Postponement and gifts

borrasca1

My fiancé and I had to postpone our wedding due to an illness in the family. We anticipated being able to reschedule within the month but our father just fell into the hospital again and now it looks like we won't be able to do so for a couple more months. We recieved a couple gifts and I held onto them thinking we were going to reschedule within that month, now I don't know what to do? Everyone knows we are rescheduling but we don't have a date yet. We know we will be able to within no more than 3 months total. Also I assume most people would've returned their gifts by now and would repurchase when we do reschedule but should I also send out a notices even though 30 days has already gone by for those who hadn't sent out their gifts or just put an announcement on our website? Any advice would be appreciated. Thank u

RebeccaFlower

I'm a little confused. First off, I'm sorry for your family health issues. This makes me think most people won't really be thinking about gifts they already sent. Have you already sent thank you notes for these gifts? I hope so. If these are people you're close to, I would probably call and ask if they would like you to return the gifts or hang on to them since you will be getting married soon? 

novella1186

I'm also a bit confused with this. But it's my understanding that you need to return gifts if the wedding is not going to take place. Your wedding is still going to take place, it'll just be a little later. If I were your guest, I wouldn't expect you to return the gift just so I could buy another one in a couple months and give it back to you. 

I'm sorry about your family health issues. I hope things turn out ok. 

levioosa

I'm sorry about your family health issues.

I think that as long as you are fully intending to still have the wedding, you may keep the gifts.  You return gifts when a wedding has been canceled and an engagement broken.  This isn't really the same thing.  You are just moving your date due to an unforseen circumstance. 

borrasca1

I guess I did make it a bit confusing. We fully intend to reschedule the wedding, initially it was going to be within a month and now it seems like it will be more around 4-5 months, since we have to get all our vendors together again and my fiancé's dad needs more healing time.
I received 2 gifts by mail hadn't opened them yet and didn't send them back right away since initially the reschedule was to be within the month. I now don't know if I should return those 2 gifts or just open them and send out the thank you notes? I also need to know if I have to send out another announcement as to the fact the wedding is going to take a little longer to reschedule than originally intended and do I have to let people know how to handle the gifts they bought all though it is beyond the normal 30 day return date? We are both on disability and it is already a big cost having to reschedule and we will have to send out the new invites when we set the new date so I was hoping that I didn't need to send out and pay for more postage another announcement saying its taking longer than expected , can I just put the update on our wedding website? Sorry it's so confusing, I am very confused myself...lol thank u for all the help it is appreciated!

Iamnowmrsjms

As long as you did not give an official rescheduled date initially, IMO there's no need to contact guests again.

Iamnowmrsjms

PS-I'm also sorry about your family health issues and hope your FI's Dad recovers quickly!

WhatawagSBNy

You know all of these people well enough to invite them to your wedding, you know them well enough to call and say, I was going to return every gift, until I thought about some people just paying shipping again in a few months. Would you like me to send it back now or wait. Have FI call his family.

When people get the control to make the choice, the underground rumbling about " what is going on, why don't they have the manners to let me know or return the gift," will disappear. Most will say wait, a few will say return.

But everyone will like you better for consulting them. And keeping those good feelings is what it is all about. I hope things get better soon.