Why do people think it's ok to be rude?

kaos16

Last night we went to a restaurant/bowling alley with friends. . . . . there was a snowstorm, big surprise, so they were closing early.  We were eating dinner and were told that they would close around 7:30-8.  It was just before 6 at that point.  On Sunday nights they have a deal, $12 for 2 hours of bowling after 6pm.  The waitress explained that because they were closing early they would honor that deal even though it was early, and that we were welcome to do 1 hour for $6.  We finished up and walked over to the bowling part of the building.  When we got there a different girl told us she would charge us for one game and that it actually works out cheaper.  One game is $6.95 per person.  We questioned her on how that was cheaper and got a TON of attitude but no explanation.

After we got settled at the lane a message showed up on the screen that they were now closing at 7 due to the weather.  Not only did we pay extra, but now we were only getting like 45 minutes of playing time.  I approached the manager to explain that we were told 2 different things by two different people, that we ended up paying more, if even only by a dollar per person, but that when we questioned it we were given such a hard time and attitude.  I get that there was a weather issue that came up, but I feel like everyone should be on the same page.  He apologized, and I went back to the lane to play.

At that point, the girl who rang us up for bowling came over with 4 passes for a free game each, threw that at my friend and said "here, that's for your dollar."  You don't even want to know how badly I wanted to smack her. . . . I just don't get why you need to be snotty about that!  She could have either explained it properly without attitude when we asked, charged us correctly, or come over with the passes and say something not rude!  

banana468

At that point I'd be walking back to the manager WITH her.

Yeah, you can't be in a service industry and be rude.   Believe me I want to be at times but your job is to explain the policy and not cop an attitude with it. 

amelisha

Honestly, I can't believe this was significant enough to you for you to post it.

Like...no, no one should be rude, but your minimum-wage employee having a crappy day or whatever and acting like a brat to some customers who may or may not have been treating HER with kindness (maybe you were, I don't know, but I'm just saying...often there's two sides to this kind of thing) is really not worth getting upset about, especially over a few bucks. 

I dunno. It just seems like an incredibly trivial thing to be annoyed about to me. But maybe I'm more willing than average to cut people a break.

kaos16

amelisha said:

Honestly, I can't believe this was significant enough to you for you to post it.

Like...no, no one should be rude, but your minimum-wage employee having a crappy day or whatever and acting like a brat to some customers who may or may not have been treating HER with kindness (maybe you were, I don't know, but I'm just saying...often there's two sides to this kind of thing) is really not worth getting upset about, especially over a few bucks. 

I dunno. It just seems like an incredibly trivial thing to be annoyed about to me. But maybe I'm more willing than average to cut people a break.

it's the chitchat board. . . . it was just something that happened over the weekend.  It's a story I would tell a friend because if it's nonsense, so I figured I would share with the knotties I chat with here.

Maggie0829

Honestly, if I knew that a snowstorm was rolling in and that the place decided to close early due to that snowstorm I wouldn't have even bowled.  I would have eaten dinner and then headed home.

KatieinBkln

I would be irritated, also. But these days I have exactly zero problem bringing these things up to the manager. It's amazing how much better I feel after I've informed someone (politely, but honestly) that my experience at their establishment wasn't great.

I can understand how wires would get crossed in that scenario, but I remember working at annoying customer service jobs, and somehow I never acted like a dick to paying customers when it turned out I got something wrong. The employee doesn't get a pass from me just because her job probably sucks and other people are (no doubt, at a bowling alley) rude to her. It doesn't mean I think she should be fired or yelled at, either, but I definitely would've informed her boss that her attitude left a lot to be desired. 

themuffinman16

Maybe the girl didn't do the math in her head and had not realized it was more expensive. She should have said, I'm sorry you are right. OR Let me talk to my manager and ask him what he thinks I should do. It didn't need the attitude.

  I think in this day and age, with so many entitled teenagers, we can expect to see customer service become extinct. If people don't think you have it in them to be polite to everyone, then they have no business working in the service industry.

amelisha

kaos16 said:

it's the chitchat board. . . . it was just something that happened over the weekend.  It's a story I would tell a friend because if it's nonsense, so I figured I would share with the knotties I chat with here.

