PPD, gift-grabbing, AND B-Listing? I just can't.

madamerwin

I received this email from a family member a couple of weeks back. We had not seen each other in a decade until last month when we reconnected at a mutual family member's funeral. 

Said relative and spouse had a courthouse wedding this past summer, but the email below is the first I have heard about them "getting married by church" ... Clearly they sent out paper invitations at some point, because he attached a jpeg of the most horrifying invitation I have ever seen (it involved a  watercolor portrait of both of them. Stuff of nightmares.) I just had to share, because there is just too much here for me to handle. This is a great example of everything you SHOULD NOT DO.

-------------------------------

Just a reminder about Monday, March 2nd at 7:00 p.m. (Spouse) and I will be getting married by church, and you are invited! I have attached a picture of the invitation for those who did not receive a paper copy.

We are registered at Bed, Bath, and Beyond, for those interested in bringing or sending a gift. Our registry can be found on their website for those who cannot attend but would like to send a gift.

https://m.bedbathandbeyond.com/m/registryLanding

We look forward to seeing or hearing from you very soon!

hyechica81

so tacky so they decided to invite other people because they got declines and wanted some very nice gifts and money to pay off this shindig which is a ppd

and a ppd you never have anything wedidng related no first dance no bridal gown

lifeisajourney

"Getting married by church" So the church is going to officiate? Interesting......

blabla89

What's getting me is "for those who did not receive a paper copy," which sounds like it's actually saying "We don't care enough about you guys to shell out $2 to send you a real invitation, but we hope you'll come anyway and bring a nice gift."

Gross.

MadHops21

I'd go just to watch the train wreck. 

And not bring any gifts.

I'm not a nice person. 

princessgracekelly

tfmrserwin said:

I received this email from a family member a couple of weeks back. We had not seen each other in a decade until last month when we reconnected at a mutual family member's funeral. 

Said relative and spouse had a courthouse wedding this past summer, but the email below is the first I have heard about them "getting married by church" ... Clearly they sent out paper invitations at some point, because he attached a jpeg of the most horrifying invitation I have ever seen (it involved a  watercolor portrait of both of them. Stuff of nightmares.) I just had to share, because there is just too much here for me to handle. This is a great example of everything you SHOULD NOT DO.

-------------------------------

Just a reminder about Monday, March 2nd at 7:00 p.m. (Spouse) and I will be getting married by church, and you are invited! I have attached a picture of the invitation for those who did not receive a paper copy.

We are registered at Bed, Bath, and Beyond, for those interested in bringing or sending a gift. Our registry can be found on their website for those who cannot attend but would like to send a gift.

https://m.bedbathandbeyond.com/m/registryLanding

We look forward to seeing or hearing from you very soon!

Obviously everything else about the invitation is awful (jpeg e-mail attachment? Really?) but as I'm an illustrator who plans to do cartoon STDs, what was so awful about the watercolor portrait?

lyndausvi

Thanks for the laugh.

[Deleted User]

lol...too funny

I do know a couple that several years after have a civil ceremony they found a church they liked and became members and started regularly attending church. Since it was a catholic church their marriage wasn't recognized by the church since it wasn't performed in a church. They had a private church ceremony to have their marriage blessed by the church. I think they only invited their parents as church is something that was also important to both parents. To me that was the proper way to handle it. They still use their original wedding date as their anniversary too.

arrrghmatey

I'd take a picture or a screen grab of an item on their registry and e-mail it to them.

"I have attached a picture of the espresso machine from your registry for I do not wish to attend."

littlepep

Erikan73 said:

lol...too funny

I do know a couple that several years after have a civil ceremony they found a church they liked and became members and started regularly attending church. Since it was a catholic church their marriage wasn't recognized by the church since it wasn't performed in a church. They had a private church ceremony to have their marriage blessed by the church. I think they only invited their parents as church is something that was also important to both parents. To me that was the proper way to handle it. They still use their original wedding date as their anniversary too.

I had friends do something similar except they invited friends. It was like hey we are having the church bless our marriage if you'd like to come. Then they had a food and drinks that THEY hosted at a restaurant afterwards to thank anyone who came. No wedding dress, dancing or anything like that. It was perfect.

ETF (ish) extra quote box. 

madamerwin

princessgracekelly said:

tfmrserwin said:

I received this email from a family member a couple of weeks back. We had not seen each other in a decade until last month when we reconnected at a mutual family member's funeral. 

Said relative and spouse had a courthouse wedding this past summer, but the email below is the first I have heard about them "getting married by church" ... Clearly they sent out paper invitations at some point, because he attached a jpeg of the most horrifying invitation I have ever seen (it involved a  watercolor portrait of both of them. Stuff of nightmares.) I just had to share, because there is just too much here for me to handle. This is a great example of everything you SHOULD NOT DO.

-------------------------------

Just a reminder about Monday, March 2nd at 7:00 p.m. (Spouse) and I will be getting married by church, and you are invited! I have attached a picture of the invitation for those who did not receive a paper copy.

We are registered at Bed, Bath, and Beyond, for those interested in bringing or sending a gift. Our registry can be found on their website for those who cannot attend but would like to send a gift.

https://m.bedbathandbeyond.com/m/registryLanding

We look forward to seeing or hearing from you very soon!

