Weird situation with sort-of volatile hair stylist? Help!

crackktheskyy · January 2015

Edited entire post because way toooo long. I can try to copy paste the original post in a comment.

Long story short, I contacted a hair stylist at my photog's urging about 7 months ago.

We agreed to certain contractual terms and I asked her to send the contract. She changed those terms in the contract, which could have obliged me to as much as $140 more than I initially agreed to pay her. I asked her if this was a mistake and she said no and that it was a busy time of year for her.

I was pissed so I never bothered to reply to her email....you know because I had nothing nice to say to someone who did something underhanded. I probably should have replied, though.

She sent another email 3-4 months later, checking in now that she had more time.

I figured that this was just a shitty business tactic to get my business back because we were spending an awful lot of money with her, so I never bother to reply because I didn't want to be involved.

Tonight I received an email from her asking for more details about the wedding -- what time she should be there, where she should meet us, how many girls, etc.

WTF? I didn't sign a contract with this woman. On what planet is she assuming she's doing our hair? I never replied to any of her e-mails after she very dishonestly tried to insert additional people into the contract. That's my fault and I probably should have, but I was just SO pissed.

I don't want to cause drama between her and my photographer because I was inquiring into her services because of my photog's recommendation.

Do I just email back and say, "Sorry, we never signed a contract because we couldn't seem to agree on the finances"? I'm at a total loss. I have no idea how she thinks she is doing our hair when she never signed a contract.

floridabride44 · January 2015

I think the response you've suggested seems fair and to the point. This lady seems nuts and extremely unprofessional. Maybe this will be a wake up call for her.

Now- random question... Do you plan on writing a review about her with this info? This is the kind of stuff I feel like I would love to see in a review on TK or elsewhere, even though you didn't technically work with her. Reading something like this would make me avoid her like the plague. But I feel like it's not common to write a review unless you actually booked the person. I had bad experiences with some people who I've emailed but never ended up booking, and I'd love to write that in a review but I'm hesitant.

crackktheskyy · January 2015

hsgator said:

I think the response you've suggested seems fair and to the point. This lady seems nuts and extremely unprofessional. Maybe this will be a wake up call for her. Now- random question... Do you plan on writing a review about her with this info? This is the kind of stuff I feel like I would love to see in a review on TK or elsewhere, even though you didn't technically work with her. Reading something like this would make me avoid her like the plague. But I feel like it's not common to write a review unless you actually booked the person. I had bad experiences with some people who I've emailed but never ended up booking, and I'd love to write that in a review but I'm hesitant.

Thanks, it still feels SO awkward to send the e-mail because she apparently has us in her calendar. Considering how bonkers she went at how it is such a crazy time of year for her, I'm just so shocked.

I thought about leaving feedback, but I don't want to cause issues with my photographer...I don't know. The other thing is that I couldn't find her originally anywhere until I realized she worked for a salon. I could only find feedback for the salon. We weren't going through the salon, though.

It seemed unfair to give this sort of feed back to the salon when this was her own personal venture, you know?

The entire situation is just SO freaking weird to me. Like, did she really think after I never replied to her last email about the price being the price that silence meant consent and to hell with the contract?

crackktheskyy · January 2015

My OG post, so it's not like a DD:

TLDR; how do you reply to the e-mail of a crazy hair stylist that has spent the past 7 months apparently under the presumption that you have hired her when you have not?

novella1186 's threads last week, but an issue as come up.

I'm having a totally weird experience with a hair stylist that I had contacted like...6-7 months ago. She was recommended by my really reputable photog so I sort of figured she was good.

When I contacted her originally, she sent over lots of info including a price minimum. At the time, it was unclear how many girls wanted their hair done, but we knew it was somewhere between 7-9 of us. If it was 7, we would have been shy of the spend minimum by $50.

I asked if we could still use her services if I offered to pay the difference to meet the minimum. She said not to worry about it because we were close enough and the clause was really only there for parties of like 2-3 people trying to contract her.

