The lost art of the Thank You Note

WinstonsGirl

We did TK's for the wedding/shower.  Actually, I did them all.  DH doesn't believe in TK notes.  He feels they're impersonal and would rather call or thank the person in person.  It doesn't always work well when he sometimes doesn't see his friends for months at a time.  I sent them all notes anyway.  

I don't do them for family gifts (parents), and we were always taught as kids to phone Granny/Great aunts to thank them.  Maybe it was cos I was too young to write something, but our family has always done phone calls instead of notes.  Granny is gong blind now, so she wouldn't want a note anyway anymore, but that's a special circumstance.  

danamw

I got a thank you note from my cousin, for the gift I gave her 2 year old, less than a week ago! That is what I call conscientious!

I think Christmas is the only time a thank you note isn't required IF you thanked the giver in person, upon receipt of the gift. If they sent it to you, you send a thank you.

I once had someone flip out, saying thank you notes are not necessary, the main point being "I don't do them!" As if she is the compass society follows.

firebabe6519

Most of my friends lack thank you note etiquette as well. Although in my family you would be in deep shit if you didn't properly thank everyone with a handwritten personalized note for a gift.

WinstonsGirl

Now that I think of it, my neice has to phone people, or tell them thanks in person for gifts or they get taken away.  We brought her stuff back from our trip and she lost it for 3 days before she finally told us thanks.  We've also had her call DH's Mom to thank her for Christmas gifts/Halloween treats, etc.  She's 3 and learning early.  

Kahlyla

A bit of a mixed bag here. Two of husband's cousins didn't send one; three did, one of them about 7 months after the fact (not a photo card). My best friend and his wife didn't send us (or my parents) any for either wedding or baby (grrr), although they did send us a Facebook message re: their cheque wedding present. Same best friend's other bestie (who I'm also friends with) and his new wife had our thank you card to us practically before we got home from the wedding! It was super fast and very sweet.

I remember getting a lovely one from my brother's now-ex very shortly after her baby shower going on nine years ago, and we absolutely sent them after our own wedding and my shower, which was seven/eight years ago. Timeliness was very important to us, too, although a few were staggered due to needing addresses. We mailed cards as gifts arrived and I think the latest one we got out was perhaps two months after the wedding.

hellosweetie1015

I sent handmade thank yous for Christmas when I was a kid since we lived across country from our family. One grandmother has several that are just scribbles on which my mother wrote "thank you" and I "signed" it. (She also has several in which I chose to offer thanks via really terrible poetry.)

Christmas I thank in person now, since we see them. Birthdays are not things my extended family does presents for. High school and college grad got actual thank you notes.

raissyrais

I only received a TK note from my sister for her wedding five years back. Other than that, never got one. I just had my mum post a batch of my TK cards for the people in Mauritius. Have to wait for Saturday so H and I can write and send the rest. I do believe that TK cards are important but you are right there when you say that it's a lost art. What with the virtual life a lot of us live nowadays...we cannot be too surprised.