PPDs....ugh.

iloveotters2014

My sis is getting married pretty soon and I was chatting with her last night about officiants....as in how she hasn't nailed one down yet, and basically I told her that if I was her I would be freaking out!

Well then she said the kicker. "If we don't find one then I guess we will just go to the courthouse a few days before."

I cannot tell you ladies how hurt I was by this. It felt like the wind was knocked out of me! I told her that I want nothing more than to stand by my sisters side and watch her marry her soul mate, and for her to not allow me to do that because she didnt plan properly would really hurt me and probably many of our family members.

Her response?...."Chill out. Stop trying to make my wedding about you."

Not really sure what else I can say to her. Im just really hoping she finds an officiant. I will be so sad if she does something like this.

UGH! - Lurkers. It really sucks to miss out on seeing the people you care about get married. Please don't do that to people you care about.

bethsmiles

Her plan doesn't even make sense though. If they went down to the courthouse a few days before because they couldn't find an officiant they still wouldn't have someone the day they are planning on getting married.

AddieCake

I'm with Beth, unless they just plan to get a friend to pretend to marry them.

WinstonsGirl

The last wedding I attend, the B&G did this.  They got married the day before cos they found out their friend couldn't legally marry them.  He just did a ceremony on the original date.  And it was very last minute to, not planned until a couple of days before.  While there were also many other etiquette problems with this wedding, I didn't see the point of us attending anymore cos they were already married.  

iloveotters2014

I think that's her plan. Just get a friend to fake it if they get married before. At least I would assume so. It's a mess. I just don't get how you could plan the party aspect before the important marriage part. I'm so bummed about the whole thing. I was really excited for her and getting more excited as it got closer.

I'm guessing I cant say anything else to her right? I mean I've said my peace. She didn't care. She acted like I was trying to "take over her day." I just don't know how to make her understand that people actually care about seeing her get married.

doeydo

iloveotters2014 said:

I think that's her plan. Just get a friend to fake it if they get married before. At least I would assume so. It's a mess. I just don't get how you could plan the party aspect before the important marriage part. I'm so bummed about the whole thing. I was really excited for her and getting more excited as it got closer.

I'm guessing I cant say anything else to her right? I mean I've said my peace. She didn't care. She acted like I was trying to "take over her day." I just don't know how to make her understand that people actually care about seeing her get married.

You can tell her how great TK forums are and that she should come check them out.    We can tell her like it is.

redoryx

iloveotters2014 said:

I think that's her plan. Just get a friend to fake it if they get married before. At least I would assume so. It's a mess. I just don't get how you could plan the party aspect before the important marriage part. I'm so bummed about the whole thing. I was really excited for her and getting more excited as it got closer.

I'm guessing I cant say anything else to her right? I mean I've said my peace. She didn't care. She acted like I was trying to "take over her day." I just don't know how to make her understand that people actually care about seeing her get married.

What did you actually say to her, though? Obviously it would depend on your relationship with your sister, but if I suspected my sister was going to pull a PPD I'd definitely call her out on it. 

iloveotters2014

redoryx said:

iloveotters2014 said:

I think that's her plan. Just get a friend to fake it if they get married before. At least I would assume so. It's a mess. I just don't get how you could plan the party aspect before the important marriage part. I'm so bummed about the whole thing. I was really excited for her and getting more excited as it got closer.

I'm guessing I cant say anything else to her right? I mean I've said my peace. She didn't care. She acted like I was trying to "take over her day." I just don't know how to make her understand that people actually care about seeing her get married.

What did you actually say to her, though? Obviously it would depend on your relationship with your sister, but if I suspected my sister was going to pull a PPD I'd definitely call her out on it. 

Basically at first I thought she was joking and said something along the lines of "omg haha don't even joke about that! that makes me so ragey"

And then she was like um I'm not kidding people do that all the time.

So I started in on how it important it is to me to stand by her while she actually gets married and it would hurt me and our family so much if she takes that opportunity away from us.

And she basically said people would get over it and she doesn't care.

So yeah I'm thinking she just doesn't get it.