Is this escort idea dumb?

Junebug2015

Originally, I thought I would just do tented name cards as escort cards, with some creativity in the calligraphy/coloring. But then I saw a picture of champagne glasses as the vehicle, with the guest's name and table number on a straw/toothpick thingy. I like this idea because I can take the money I would have spent on escort cards and cut down on the cost of the champagne toast (woo!).

BUT... is this rude, or tacky, or stupid? Would you be annoyed at having to carry your own glass of champagne to the table? For reference, the picture I'm thinking of is below.

I know there are some logistical issues (like not wanting to have the champagne sitting there too long, or replacing with sparkling cider for young kids, but my venue has a wonderful wedding coordinator who would likely be able to take care of those things). 

KatWAG

If you were going to do a champagne toast anyway and have a wedding coordinator to help with the logistic, then I say go for it. I think its cute.

ShesSoCold

I think it's cute, but I think it might not go over as well. Not that most people cannot control themselves, but what if you have non-drinkers or recovering alcoholics? Some people will already have their own drink in one hand, possibly a card, gift, purse, something else in the other. At almost every wedding I've been to, I grab my husband's or parent's or friend's or someone's escort card because they're sitting at my table and are busy doing something else.

Maybe I'm thinking too far into this. I do think it's cute and while some of the things I listed might be inconvenient, it wouldn't be horrible or tacky or anything. 

AuroraRose41

I agree with @ShesSoCold about keeping in mind any recovering alcoholics, people who can't drink due to health conditions, or any DD's. Also, many venues do a champagne greeting station (ours does and the last wedding I went to had one) separate from the champagne toast, so I would assume that I could drink the champagne right away if they were part of the escort cards. I mention this because I don't know if you really would save money for the toast if everyone already drank the champagne at the cocktail hour. 

I do like the idea too, and did consider it but ultimately decided that I didn't want to single anyone out who couldn't drink alcohol by having their card in a non alcoholic drink while most were in champagne. We have two recovering alcoholics and about five other guests who can't drink due to medications they take though, which is why I decided against it. I think it could be great if all of your guests like to and can drink. 

ETA: I don't like the idea of using sparkling cider that looks like champagne because then parents might get angry thinking that their children were served alcohol before they realize it is non alcoholic or the guests who can't drink may not drink it at all thinking it is alcohol. But I also didn't like the idea of using a non-alcoholic beverage that does not look like champagne because I figured it would single those guests out. 

atlastmrsg

1) Make sure your venue coordinator is okay with doing nit picky little tasks.  Mine was there in case someone couldn't find something (where's the switch to these lights!) and to make sure the place didn't get burned down.  She wasn't there to coordinate who received what glass of champagne.  That's what the DOC I paid for was there for--the details.

2) Those are really little labels.  Might be hard to read or organize.  And, if guests are reaching to get their glass and knocks a few over, what happens then?

3) Fewer people than you think drink.

I think this is Pinterest cute but not real life good.

erika484

I LOVE it but there of course could be issues...I think it depends on your crowd? If you know lots of invitees would drink it then why not!

Junebug2015

Hm, lots of considerations I didn't think of, and ultimately don't want to worry about. Seems like a safer bet to do traditional escort cards to avoid the chance of isolating guests or ending up with a giant spill. Thanks for the input!

jacques27

Seems like you already decided against it (which I agree with all of the PPs about the numerous reasons why it's a logistical nightmare), but since you mentioned wanting to cut down on the cost of the champagne toast, I thought I would pipe up.

Unless the champagne and sparkling cider is included in your open bar cost (if you're having an open bar vs. an otherwise dry wedding), then don't have a champagne toast.  Have a toast, but let people toast with their beverage of choosing. 