UGH BOXES SORRY.

My point wasn't so much "why are you sharing something so trivial here on TK Chit-Chat?" but "why would such a circumstance have annoyed you in the first place, given the unusual situation and the incredibly small dollar amount?" 

flutteringinfl

I think she could have definitely been nicer. I haven't encountered too much in the way of rude service, but last week my sister had an encounter that was mega rude. She rides her city's disabled bus service to get around, and when she was on her way home from work she was the only one on the bus. She started texting a friend and the driver just straight up started yelling numbers to confuse her. Then when he got to her house he drove past it and when she told him he missed it he rolled his eyes and said, "You missed it" in a mocking tone. Nasty jerk.

photokitty

amelisha said:

Honestly, I can't believe this was significant enough to you for you to post it.

Like...no, no one should be rude, but your minimum-wage employee having a crappy day or whatever and acting like a brat to some customers who may or may not have been treating HER with kindness (maybe you were, I don't know, but I'm just saying...often there's two sides to this kind of thing) is really not worth getting upset about, especially over a few bucks. 

I dunno. It just seems like an incredibly trivial thing to be annoyed about to me. But maybe I'm more willing than average to cut people a break.

I don't care it you are minimum wage or a volunteer - you should NEVER throw something, even a pice of paper, at a customer - or any human being for that matter!

I wouldn't have bother to write it on here, bc I would I written corporate or Yelp. Her behavior was completely unacceptable, regardless of the type of day you're are having.

This is by no means the whiniest post I've read on CC in the last 24 hours, so I don't know why the OP would be getting a side eye for posting it.

amelisha said:

My point wasn't so much "why are you sharing something so trivial here on TK Chit-Chat?" but "why would such a circumstance have annoyed you in the first place, given the unusual situation and the incredibly small dollar amount?" 

If CC was only made up of non-trivial stuff then the board would be half it's current size.

thisismynickname2

Ugh, that's frustrating.

I know how it feels to get riled up and indignant-- you have to let it out to friends of course! Hell, I'm still smarting over some douchebag who was needlessly rude to me in a yoga class, of all places. 

When it comes to customer service, I just keep in mind that the workers are being exposed to major stressors--- closing early certainly changes their normal routine, and would prompt more service needs than normal.  She didn't express her frustration in the right way, but sometimes it's harder than other times to maintain a level head. 

Recently I was on a delayed flight and the flight attendant was passing out water. As is normal, she started at the front of the cabin and worked her way back. On her second trip to replenish her tray, she passed by people that wanted water on the way to the front and people were like, "Hey wait"-- she called back over her shoulder, "I'll be there in a minute, starting up here--" and then I heard those customers snarking on how she "snapped" at them. Dude! Give her a break! She's passing out water on a delayed flight in a logical manner.  Combatting rudeness with rudeness isn't necessary. 

It's ok to feel crabby about it. It's also ok to put yourself in their shoes and try to cut them a break. 

kaos16

thisismynickname said:

Ugh, that's frustrating.

I know how it feels to get riled up and indignant-- you have to let it out to friends of course! Hell, I'm still smarting over some douchebag who was needlessly rude to me in a yoga class, of all places. 

When it comes to customer service, I just keep in mind that the workers are being exposed to major stressors--- closing early certainly changes their normal routine, and would prompt more service needs than normal.  She didn't express her frustration in the right way, but sometimes it's harder than other times to maintain a level head. 

Recently I was on a delayed flight and the flight attendant was passing out water. As is normal, she started at the front of the cabin and worked her way back. On her second trip to replenish her tray, she passed by people that wanted water on the way to the front and people were like, "Hey wait"-- she called back over her shoulder, "I'll be there in a minute, starting up here--" and then I heard those customers snarking on how she "snapped" at them. Dude! Give her a break! She's passing out water on a delayed flight in a logical manner.  Combatting rudeness with rudeness isn't necessary. 