Obviously everything else about the invitation is awful (jpeg e-mail attachment? Really?) but as I'm an illustrator who plans to do cartoon STDs, what was so awful about the watercolor portrait?

Nothing is inherently awful about watercolors, or portraits, or even using a watercolor portrait on an invitation. It was just the way it was done - it was supposed to be realistic, but it looks like they both have crazy eye.

madamerwin

Erikan73 said:

lol...too funny

I do know a couple that several years after have a civil ceremony they found a church they liked and became members and started regularly attending church. Since it was a catholic church their marriage wasn't recognized by the church since it wasn't performed in a church. They had a private church ceremony to have their marriage blessed by the church. I think they only invited their parents as church is something that was also important to both parents. To me that was the proper way to handle it. They still use their original wedding date as their anniversary too.

That doesn't really bother me, since I do understand that some people like to have their marriages blessed by their church. However, these people are treating it like it's their "real" wedding.

I think the biggest issue I have with all of this is the "Our registry can be found on their website for those who cannot attend but would like to send a gift." That's a gift grab if I've ever seen one...

Side note - if their wedding were not 1000 miles away, I may go just to watch the train wreck. But that is much to far to travel for a PPD for a relative I have seen twice in 12 years.

princessgracekelly

tfmrserwin said:

princessgracekelly said:

tfmrserwin said:

I received this email from a family member a couple of weeks back. We had not seen each other in a decade until last month when we reconnected at a mutual family member's funeral. 

Said relative and spouse had a courthouse wedding this past summer, but the email below is the first I have heard about them "getting married by church" ... Clearly they sent out paper invitations at some point, because he attached a jpeg of the most horrifying invitation I have ever seen (it involved a  watercolor portrait of both of them. Stuff of nightmares.) I just had to share, because there is just too much here for me to handle. This is a great example of everything you SHOULD NOT DO.

-------------------------------

Just a reminder about Monday, March 2nd at 7:00 p.m. (Spouse) and I will be getting married by church, and you are invited! I have attached a picture of the invitation for those who did not receive a paper copy.

We are registered at Bed, Bath, and Beyond, for those interested in bringing or sending a gift. Our registry can be found on their website for those who cannot attend but would like to send a gift.

https://m.bedbathandbeyond.com/m/registryLanding

We look forward to seeing or hearing from you very soon!

Obviously everything else about the invitation is awful (jpeg e-mail attachment? Really?) but as I'm an illustrator who plans to do cartoon STDs, what was so awful about the watercolor portrait?

Nothing is inherently awful about watercolors, or portraits, or even using a watercolor portrait on an invitation. It was just the way it was done - it was supposed to be realistic, but it looks like they both have crazy eye.

Ah, I figured as much. Just had a moment of panic that hand-drawn stuff is tacky or something.

madamerwin

princessgracekelly said:

tfmrserwin said:

princessgracekelly said:

tfmrserwin said:

I received this email from a family member a couple of weeks back. We had not seen each other in a decade until last month when we reconnected at a mutual family member's funeral. 

Said relative and spouse had a courthouse wedding this past summer, but the email below is the first I have heard about them "getting married by church" ... Clearly they sent out paper invitations at some point, because he attached a jpeg of the most horrifying invitation I have ever seen (it involved a  watercolor portrait of both of them. Stuff of nightmares.) I just had to share, because there is just too much here for me to handle. This is a great example of everything you SHOULD NOT DO.

-------------------------------

Just a reminder about Monday, March 2nd at 7:00 p.m. (Spouse) and I will be getting married by church, and you are invited! I have attached a picture of the invitation for those who did not receive a paper copy.

We are registered at Bed, Bath, and Beyond, for those interested in bringing or sending a gift. Our registry can be found on their website for those who cannot attend but would like to send a gift.

https://m.bedbathandbeyond.com/m/registryLanding

We look forward to seeing or hearing from you very soon!

Obviously everything else about the invitation is awful (jpeg e-mail attachment? Really?) but as I'm an illustrator who plans to do cartoon STDs, what was so awful about the watercolor portrait?

Nothing is inherently awful about watercolors, or portraits, or even using a watercolor portrait on an invitation. It was just the way it was done - it was supposed to be realistic, but it looks like they both have crazy eye.

Ah, I figured as much. Just had a moment of panic that hand-drawn stuff is tacky or something.

No, watercolors/illustrations are lovely when done tastefully. This one in particular was just scary.

SP29

Ack! So many levels of wrong!

Married "by church"- makes me think that they thought, "Oh, well we've already been married in a courthouse, so now we'd like to do it in a church, and then maybe in 6 months we'll have an outdoor ceremony, because we haven't been married in that environment either!". 

The whole "in case you didn't get a paper copy" is so rude. Obviously people didn't get a paper copy because THEY didn't send one. Don't put it on your guests that it is "their" fault they didn't "pick one up from the pile on the desk on their way out" (like it's school or something...). 

And the gifts is rude too. Here's the link in case you can't attend but want to send a gift. No duh- anyone can send a gift to anyone at any time. 

Oh man.... I wouldn't go either.

And, having your marriage blessed by the church is completely different. Just don't pretend it's your "real" wedding.