Assuming the champagne is extra and you're being charged per bottle opened, you will save yourself some money.  Nearly every champagne toast I have been a part of, I've found that most people will take a glass to festive and participate, take a sip or two, and then about 2/3rds of the glasses end up abandoned somewhere through out the room mostly full.  If you absolutely want champagne and cider, have it available at the bar and if you're having a DJ or someone serving as an MC, have them announce a few minutes prior to the toast that it is upcoming and feel free to toast with the beverage in their hand or go up to the bar to get a glass of champagne or cider if they would like.  You will most likely save a lot of money unless you have a lot of champagne drinkers in your crowd.  I know in my crowd, we'll drink it out of obligation, but we'd rather toast you with a double bourbon on the rocks.

mlg78

I don't know about you but my guests arrived for the cocktail hour at 5pm and toasts didn't happen until about 6:30pm.  How long will you let the champagne sit for?  I would drink the champagne immediately because it'd be disgusting by the time toasts rolled around.

Junebug2015

@mlg78 the champagne would have been poured a few minutes before cocktail hour ended when the guests came into the dining room (my venue has several distinct spaces), so it would be fresh. But who knows what might happen on the day of - maybe someone decides to pour it early. Another point against it.

@jacques27 champagne is not included in my open bar package The main reason I want a champagne toast is because I LOVE champagne, and couldn't be the only one drinking it during the toasts if it's not available to everyone for etiquette reasons. It's still up in the air now because it is a big chunk of money for something many people don't drink.

jacques27

Well, by having it available at the bar, you'd still be etiquette approved and you'd probably spend a third of what you would if you prepoured expecting everyone to partake - assuming you only pay for what is opened.

Barring that, if it's just because you happen to love champagne...

*Are you staying in a hotel after the wedding?  Could you arrange to have a bottle of champagne waiting for you in your hotel room and then have a private toast with your husband?

*Are you doing a first look?  Could you have champagne involved during that?  Obviously, you don't want to be drunk when you walk down the aisle, but you could indulge in a little bit before.

*Are you having a rehearsal dinner?  Could you serve champagne at that instead with fewer people involved?

atlastmrsg

jacques27 said:

Well, by having it available at the bar, you'd still be etiquette approved and you'd probably spend a third of what you would if you prepoured expecting everyone to partake - assuming you only pay for what is opened.

Barring that, if it's just because you happen to love champagne...

*Are you staying in a hotel after the wedding?  Could you arrange to have a bottle of champagne waiting for you in your hotel room and then have a private toast with your husband?

*Are you doing a first look?  Could you have champagne involved during that?  Obviously, you don't want to be drunk when you walk down the aisle, but you could indulge in a little bit before.

*Are you having a rehearsal dinner?  Could you serve champagne at that instead with fewer people involved?

Yes!  I had picnic basket brought to our first look.  It included champagne.  It fit the outdoor wedding and was something to do together for a little bit before ceremony began.

moorewedding530

I agree with @ShesSoCold. My family are drinkers. Not heavy, but people may be a little disappointed if we didn't have a little something. My FILs are not drinkers at all. My FMIL is a former alcoholic, so I was weary about offending her if we had lots of alcohol.

Basically, what we're doing is having beer and wine with heavy horderves, but it will be attended to behind a bar, not in peoples' faces. Plus, no liquor. No biggie.

As far as your escort cards, the idea is adorable, but maybe you could stick them in something else since you aren't into the tented cards? 

Maggie0829

atlastmrsg said:

1) Make sure your venue coordinator is okay with doing nit picky little tasks.  Mine was there in case someone couldn't find something (where's the switch to these lights!) and to make sure the place didn't get burned down.  She wasn't there to coordinate who received what glass of champagne.  That's what the DOC I paid for was there for--the details.

2) Those are really little labels.  Might be hard to read or organize.  And, if guests are reaching to get their glass and knocks a few over, what happens then?

3) Fewer people than you think drink.

I think this is Pinterest cute but not real life good.

This would be my biggest concern.

I would do traditional escort cards and then if you want you can have servers standing at the entrance of the dining area with trays of champagne and those who want a glass can take one prior to going in for dinner.

