"A Barber Is Giving Free Haircuts That Make Misbehaving Kids Look Like Old Men"

ashley8918

http://www.buzzfeed.com/rachelzarrell/benjamin-button-special?bftw&bffb&utm_term=4ldqphs#4ldqphs

Have you guys seen this floating around Facebook today, too? What do you think?

I, personally, am PISSED about it. I absolutely hate this trend of public humiliation as punishment. It can be extremely psychologically damaging to a child, and is not at all funny. I feel so bad for kids whose parents think this is an appropriate form of discipline.

Inkdancer

You can't figure out how to appropriately punish your kids, so you embarrass them in front of literally everyone they know. Yeah, great idea. No possible downsides here!

ashley8918

Inkdancer said:

You can't figure out how to appropriately punish your kids, so you embarrass them in front of literally everyone they know. Yeah, great idea. No possible downsides here!

None at all! This is totally healthy and okay.

LadyMillil

I hate this as well. I don't understand public humiliation as punishment. When I misbehaved as a kid I lost privileges. This sort of punishment would have destroyed me. And, seriously to the dad in the article - you aren't happy with your kids' grades so you give him an "old man" haircut? What happened to the parent making sure homework is done before you can do fun stuff? Or hiring a tutor? Or any other valid way to show your kid you are serious about doing well in school that doesn't involve them being mocked by their peers? 

KytchynWitche

Just seems to me like the parents who would actually do this to a kid, would do it because it'll get them shares on Facebook or maybe even TV time. Attention whores everywhere!

ashley8918

LadyMillil said:

I hate this as well. I don't understand public humiliation as punishment. When I misbehaved as a kid I lost privileges. This sort of punishment would have destroyed me. And, seriously to the dad in the article - you aren't happy with your kids' grades so you give him an "old man" haircut? What happened to the parent making sure homework is done before you can do fun stuff? Or hiring a tutor? Or any other valid way to show your kid you are serious about doing well in school that doesn't involve them being mocked by their peers? 

Exactly. I already had self esteem issues as a kid and acted out a lot. If my mom had done this to me, it would have been devastating to what little self esteem I did have.

ashley8918

KytchynWitche said:

Just seems to me like the parents who would actually do this to a kid, would do it because it'll get them shares on Facebook or maybe even TV time. Attention whores everywhere!

I'm sure this is definitely a contributing factor. I can't go a single day without a picture of a kid holding an embarrassing sign, etc. showing up on my news feed.

beethery

It's wildly inappropriate. I totally agree.

And I am a bad person but I laughed so hard. I feel really bad for those kids.

ashley8918

beethery said:

It's wildly inappropriate. I totally agree.

And I am a bad person but I laughed so hard. I feel really bad for those kids.

The haircut itself totally gave me a chuckle. Just like babies who look like senior citizens (Google "struggle babies" for lols). But the actual humiliating of your child? Not funny, bad parents.

beethery

ashley8918 said:

beethery said:

It's wildly inappropriate. I totally agree.

And I am a bad person but I laughed so hard. I feel really bad for those kids.

The haircut itself totally gave me a chuckle. Just like babies who look like senior citizens (Google "struggle babies" for lols). But the actual humiliating of your child? Not funny, bad parents.

Yeah I wouldn't take pictures of it and I wouldn't bring them out of the house like that. I am a bad person but that is just hateful.

jenna8984

My parents tried everything with my brother and he was always getting in trouble. When he was like 16, he had long Kurt Cobain hair. When he got suspended from school, my mom got the clippers and cut it short. It was punishment because it wasn't the way he liked. But I wouldn't call it cruel at all because it was a normal cut, not an embarrassing one.

ashley8918

jenna8984 said:

My parents tried everything with my brother and he was always getting in trouble. When he was like 16, he had long Kurt Cobain hair. When he got suspended from school, my mom got the clippers and cut it short. It was punishment because it wasn't the way he liked. But I wouldn't call it cruel at all because it was a normal cut, not an embarrassing one.

Eh, this is still borderline for me. The way he wore his hair was part of his identity. Trying to strip him of that was pretty fucked up, IMO.

jenna8984

ashley8918 said:

jenna8984 said:

My parents tried everything with my brother and he was always getting in trouble. When he was like 16, he had long Kurt Cobain hair. When he got suspended from school, my mom got the clippers and cut it short. It was punishment because it wasn't the way he liked. But I wouldn't call it cruel at all because it was a normal cut, not an embarrassing one.

Eh, this is still borderline for me. The way he wore his hair was part of his identity. Trying to strip him of that was pretty fucked up, IMO.

I personally don't think its any different than than taking away their cell phone or car or any other object that they love. (Like I said referring to a normal cut, not an embarrassing one)

ashley8918

jenna8984 said:

jenna8984 said:

My parents tried everything with my brother and he was always getting in trouble. When he was like 16, he had long Kurt Cobain hair. When he got suspended from school, my mom got the clippers and cut it short. It was punishment because it wasn't the way he liked. But I wouldn't call it cruel at all because it was a normal cut, not an embarrassing one.

Eh, this is still borderline for me. The way he wore his hair was part of his identity. Trying to strip him of that was pretty fucked up, IMO.

I personally don't think its any different than than taking away their cell phone or car or any other object that they love. (Like I said referring to a normal cut, not an embarrassing one)

I think there is a huge difference. Their cell phone/car/etc. isn't part of their identity. Those things are privileges.

jenna8984

Yea I suppose.

bethsmiles

This is just fucked up, as are all the humiliation as a way of punishing your kids crap that has become so popular.

My mom used humiliation as a punishment when I was younger (and I was not a wild child btw). It was awful. I didn't feel bad about whatever I had done to get into trouble I just felt horrible about myself.

I just thank god the internet wasn't as big then as it is now so at least that is all truly in the past. Once you post that shit on Facebook or anywhere else it's there, following the poor kid forever.

MairePoppy

jenna8984 said:

My parents tried everything with my brother and he was always getting in trouble. When he was like 16, he had long Kurt Cobain hair. When he got suspended from school, my mom got the clippers and cut it short. It was punishment because it wasn't the way he liked. But I wouldn't call it cruel at all because it was a normal cut, not an embarrassing one.

There were more than a few times when I felt like chopping my son's hair off, but I didn't. Did the hair cut change your brother's attitude for the better?

My mom used to embarrass me, too, and then brag to her friends about it. She thought she was very clever, but it lowered my self esteem and made me resentful.

jdluvr06

I'm not for humiliating your kids. Especially for something like grades. However, I have seen parents who do this stuff and say they had run out of options, and while I don't agree with the course they choose I feel bad for how desperate they are to straighten their kids out. There are only so many times you can ground a kid or take away something like their cell phone. Seriously some kids don't give a fuck about their parent's punishments and will continue to do what they want anyway. What are the options for parents who do everything right and then have nothing work?

larrygaga

The only time I was ever okay with humiliating a kid was that story about a parent finding out their kid was bullying some poor kids for wearing second hand clothes. The parent forced their kid into second hand ugly clothes for a few weeks to teach them a lesson about putting yourself in other's shoes and what not. I know this was met with some controversy but I felt it was appropriate. I'm not a parent, though.

Maybe if the parents in the article stopped trying to get attention on the internet and sat down with their kid during homework time everything would work out ok.