Is this normal- in a rut :/

[Deleted User]

Since our wedding I'm in a serious rut. I'm so very blessed to be married to DH. He's amazing, but I can't seem to get out of my funk. I feel let down by my wedding (bummed by the budget - I couldn't seem to get it to look the way I had envisioned it.) But this isn't the only thing I'm frustrated with.  Now, I find myself obsessing about being the "perfect wife". No one is putting pressure on me, but me. I'm constantly trying to serve the best dinner, be ironing queen, and make Jenna Jameson seem like a kitten in the bedroom. I notice I'm also comparing myself to his mother in the "domestic goddess race", trying to outdo her as the woman in his life. Which is also odd. I love my MIL. I just feel like I'm trying to live up to some perfect standard, and frustrated that I'm falling short. (and again, I'm aware that I'm the only one putting pressure on myself.) What the heck is up with this?

lb1212

I do the same thing!  Any time I feel like I "mess up", I feel awful! I know he doesn't expect me to be a domestic-sex-godess and that I'm the one putting me in that "role". I've talked to DH about it, when I was freaking out our place being messy. I was exhausted, but trying to force myself to stay up and clean. I know that he doesn't love me any less for going to sleep instead rather than having a spotless apartment.

I think, for me, I love my DH so much, that I want our married life to be perfect. Sometimes I think we need to have our 1st post wedding fight, just to prove that we won't break or crumble.  Logically, I know we won't break or crumble, but emotionally, I think, I worry about that.

Kristin789

Totally agree with previous posters, and I'll check back to see if anyone has any advice on how to settle down and get on with life, instead of pushing so hard.  I've been married a while now, and I'm still doing this...