Help me settle an argument re: dress codes

levioosa

aphrodite0869 said:

I had people ask me what they should wear because our wedding looked "fancy."  But to some of these people who ask, "fancy" is an Outback.  If you don't care if some people show up in jeans or some show up in suit's then don't say anything about the dress code.  If you want a more formal fancy wedding then put black tie.  I personally don't care what people show up in.  I'm gonna be more focused on getting married and how I look instead of how the people who are coming are dressed.  Everyone has a different comfort level and I want them to be comfortable.  So it's totally up to you and how you feel about what others are wearing. 

You tend to give terrible advice.

Black tie isn't about "pretty pictures" or "nice dresses."  It's a complete package event with requirements (Southern has given an example of a few).

Putting black tie on the invites when it isn't a black tie event is insulting and rude.  People often don't own tuxes or long evening gowns, so then they must go out and buy or rent the outfit just so you can have nice pictures.  As a host, it is your duty to actually host a black tie event if you are indicating that on invitations.