It's ok to feel crabby about it. It's also ok to put yourself in their shoes and try to cut them a break. 

This is why I didn't yelp about it. . . . I know there were circumstances going on with the weather and whatnot. 

novella1186

flutteringinfl said:

I think she could have definitely been nicer. I haven't encountered too much in the way of rude service, but last week my sister had an encounter that was mega rude. She rides her city's disabled bus service to get around, and when she was on her way home from work she was the only one on the bus. She started texting a friend and the driver just straight up started yelling numbers to confuse her. Then when he got to her house he drove past it and when she told him he missed it he rolled his eyes and said, "You missed it" in a mocking tone. Nasty jerk.

OMG!!! That is fucking awful. I want to punch that douche in the face. What a disgusting way to treat someone.

chibiyui

Yeah, she was rude as fuck, and shouldn't have acted like that towards you. 

But, if I'm out someplace and they're closing early because a snowstorm is coming in, I go the fuck home. It sucks to be at work during a snowstorm because people won't go the fuck home. If you guys left at 7, the people working aren't leaving until 7:30-8:00. Staying is putting them at extra risk to travel home, which is not part of the service industry's job description. 

banana468

chibiyui said:

Yeah, she was rude as fuck, and shouldn't have acted like that towards you. 

But, if I'm out someplace and they're closing early because a snowstorm is coming in, I go the fuck home. It sucks to be at work during a snowstorm because people won't go the fuck home. If you guys left at 7, the people working aren't leaving until 7:30-8:00. Staying is putting them at extra risk to travel home, which is not part of the service industry's job description. 

I think it really depends.   Then again, I'm living in CT and we have been hit with a ton of snow.   And how many days of work has DH missed?   ONE - and it was for a blizzard.   I've missed no days but I work from home and therefore I can't really complain about the commute.

If you live in an area where it snows then you need to be prepared to get to where you're going IN the snow.   I can't remember where the OP lives so it's more than possible that it's an area not used to winter weather but if it is, then unless we're talking about white out / blizzard conditions or other issues that will make the roads impassible, I'm really anti using the snow and safety as a blanket reason to go home.     

kaos16

New York......where we are on "storm" number 58767855.  It's nonsense!

Maggie0829

banana468 said:

chibiyui said:

Yeah, she was rude as fuck, and shouldn't have acted like that towards you. 

But, if I'm out someplace and they're closing early because a snowstorm is coming in, I go the fuck home. It sucks to be at work during a snowstorm because people won't go the fuck home. If you guys left at 7, the people working aren't leaving until 7:30-8:00. Staying is putting them at extra risk to travel home, which is not part of the service industry's job description. 

I think it really depends.   Then again, I'm living in CT and we have been hit with a ton of snow.   And how many days of work has DH missed?   ONE - and it was for a blizzard.   I've missed no days but I work from home and therefore I can't really complain about the commute.

If you live in an area where it snows then you need to be prepared to get to where you're going IN the snow.   I can't remember where the OP lives so it's more than possible that it's an area not used to winter weather but if it is, then unless we're talking about white out / blizzard conditions or other issues that will make the roads impassible, I'm really anti using the snow and safety as a blanket reason to go home.     

Then the bowling alley shouldn't have closed early.

Schools close early/open late due to bad weather.  So do government offices and other offices/businesses.  I mean, do you think that those things shouldn't close at all?  And I don't care if you (general you) live in a place that is used to snow or not.  When there is bad weather there is a reason places close and the news tells you to stay off the street, and that is to keep people safe and prevent a shit ton of accidents.  I am sure the bowling alley didn't close early for the hell of it.

photokitty

If I were the manager and wanted to close early, I would have apologized, given everyone a free game coupon and sent them home - not sent mixed messages through my employees and stayed open for another 90 mins or 2 hours. While a business should be able to do what they feel is in the best interest f the employees, especially for safety reason - they should not take it out on the customer.

banana468

Maggie0829 said:

banana468 said:

chibiyui said:

Yeah, she was rude as fuck, and shouldn't have acted like that towards you. 