Junebug2015

Thanks for all the advice everyone! In theory, the idea is really cute but on balance it looks like it won't work out in real life. Even if I could make the flags bigger, I think the balance would be off, plus there are all the other concerns about alienating non-drinkers and executing the idea. The hunt for creative escort cards continues

jacques27 - maybe I can figure out a way to work it in!

Jen4948

Aside from the drinking issues, those labels are small and hard to read. So I'd stick with traditional cards.

climbingsingle

I know you decided against it, but I do think it's a cute idea. 

Knottie13257900

Junebug2015 said:

Thanks for all the advice everyone! In theory, the idea is really cute but on balance it looks like it won't work out in real life. Even if I could make the flags bigger, I think the balance would be off, plus there are all the other concerns about alienating non-drinkers and executing the idea. The hunt for creative escort cards continues

jacques27 - maybe I can figure out a way to work it in!

How about some kind of hors d'oeuvre, especially one that needs a toothpick, and use the same idea? I suppose it could go to waste if not everyone wants to eat that particular thing...but you could make it something innocuous.

[Deleted User]

Cute idea but like pp said, hard to control if you have any underaged guests and for any other guests who don't drink for whatever reason. And for me as a guest, well it's not going to survive long enough for the toast because I'll be drinking it as I go to the table.

Knottie61023985

I love new ideas!  You can do this. Don't include the champagne at the escort table, just empty glasses and pour the champagne at the tables right before the toast! If you are not having wait staff then ask designated people at each table to pour the champagne!  As for being difficult to read...make the flags so they are more readable!

atlastmrsg

Knottie13257900 said:

Junebug2015 said:

Thanks for all the advice everyone! In theory, the idea is really cute but on balance it looks like it won't work out in real life. Even if I could make the flags bigger, I think the balance would be off, plus there are all the other concerns about alienating non-drinkers and executing the idea. The hunt for creative escort cards continues

jacques27 - maybe I can figure out a way to work it in!

How about some kind of hors d'oeuvre, especially one that needs a toothpick, and use the same idea? I suppose it could go to waste if not everyone wants to eat that particular thing...but you could make it something innocuous.

Creative answer, but I would not eat an appetizer that was in a row of people all picking things up.  I don't even like to eat things off fruit/cheese platters that are sitting out.  

And it could be awkward.  Appetizers on napkins?  If on small plates, that will take up a lot of space.

I'd just get a traditional escort card and have lots of champagne at the bar and appetizers being butler-passed.

haleyk620

jacques27 said:

Well, by having it available at the bar, you'd still be etiquette approved and you'd probably spend a third of what you would if you prepoured expecting everyone to partake - assuming you only pay for what is opened.

Barring that, if it's just because you happen to love champagne...

*Are you staying in a hotel after the wedding?  Could you arrange to have a bottle of champagne waiting for you in your hotel room and then have a private toast with your husband?

*Are you doing a first look?  Could you have champagne involved during that?  Obviously, you don't want to be drunk when you walk down the aisle, but you could indulge in a little bit before.

*Are you having a rehearsal dinner?  Could you serve champagne at that instead with fewer people involved?

I love these alternative ideas for champagne toast. Especially the first one; I think it would be great to have a private toast with my husband after we arrive at our hotel for the night!

Knottie091071

I would suggest just using empty champagne glasses with seating placement attached in some way...this way you don't have champagne sitting out, or offending anyone, but people can still use the glass during the cocktail hour/reception, and it can serve as the favor for the night. I think regular plain tented escort cards are a waste of money, since they just get looked at once then thrown away at the end of the night.

Either way you go, your wedding will be fantastic, and won't be made or ruined by the small detail of escort cards!!

MandyMost

I love escort cards that are different than the typical paper. I used votive-sized candle holders with battery-operated tea lights in them, and a sticker and ribbon on them with the name and table numbers. 

