seem so negative about my entire post.

Maggie's implying that you're already bonded. If shopping together is something you already do and like, then go for it, but there are friends with whom I am very close with whom I also hate to go shopping. I think she's just worried because many people (brides or bridesmaids) insist on having the shopping "bridal experience" even if it doesn't fit with your personalities.

Maggie0829

flantastic said:

happybridetobe1987 said:

Lol no one said anything about pushing any issue. They all want to go dress shopping together so I just wanted to know if anyone else has done this kind of dress shopping for their wedding party and when they started looking.

 

And you don't understand why I would want to bond with my best friends/bridesmaids? Because they're an important part of my life and we like spending time together, and this is a fun way to do it. Sorry I'm just confused. It was just a timing question... you seem so negative about my entire post.

Maggie's implying that you're already bonded. If shopping together is something you already do and like, then go for it, but there are friends with whom I am very close with whom I also hate to go shopping. I think she's just worried because many people (brides or bridesmaids) insist on having the shopping "bridal experience" even if it doesn't fit with your personalities.

Exactly.

ETA:  And how exactly am I being negative?  I am giving you a blunt answer.  I am sorry not sorry that I am not jumping around squealing because you want to go on a shopping trip with your friends.  What you are asking is not a hard thing to figure out for yourself.  It just seems like you are making a much bigger deal/making things more complicated then is necessary.

happybridetobe1987

wow. just.....wow. you are a very pleasant individual. glad you take so much time to respond to posts just to be what you call blunt, I call rude. if you don't care about "shopping trips with friends" then why are you wasting your time responding? f you don't want to jump around and squee I could give two craps. I don't know you. And if you look at many of the posts on these boards, it's things that people could "figure out themselves". People asking for an opinion on a board about timing for shopping is not an invitation to you to start giving your opinion on why my friends wouldn't want to shop as a group, or anything else I didn't ask you to comment on.

Thanks for all of your help.

Maggie0829

happybridetobe1987 said:

wow. just.....wow. you are a very pleasant individual. glad you take so much time to respond to posts just to be what you call blunt, I call rude. if you don't care about "shopping trips with friends" then why are you wasting your time responding? f you don't want to jump around and squee I could give two craps. I don't know you. And if you look at many of the posts on these boards, it's things that people could "figure out themselves". People asking for an opinion on a board about timing for shopping is not an invitation to you to start giving your opinion on why my friends wouldn't want to shop as a group, or anything else I didn't ask you to comment on.

Thanks for all of your help.

southernbelle0915

If you're not going the traditional bridal shop route where stuff has to be ordered months in advance, you can really start looking at any time. I wouldn't go any later than May just to give yourselves some time and not to feel rushed.

My BMs ordered from the Ann Taylor BM collection. It took less than 2 weeks to get the dresses. We just waited for a sale and ordered then. I 

happybridetobe1987

Thank you @southernbelle0915! That is very helpful. Ann Taylor is one of my favourite stores so I'm definitely thinking to see what they have

southernbelle0915

happybridetobe1987 said:

Thank you @southernbelle0915! That is very helpful. Ann Taylor is one of my favourite stores so I'm definitely thinking to see what they have

If you do this, sign up to get their emails. They have 40% off sales regularly. As soon as I got an email with a coupon code, I forwarded to my BMs so they could save a bunch. 

Just make sure if you pick something out for them that you know their budget ahead of time so you don't go over it.

Lauderdale Pink

happybridetobe1987 said:

Thank you @southernbelle0915! That is very helpful. Ann Taylor is one of my favourite stores so I'm definitely thinking to see what they have

So if you like Ann Taylor check out J. Crew as well, very cool bridal party items.  As for when to shop, I would do it as close to the start of the season as you can to avoid missing out on a great dress.

[Deleted User]

My wedding is in July and I went around the middle of November to look for bridesmaids' dresses.   All of my bridesmaid did attend; however, I didn't make it mandatory.  I basically called each one of them up and said, "Hey, I'm going to be in town (I live out of state) and I was thinking about going to look at BM dresses.  If you want to come and try some on, you're more than welcome."    Everyone took the offer. 

I would suggest giving them a little bit more direction in terms style, fabric and length.   If you just give them a color and tell them to pick whatever, you might have an interesting arrangement of dresses.  I like everyone else's suggestions about J-Crew (although, their BM collection is rather pricey) and Ann Taylor.