But, if I'm out someplace and they're closing early because a snowstorm is coming in, I go the fuck home. It sucks to be at work during a snowstorm because people won't go the fuck home. If you guys left at 7, the people working aren't leaving until 7:30-8:00. Staying is putting them at extra risk to travel home, which is not part of the service industry's job description. 

I think it really depends.   Then again, I'm living in CT and we have been hit with a ton of snow.   And how many days of work has DH missed?   ONE - and it was for a blizzard.   I've missed no days but I work from home and therefore I can't really complain about the commute.

If you live in an area where it snows then you need to be prepared to get to where you're going IN the snow.   I can't remember where the OP lives so it's more than possible that it's an area not used to winter weather but if it is, then unless we're talking about white out / blizzard conditions or other issues that will make the roads impassible, I'm really anti using the snow and safety as a blanket reason to go home.     

Then the bowling alley shouldn't have closed early.

Schools close early/open late due to bad weather.  So do government offices and other offices/businesses.  I mean, do you think that those things shouldn't close at all?  And I don't care if you (general you) live in a place that is used to snow or not.  When there is bad weather there is a reason places close and the news tells you to stay off the street, and that is to keep people safe and prevent a shit ton of accidents.  I am sure the bowling alley didn't close early for the hell of it.

Schools are transporting kids and have city busses.   They open themselves to lawsuits when they don't close.    More often than not, when the local schools have closed, the offices remain open.  So they're caring about the transportation of kids but they're not keeping the school board offices closed.   

More often than not, business close in bad weather due to the loss of revenue.   It's because it's more expensive to stay open than it is to close.   You're right that DH and I don't seek travel plans when it snows but we don't let it stop us either.     Until I started working from home I could count on one hand the # of times that my office closed due to weather.  

I get that driving in the snow sucks.   Trust me.   But I call BS on saying that "driving in the snow isn't part of my job description." No, working your assigned hours is part of your job description.

And again, this is for issues of routine snow where it's just part of the norm.   I'm not referring to blizzards where you can't see for shit.  

kaos16

@banana468 can I please just interrupt for a second to say how gorgeous your babies are.....your daughter's eyebrows are unreal!

ashley8918

kaos16 said:

@banana468 can I please just interrupt for a second to say how gorgeous your babies are.....your daughter's eyebrows are unreal!

Hahaha, I was thinking the same. I am super jealous of that perfect arch.

Maggie0829

banana468 said:

banana468 said:

chibiyui said:

Yeah, she was rude as fuck, and shouldn't have acted like that towards you. 

But, if I'm out someplace and they're closing early because a snowstorm is coming in, I go the fuck home. It sucks to be at work during a snowstorm because people won't go the fuck home. If you guys left at 7, the people working aren't leaving until 7:30-8:00. Staying is putting them at extra risk to travel home, which is not part of the service industry's job description. 

I think it really depends.   Then again, I'm living in CT and we have been hit with a ton of snow.   And how many days of work has DH missed?   ONE - and it was for a blizzard.   I've missed no days but I work from home and therefore I can't really complain about the commute.

If you live in an area where it snows then you need to be prepared to get to where you're going IN the snow.   I can't remember where the OP lives so it's more than possible that it's an area not used to winter weather but if it is, then unless we're talking about white out / blizzard conditions or other issues that will make the roads impassible, I'm really anti using the snow and safety as a blanket reason to go home.     

Then the bowling alley shouldn't have closed early.

Schools close early/open late due to bad weather.  So do government offices and other offices/businesses.  I mean, do you think that those things shouldn't close at all?  And I don't care if you (general you) live in a place that is used to snow or not.  When there is bad weather there is a reason places close and the news tells you to stay off the street, and that is to keep people safe and prevent a shit ton of accidents.  I am sure the bowling alley didn't close early for the hell of it.

Schools are transporting kids and have city busses.   They open themselves to lawsuits when they don't close.    More often than not, when the local schools have closed, the offices remain open.  So they're caring about the transportation of kids but they're not keeping the school board offices closed.   