This is a cool idea with wine glasses:

Or you could do something like this with any kind of glass (although I'd use a sticker or something instead of the flag)

Or you could do a different kind of "flag"

Oooh, look at these little bottles (my liquor store sells them for $5 each)

This is pretty cute, too, using just paper and ice buckets (could obviously use fake ice).

You can hang a card on the stem of the glass

I can't find a picture, but you can always write directly on the glass as well. 

Or there's about a million ways to use corks!

theartistformerlyknownas

I would not want to have to pick up my own empty glass from the escort card table. I don't understand the need to over-complicate a simple thing that serves a simple purpose. Cards are perfectly fine. 

Junebug2015

I want to do something creative and functional, but I don't want to overthink it. I appreciate the ideas. Maybe the solution is to get a bit more creative with the table decor (I've seen escort cards propped in moss, or flowers) but I don't want to go overboard.

MandyMost

lolo883 said:

I would not want to have to pick up my own empty glass from the escort card table. I don't understand the need to over-complicate a simple thing that serves a simple purpose. Cards are perfectly fine. 

At some weddings you pick up the escort card early and end up carrying it around during cocktail hour. That would definitely be annoying. For my wedding the flow meant you couldn't get your escort card until you headed downstairs from cocktail hour into the reception room (the escort card table was in the reception room), so you literally only had to carry it a max of probably 40 feet to the other side of the room. Yes, those 40 feet could have been a pain in the ass carrying a purse, a drink, and a coat, but I honestly didn't think it would be that much harder than carring a pice of paper, a purse, a drink, and a coat.  Maybe some of my guests were terribly annoyed for that 40-foot walk, but others I know thought it was really cute and took theirs home and still had them when I saw them at Christmas a couple months later. I got a lot of complements. And for me, it was a really cheap and easy way to add extra room decoration, table decorations after people took them, light (they were flameless candles), and a stand-in for a favor (which the moms just couldn't understand weren't necessary). 

jenijoyk

I love creative escort cards. I looked into doing something similar to your original post, but I had a really hard time finding the flags pre-made (so that I could just print on them, fold them over, and call it a day)... and the thought of cutting out a bunch of little flags seemed overwhelming and crazy-making. 

Have you considered tiles? I ended up buying a box of 150 ceramic Mexican tiles on amazon... they ended up being less than $1 each. I stuck little stickies on the back of each so they wouldn't scratch the tables (bought a pack of those felt things you stick on the bottom of furniture... they have them at Home Depot, a few bucks for a pack of 50), then printed the names/table numbers on gift tags from a craft store. Ended up being fairly cheap, matched our Spanish-style venue, and people can use them for spoon rests or coasters. A few people left them behind, but others asked me if they could take those and the extras. I'm sure you could find tiles in a variety of themes/colors/types on amazon, at home depot, or any tile/flooring shop. 

MandyMost

jenijoyk, that is gorgeous! Love the spanish tiles. 

jenijoyk

Thanks! They were relatively easy and cheap and looked so nice on the tables! We still have a stack on our coffee table at home and use them as coasters.

Viczaesar

jenijoyk said:

I love creative escort cards. I looked into doing something similar to your original post, but I had a really hard time finding the flags pre-made (so that I could just print on them, fold them over, and call it a day)... and the thought of cutting out a bunch of little flags seemed overwhelming and crazy-making. 

Have you considered tiles? I ended up buying a box of 150 ceramic Mexican tiles on amazon... they ended up being less than $1 each. I stuck little stickies on the back of each so they wouldn't scratch the tables (bought a pack of those felt things you stick on the bottom of furniture... they have them at Home Depot, a few bucks for a pack of 50), then printed the names/table numbers on gift tags from a craft store. Ended up being fairly cheap, matched our Spanish-style venue, and people can use them for spoon rests or coasters. A few people left them behind, but others asked me if they could take those and the extras. I'm sure you could find tiles in a variety of themes/colors/types on amazon, at home depot, or any tile/flooring shop. 

I love those!  I would have been one of the people asking if I could have any left-behinds.