I was like cool thanks and asked for a contract. It took her WEEKS to send a contract and she kept coming up with all sorts of excuses. When the contract came, it listed that 9 people were obligated to have their hair done. WTF-- we agreed to a minimum of 7. So I emailed her thinking it was a mistake and I ask her to resend the contract with a minimum of 7 people

She then replies, saying she doesn't like to do contracts for this reason but that they protect both her and I. She then proceeds to snark that she has already lessened the price (which is not true, she lessened the $800 spend minimum by $50 but it was irrelevant if I'm contractually obligated to pay for two more girls, which would have cost an additional $180....) She then reaffirms, "I have a minimum. That is also a very busy time of year."

... But I offered to meet her minimum. I just wasn't about to overpay by $140. I offered to pay the $50 difference if it came down to it.

I was so annoyed that I spend so long trying to negotiate a simple contract with this lady and she snuck in two extra people that I decided to contract with another company.

I never responded to her snarky e-mail because my mom told me that if I didn't have anything nice to say....don't say it. I probably should have replied but I figured that by not signing the contract, she would get the hint, right?

Fast forward to October (about 4 months after my initial email) and she sends me this:

"Hi crackktheskyy,

How are things going ? Just checking in with you . Please let me know if you need help with anything my busy season is slowing down now."

I thought, WTF? I thought you were so busy that you would be filled up for my date by now. I didn't bother to e-mail back because I figured she was fishing for my business now that she had the time to talk to me, which is a pretty shitty business tactic.

Fast forward to tonight and I receive this:

"Hi crackktheskyy,

I hope this finds you well and that your planning is going smoothly .
I need to get some more details for your wedding ,
What time do you need to be ready by ?
How many people for what services ?
Where is the getting ready location

Thank you and Happy New Year !"

What the ACTUAL fuck? I didn't sign a contract with this woman. On what planet is she assuming she's doing our hair? I never replied to any of her e-mails after she very dishonestly tried to insert additional people into the contract. That's my fault and I probably should have, but I was just SO pissed.

I don't want to cause drama between her and my photographer because I was inquiring into her services because of my photog's recommendation.

Do I just email back and say, "Sorry, we never signed a contract because we couldn't seem to agree on the finances"? I'm at a total loss. I have no idea how she thinks she is doing our hair when she never signed a contract.

Crazy.

huskypuppy14 · January 2015

Just tell her that you hired someone else because the two of you couldn't agree on the contract. You probably should have contacted her after the email in October, to avoid any confusion.

Honestly, I wouldn't worry about your photographer. You don't have to use someone, just because someone else refers them.

crackktheskyy · January 2015

huskypuppy14 said:

Just tell her that you hired someone else because the two of you couldn't agree on the contract. You probably should have contacted her after the email in October, to avoid any confusion.

Honestly, I wouldn't worry about your photographer. You don't have to use someone, just because someone else refers them.

Thanks! I guess I feel so weird about it because this lady just seems SO crazy. You're right, though.

When she e-mailed in October it didn't even strike me that she thought she was doing our hair. Like, it wasn't even on my radar because I had assumed we parted ways. I forwarded it to my mom and she laughed and said, "I guess she couldn't find someone else for the date and wants your business now!"

We didn't even fathom that she had us in the books!

Sugargirl1019 · January 2015

I would reply "we have already booked with someone else" and if you want you can add "I never signed a contract".

hellohkb · January 2015

I would send her a very brief and firm email saying that you could not agree to terms and that you decided to go with another vendor. Definitely pretty weird that she did that with your contract. And yes, just because a vendor refers another vendor it doesn't mean you must use them. Especially if they're pulling sneaky shit like this.

crackktheskyy · January 2015

Sugargirl1019 said:

I would reply "we have already booked with someone else" and if you want you can add "I never signed a contract".

Thanks! Short and sweet is honestly probably best. Good call!

hellohkb said:

I would send her a very brief and firm email saying that you could not agree to terms and that you decided to go with another vendor. Definitely pretty weird that she did that with your contract. And yes, just because a vendor refers another vendor it doesn't mean you must use them. Especially if they're pulling sneaky shit like this.

Thanks, that sounds firm but polite!