More often than not, business close in bad weather due to the loss of revenue.   It's because it's more expensive to stay open than it is to close.   You're right that DH and I don't seek travel plans when it snows but we don't let it stop us either.     Until I started working from home I could count on one hand the # of times that my office closed due to weather.  

I get that driving in the snow sucks.   Trust me.   But I call BS on saying that "driving in the snow isn't part of my job description." No, working your assigned hours is part of your job description.

And again, this is for issues of routine snow where it's just part of the norm.   I'm not referring to blizzards where you can't see for shit.  

So then explain to me why all of our State government offices were on a 2 hour delay this morning? No issue with transporting kids there.  Probably because they realized that the roads were hazardous and that their employees should not be driving on them.  Same with my H's work (he installs HVAC systems), he was on a 2 hour delay this morning.  Again, he is not transporting children anywhere but rather installing heating and air systems.

Yes, businesses close because they know that they may have a large reduction in revenue but there are also businesses out there that care about the well being of their employees.  This bowling alley probably was a combo of both of those things.  This doesn't excuse the actions of that girl at all of course.  I am just pointing out that being worried about your safety for having to drive in crappy weather conditions is very much a concern of not only employees but also their employers. Hence why places close early or open late.  Or all businesses could just not give a shit, cause that is awesome.

Cookie Pusher

Maggie0829 said:

banana468 said:

chibiyui said:

Yeah, she was rude as fuck, and shouldn't have acted like that towards you. 

But, if I'm out someplace and they're closing early because a snowstorm is coming in, I go the fuck home. It sucks to be at work during a snowstorm because people won't go the fuck home. If you guys left at 7, the people working aren't leaving until 7:30-8:00. Staying is putting them at extra risk to travel home, which is not part of the service industry's job description. 

I think it really depends.   Then again, I'm living in CT and we have been hit with a ton of snow.   And how many days of work has DH missed?   ONE - and it was for a blizzard.   I've missed no days but I work from home and therefore I can't really complain about the commute.

If you live in an area where it snows then you need to be prepared to get to where you're going IN the snow.   I can't remember where the OP lives so it's more than possible that it's an area not used to winter weather but if it is, then unless we're talking about white out / blizzard conditions or other issues that will make the roads impassible, I'm really anti using the snow and safety as a blanket reason to go home.     

Then the bowling alley shouldn't have closed early.

Schools close early/open late due to bad weather.  So do government offices and other offices/businesses.  I mean, do you think that those things shouldn't close at all?  And I don't care if you (general you) live in a place that is used to snow or not.  When there is bad weather there is a reason places close and the news tells you to stay off the street, and that is to keep people safe and prevent a shit ton of accidents.  I am sure the bowling alley didn't close early for the hell of it.

We got around 3-4" of snow yesterday. Totally a non-issue in NJ. Until it started raining. And even that wasn't too bad until the temperature took a sudden nose-dive earlier than they were predicting. Suddenly, slush and ice everywhere even the major highways (the Parkway was no fun last night) and roads that had been brine-treated. I can see how businesses can have to scramble to make decisions about whether to close early or not and may have to adjust their plans.

banana468

ashley8918 said:

kaos16 said:

@banana468 can I please just interrupt for a second to say how gorgeous your babies are.....your daughter's eyebrows are unreal!

Hahaha, I was thinking the same. I am super jealous of that perfect arch.

Awww thanks!   She has my face.   And she's EXCELLENT at what I call the Irish Rubber Face.    Kid cracks me up all.the.time. 

Then there's her brother.  He's pretty cute too.   

banana468

Maggie0829 said:

banana468 said:

banana468 said:

chibiyui said:

Yeah, she was rude as fuck, and shouldn't have acted like that towards you. 

But, if I'm out someplace and they're closing early because a snowstorm is coming in, I go the fuck home. It sucks to be at work during a snowstorm because people won't go the fuck home. If you guys left at 7, the people working aren't leaving until 7:30-8:00. Staying is putting them at extra risk to travel home, which is not part of the service industry's job description. 

