Getting over, not getting your dream venue

Knottie31321366

I finally found a venue that is literally exactly what I pictured and wanted in my head for venue/decoration wise, however the venue prices are about to increase for the year I plan on getting married by over $2000! I'm obviously devastated, and don't know how I'm going to be able to find somewhere that I'll be just as happy with. Any advice?

mikenberger

Knottie31321366 said:

I finally found a venue that is literally exactly what I pictured and wanted in my head for venue/decoration wise, however the venue prices are about to increase for the year I plan on getting married by over $2000! I'm obviously devastated, and don't know how I'm going to be able to find somewhere that I'll be just as happy with. Any advice?

Throw your dream wedding/venue/dress/shoes/hair/suits/flowers/cake/food right out the window. You're setting yourself up for what you are experiencing now: angst over your venue being out of your price range. Find places that are within your budget and see how you might be able to decorate them to fit your perfect style or decoration. 

You said that prices are increasing for the year, I assume 2016? If your venue is that important to you, why not move up the wedding to an available date in 2015?

atlastmrsg

Haven't send out STDs yet?  Which doesn't sound like it...

Push your date back six months.  Save an extra $300-some per month while you wait.  But you have to commit to actually saving that much and putting it away.

Push your date back twelve months.  Save an extra $168 per month while you wait.

Then have wedding at dream venue.

Move up to an off-peak time now--maybe a Friday night if you don't have many traveling guests or a Sunday brunch--when rates are less and venue is available.

I had an 18-month engagement.  Was great.  Gave me time to plan in a leisurely way, have first pick of vendors, and pay for everything.

banana468

I think it's important to take a step back and think about whether the looks make it.

We liked a few venues a bit more for looks but went with one that was going to be better for timing. In the end, it worked out really welL.

Lauderdale Pink

Planning a wedding is hard, all the dreams and details tend to smack right in the face of reality.  Here's the thing, a venue isn't a wedding and a wedding isn't a marriage.  You absolutely have the right to the wedding of your dreams, but you will have to be open minded about some of the details and let your dreams expand a bit.  Take a couple of weeks off from venue hunting, clear your head, enjoy just being engaged, then start the hunt again.

Wishing you all the best.

dcbride86

The day after the wedding, you will look back and it will be your dream wedding.  It won't matter where you got married as soon as its over

Maggie0829

My dream wedding would have taken place on the Eastern Shore over looking the water and outside. I would have been wearing an all lace dress with a v-neck line open back and semi form fitting, carrying a bouquet of yellows and greens.  My real wedding took place at a football stadium in downtown Baltimore with only a few pictures taken outside.  With me wearing a satin gown with no lace anywhere and carrying a bouquet of purples, whites and greens.   Talk about a difference.  The only thing that stayed the same was the color green.

It is okay to have dreams and visions, but you also need to make sure to keep your feet planted firmly in reality.  This may have been your "dream" venue, but you can always make new dreams. 

plainjane0415

I think what you need to remember is that you are marrying the love of your life!  Venues, cakes, favors, decorations, all of that really don't mean a lot when you think of the big picture.  And that is marrying your guy!  I've had to remind myself of this A LOT during planning, because with wedding planning, not everything goes the way it's supposed to, and you really have to have a plan A, a plan B, and a plan C.

I like the advice PP gave about if it really is that important to you, move the wedding up to 2015 to avoid the price jump.  If you simply can't do that, then it may be time to keep searching, and protect your heart

Knottie31321366

Thank you everyone. Very helpful! It's so hard to stay grounded and keep your eye on the prize (my hubby too be, and our future)  Thanks for the reminder!

 

MandyMost

If the venue is really important to you, cut something else. No flowers, a cheaper dress, a sheet cake instead of a tiered cake, skip the favors and the programs, get a simpler invitation, address things yourself, etc. Think about if it will really save you money to go to a cheaper venue, or if you'll end up just spending twice as much on flowers or decorations. 

[Deleted User]

Is it really your dream venue if it's going to cause you to start your marriage in debt?

Junebug2015

atlastmrsg said:

Haven't send out STDs yet?  Which doesn't sound like it...

Push your date back six months.  Save an extra $300-some per month while you wait.  But you have to commit to actually saving that much and putting it away.

Push your date back twelve months.  Save an extra $168 per month while you wait.

Then have wedding at dream venue.

Move up to an off-peak time now--maybe a Friday night if you don't have many traveling guests or a Sunday brunch--when rates are less and venue is available.

I had an 18-month engagement.  Was great.  Gave me time to plan in a leisurely way, have first pick of vendors, and pay for everything.

I totally agree with this. I initially wanted a short engagement, but couldn't make it work because of other family events going on. I hated that I had to wait over a year. Now, I wouldn't change anything (maybe extend the engagement even longer!). Not only did the extra time make planning more fun and less stressful, but FI and I were able to save more and comfortably pay for the wedding we want. Plus, it's sort of fun to be engaged. 

Another thing to consider is that other parts of the wedding, like food and entertainment, will probably contribute a lot more to whether you and your guests enjoy yourself than whether the venue has pretty floors or chairs. Sure, you don't want it to be a dump, but I think it's easier to make compromises in the venue than it is in other areas.

Knottie31321366

This is my issue..

I would love to set a date for June 2017. That way I can take my time, enjoy being engaged, and save up some money for what I would like to afford-without getting into any debt. I am not planning a huge extravagant wedding, and I'm only paying for things I can afford. No line of credit will be taken out or anything..no I do not want to start my marriage in debt!

That being said, the issue is that the venue that I love & can't compare to with anywhere else, their rental fee prices will increase by 2017 by $2000. So possible options are to move the wedding to 2016- if they even have any dates that I would like available- or choose a different location.

This venue does however, include everything "décor" wise that I would like (chandeliers, lounge seating, etc..) So really the only thing I would have to bring in are my flowers & photographers.

I know the options, I know I can try to shed the budget somewhere else to make it up for it, which I'm sure I can try to do...but it's basically like I'm spending my whole wedding budget on this venue, and would not be able to have anything else that I find important on that day too..

 

 

MandyMost

So it's going to cost and extra 2k to do the wedding in 2017 instead of 2016? That's a long way out...are they willing to lock you into that? Everything is likely going to cost a lot more a long way out...prices rise over time, that's the way it works. You don't think you can use that extra year to save 2k?