I know I don't have to go with her, but I don't want it to cause friction, either. I never know the ins and outs of how businesses recommend each other and I would feel horribly if this crazy person then contacted my photographer and put it on her -- my photographer is a total sweetheart and I would honestly feel terribly. Normally, this wouldn't be a concern but this woman just sounds so batty to me.

I think the way you've phrased it sounds good, though. There's not much else I suppose I can do at this point!

hellohkb · January 2015

Please keep us updated because I'm curious how this situation will turn out.

Also, I'm really guilty of just ignoring vendors I don't want to work with. I promise I won't do it anymore, guys

I just hate sending emails with people in general.

crackktheskyy · January 2015

hellohkb said:

Please keep us updated because I'm curious how this situation will turn out. Also, I'm really guilty of just ignoring vendors I don't want to work with. I promise I won't do it anymore, guys I just hate sending emails with people in general.

I will most definitely post an update when I receive one!

The worst part is that I'm usually so good at at communicating with vendors. I always sent nice e-mails to the vendors we ended up not choosing to say that I appreciated their time and that we decided to go in another direction.

I just never e-mailed her back because I was so furious about how brazenly she changed the price we had agreed upon.

Edited for: words are hard.

hellosweetie1015 · January 2015

Dang. I came in here hoping for something bizarre. Maybe a stylist that accidentally-on-purpose dyed your whole head pink when you asked for caramel highlights.

I'm going away now. *fades into fancy curtain*

theartistformerlyknownas · January 2015

Sounds like another underhanded tactic to guilt you into choosing her by making you think she saved your day. Nobody in their right mind would hold a date without a signed contract, she just didn't get anyone else to fill it so she's going through old emails grasping at straws.

"I'm sorry for the misunderstanding, but the price increase you quoted in your proposed contract on (date) put you outside of my budget. We've gone with another stylist. Thank you for your time."

larrygaga · January 2015

I'm a brat but I would just not respond and see if she shows up! You are not under a contract which means you don't owe her shit. Don't worry about drama between her and your photog, that is their business relationship. Chances are, you aren't the first person she's fucked with.

crackktheskyy · January 2015

lolo883 said:

Sounds like another underhanded tactic to guilt you into choosing her by making you think she saved your day. Nobody in their right mind would hold a date without a signed contract, she just didn't get anyone else to fill it so she's going through old emails grasping at straws. "I'm sorry for the misunderstanding, but the price increase you quoted in your proposed contract on (date) put you outside of my budget. We've gone with another stylist. Thank you for your time."

Thanks, I though it was so weird and I wondered the same (if it was a guilt tactic). I just can't imagine proceeding without a contract!

She was also incredibly disorganized (there's more to the story with her sending repeat emails, taking forever to send the contract, asking multiple times what services we needed, etc.) that I'm wondering if she put it in her book before we signed the contract and simply never took it out!

I emailed her last night and said,

"Hi stylist

Unfortunately, we were never able to agree to the terms of the contract so we went with another vendor.

Warmly,

crackktheskyy"

larrygaga said:

I'm a brat but I would just not respond and see if she shows up! You are not under a contract which means you don't owe her shit. Don't worry about drama between her and your photog, that is their business relationship. Chances are, you aren't the first person she's fucked with.

Ugh, believe me I actually thought about it!

And now that you mention it, I wouldn't be surprised if she goes through this shit a lot. I mean, when I was dress shopping I told my consultant this story and she said, "oh is that (gives name of the stylist)?"

I was like, "YES! How did you know?"

She replied that her BFF is apparently related to the woman and her BFF won't even give any of her friends this woman's information when her friends get married because she is such a nightmare to work with.

At this point, I'm just glad I dodged that bullet.

hellohkb · January 2015

crackktheskyy said:

lolo883 said:

Sounds like another underhanded tactic to guilt you into choosing her by making you think she saved your day. Nobody in their right mind would hold a date without a signed contract, she just didn't get anyone else to fill it so she's going through old emails grasping at straws.

"I'm sorry for the misunderstanding, but the price increase you quoted in your proposed contract on (date) put you outside of my budget. We've gone with another stylist. Thank you for your time."