June 2015 Weddings

Should I ask her to be a bridesmaid?

Okay, so I'm at a crossroads here.  My fiances brother will most definitely be a groomsman, however, I'm not really wanting to ask his girlfriend to be a bridesmaid.  I have no problem with her.  We get along just fine.  We are just not close enough for me to consider her as a bridesmaid.  SOOOOOOO comes the question, should I ask her just to be polite, or should I stick to my guns and keep the ladies that are closest to me?

Re: Should I ask her to be a bridesmaid?

  • Butterflyz419Butterflyz419 member
    100 Love Its 100 Comments First Anniversary Name Dropper
    edited January 2015
    While I understand why people sometimes feel the need to include their FI's sister(s), I can see absolutely no justification for including your FI's brother's girlfriend. I think you're fine as is. I am not including my brother's wife even though I was just a BM for their wedding because we are not actually that close. Too much BM drama possible when you don't choose real friends.

    Edited for important missing word.
  • nope. I wouldn't. You get to choose the BMs and it seems like she is not your choice.
  • My brother (who is a groomsman) is planning in proposing to his gf in a few weeks. My mom asked if I was going to include her in my bridal party and I said no. We are not close (they live on the opposition side of the continent), and (this may sound selfish) it will throw off a lot of the planning we've done.
  • I wouldn't. I regret having my best friend from high school in my wedding. In the seven years since, we haven't talked much at all. She's moved across country, life took us on different journeys. If they break up, she'll forever be in your photos - it's not worth it and don't feel obligated. 
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • No you definitely don't have to ask her. I have a bunch of married/coupled people in my party and their spouses/significant others are not in the party. I do not think that is an expectation. Just be sure to have them at the same table on the seating chart, even if it means having more than 1 wedding party table.
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