I think it really depends.   Then again, I'm living in CT and we have been hit with a ton of snow.   And how many days of work has DH missed?   ONE - and it was for a blizzard.   I've missed no days but I work from home and therefore I can't really complain about the commute.

If you live in an area where it snows then you need to be prepared to get to where you're going IN the snow.   I can't remember where the OP lives so it's more than possible that it's an area not used to winter weather but if it is, then unless we're talking about white out / blizzard conditions or other issues that will make the roads impassible, I'm really anti using the snow and safety as a blanket reason to go home.     

Then the bowling alley shouldn't have closed early.

Schools close early/open late due to bad weather.  So do government offices and other offices/businesses.  I mean, do you think that those things shouldn't close at all?  And I don't care if you (general you) live in a place that is used to snow or not.  When there is bad weather there is a reason places close and the news tells you to stay off the street, and that is to keep people safe and prevent a shit ton of accidents.  I am sure the bowling alley didn't close early for the hell of it.

Schools are transporting kids and have city busses.   They open themselves to lawsuits when they don't close.    More often than not, when the local schools have closed, the offices remain open.  So they're caring about the transportation of kids but they're not keeping the school board offices closed.   

More often than not, business close in bad weather due to the loss of revenue.   It's because it's more expensive to stay open than it is to close.   You're right that DH and I don't seek travel plans when it snows but we don't let it stop us either.     Until I started working from home I could count on one hand the # of times that my office closed due to weather.  

I get that driving in the snow sucks.   Trust me.   But I call BS on saying that "driving in the snow isn't part of my job description." No, working your assigned hours is part of your job description.

And again, this is for issues of routine snow where it's just part of the norm.   I'm not referring to blizzards where you can't see for shit.  

So then explain to me why all of our State government offices were on a 2 hour delay this morning? No issue with transporting kids there.  Probably because they realized that the roads were hazardous and that their employees should not be driving on them.  Same with my H's work (he installs HVAC systems), he was on a 2 hour delay this morning.  Again, he is not transporting children anywhere but rather installing heating and air systems.

Yes, businesses close because they know that they may have a large reduction in revenue but there are also businesses out there that care about the well being of their employees.  This bowling alley probably was a combo of both of those things.  This doesn't excuse the actions of that girl at all of course.  I am just pointing out that being worried about your safety for having to drive in crappy weather conditions is very much a concern of not only employees but also their employers. Hence why places close early or open late.  Or all businesses could just not give a shit, cause that is awesome.

OK, I know my posts sound harsh.  I do understand that driving in snow can be a bitch.

But snow is also part of the area that we live in so I take issue when I see it as a reason to NOT be open.   My DH's job has either stayed open in inclement weather or just closed altogether (for blizzards and a hurricane).     He doesn't get a delay and if he doesn't work 40 hours a week then the lost time is deducted as vacation.   His employer is the largest employer in the local area so their decisions affect thousands of people.   

My main gripe is when a business closes and uses safety as the reason to not be open and when people aren't compensated.   And my personal gripe is that my DCP has done this once in addition to the large blizzard.   And when they close, they don't refund my money.   So I see a FB post that reads how they're looking out for everyone's safety but I still have to work, DH still has to work and now I'm out a rather large amount of money that I don't get back.   Then I'm either trying to WFH with two kids under foot (and DD is pretty high energy and a nursing 6 mo isn't exactly low maintenance) or we're driving FURTHER to bring the kids to be with family for the day.

Sorry for the post hijack.   

kaos16

Sometimes I wish I would get a day off in inclement weather.  I am an attorney, I work for the state.  There have been days when courts are closed due to weather. . . . we technically have to come to work, or take the days off of our timesheets.  This is the case even if a state of emergency is declared and we are told to stay off the roads.  It has something to do with police. . . If we don't have to work the police don't either, and they'd have to pay extra to have police protection.  I'm not exactly certain, but it sure is frustrating!