A venue rant with actual questions. :)

futuremrshp

Hi all --

So a while back, FI and I booked our venue (wedding is late April), which is at a hotel that is on the smaller side -- for events and such there are two smaller rooms .... and then they have three bigger rooms that, when you remove those panels, opens up to a nice ballroom.  The thing about it is that the hallway outside of all 5 of the rooms is a bit narrow but it's managble.   So when we booked, we were told that we could for our ceremony use in the two smaller rooms and then have our cocktail hour in the hallway outside, and then be funnelled into the 3 larger rooms for dinner and dance, etc.  (sorry for the over explanation).  When I asked how many of the rooms can we use/will they bunch us up into two rooms or all three, reserve something or not, she said we can do whatever we want and the whole space was ours for the duration.

Fast forward a few months (to last week).  We had our food tasting with the new coordinator lady (apparently the first lady was the sales lady and now we're dealing with the actual coordinator).  And I just asked "Hey, is it possible if we could use those two smaller rooms for our guests during cocktail hour so they can mill around in there instead of being cramped in the ahllway or milling into the lobby?" she then said "Oh, well, actually, those two rooms will be used right after your ceremony for another event."  FI and I were a bit shocked but kept it moving.  When I wrote her a day later, I asked what type of event it was and she said it was an awards ceremony that was taking place from 6-midnight; our cocktail hour is supposed to be from 5-6, and our guests will then funnel into the reception/ballroom after cocktail hour--- basically be in there from 6-10 or so.

(side note:  FI and I are planning on getting married at a church for teh ceremony, then have the cocktail hour and dinner and dance afterwards).  So, she suggested that we bump our cocktail hour up from 4:30-5:30 so it will be 'free from people coming in to go to the awards ceremony' (in which they would have to pass through the crowd of our guests to get to their ceremony).  She then suggested that we can have teh cocktail hour later but the awards ceremony people might want to move their stuff later.   Then she was goign to move the cocktail hour up to the second floor (which they never showed us or told us about) but, then that was booked up.    She admitted that when we booked the place, the awards ceremony people hadn't booked.  And she apologized for not telling me sooner. 

I'm trying not to be princess-y about this but I'll be darned if a heads up wouldn't have been nice.  They know that we have to book people for certain times and things like that.  And on the contract, it laid out times for the ceremony and for our cocktail hour and dinner. Additionally, when the first lady said that it was all ours to use as we want, I guess I took it kind of literally.  I'm also not sure why we have to move things around when we basically booked stuff first. 

Has anyone else experienced this with their venue?  I guess what's also frustrating me is that I literally just put in the order for my invitations.  No biggie in changing things around but just one additional thing to do you know?   And I also get that the hotels need to make money and they're going to squeeze things in whenever they can.  But it took me to randomly ask a question for her to spill the logistics beans.   

Feel free to flame me for being a princess if you think that.  I just feel like it could have been avoided. 
 

jacques27

I get that it sucks to realize you have to share some space with another event, but really not surprising unless you rented out the entire venue.  Also, your post is really confusing. 

Why would your contract spell out the times for a ceremony when you're not having the ceremony there?  Or are you?  In the first paragraph, you said you were using the two small rooms for the ceremony, then in the third paragraph you said you're getting married in a church.  Then in the fourth paragraph it said it laid out times for the ceremony (that you're not having there?).  And your contract spells out the time for a ceremony you're not having there, but not what rooms you'll be renting?  Particularly when they seem to have several event spaces (multiple rooms on first floor plus additional spaces on second)?

I guess if your contract is as confusing as your post, then I can't really say I'm surprised that you're having issues. 

You have several options:
1)  Go over your contract with a fine-tooth comb (go find someone more legal-minded than you if this isn't your forte) and enforce what is written in your contract.  If the contract states you have rented all five rooms for the duration - hold them to it.  If it only states you have certain rooms during certain time frames or doesn't specify which rooms - you're stuck.

2)  Having a cocktail hour in a cramped (public) hallway sounded like a bad idea from Day 1.  Is there even adequate seating and tables in the hallway or will people be forced to balance a plate, a drink, their purse and/or coat while standing?  Is there a reason why you can't have cocktail hour in the same space as your reception?  Lots of people do it.  People just stake their claim at their table earlier, but with a little coordination should be completely do-able.  Since you're not having your ceremony there (I think?) it's not like they need to change the entire room around to accommodate - just put up the tables with the cocktail hour goods in the same room.

3)  Move your time if your contract doesn't give you a leg to stand on, but honestly I would go with moving the cocktail hour into the reception room long before going with this option because milling around in a cramped hallway for an hour sounds wretched, even without another event in the mix.

If the contract doesn't spell things out for you though, consider it a lesson learned for the future that you should always get everything you agree to in writing and have your contracts spell out every important detail.  Likewise, whatever arrangements you make now, you should have added in as an addendum to your current contract so they can't change the terms on you again.

futuremrshp

Yeah -- sorry for the confusion.  I did warn it was a rant. :-)

When we initially signed the contract we kept the option to have the ceremony there in the hotel.  And if we changed our minds and decided to have the ceremony at the church, then the two rooms were released back to the hotel.  On the contract it was assumed that the ceremony would last an hour.   

I like the idea of opening up the reception room so folks can stake their claim, mill around, etc.  We weren't planning on having folks balance plates, etc, without tables and chairs-- the high tables and chairs and stuff would have been there regardless.  Just the idea of having a whole other party kind of come through made it less appealing.  And the hallway isn't public---it's only for access to the ballrooms--- so like random hotel guests can't come through. 

But for sure --- lesson learned from this point on.  And usually I'm pretty detailed oriented but I will put everything in that contract from now on. 

jenijoyk

I feel you. I found out a few months after booking, that they were planning on having another wedding the same night, in the restaurant adjacent to our courtyard. I was less than pleased when I started thinking about parking issues, and battling DJs. 

But, in the end the other wedding was canceled (not canceled-canceled, just moved up to an earlier date). So there's always that potential!

In the end though, it would have been fine. I was so happy on my wedding day, I probably wouldn't have noticed and ended up doing shots with the other bride. Who knows. If there's nothing you can do about it, just try to push it out of mind. On your wedding day I'm sure you won't notice and won't care.

minttobemrsb

I had similar problems with my venue, but it was with a change in budget rather than rooms. The confusion was due to a change in staff, which sounds like what is going on with you. (I was lucky and wrote everything down from the first coordinator). I initially freaked out and got super mad and the ladies here calmed me down and helped me figure it out. 

Just take a minute to read over your contract and maybe highlight specific details that you made originally. Then, just ask to meet with them to go over stuff and make sure everyone is on the same page. Personally, I would just open up the reception room to use for cocktail hour that way your guests have tables, those that want can sit down, and it prevents strangers from wandering around your cocktail hour in the main hallway. 

It sounds like they are very willing to work around this and give you options so you should have no problems. Sorry this happened to you. Hope it all works out! 

AuroraRose41

I'm sorry that you are dealing with this, but I absolutely agree with not having the cocktail hour in the hallway. I went to a wedding this past summer that did this, and there were 100 people crammed into a tiny space. There were tables but no chairs, and people were bumping into one another trying to get food and drinks at the bar. Glasses were dropped a few times and shattered. I don't think the passed apps made it all the way around, as I heard there were 4 or 5 but my friends and I only had a waiter come over to us once. Some of my friends decided to go into the ballroom just so they could sit, and were kicked out by hotel staff. We all would have much preferred to see the reception room before the actual dinner started just so we weren't as crammed in the hallway and had somewhere to sit.