NWR - When do you host a baby shower?

labro

I've never been involved in planning a baby shower before and I've been to only a few, most of my close friends who were pregnant lived far away so it wasn't even an option to attend. My sister is pregnant (YAY!!) so my mom and I are discussing hosting a joint, co-ed bbq style shower for her (if that's what she wants, we're open to ladies only, or whatever else). Her due date is September  21 and it's her and her husband's first child.

What's considered too early? My mom and I were discussing doing it mid-July for a few reasons. One, August in north Georgia is significantly more uncomfortable than July tends to be. In July we're still getting reasonable weather in the 80s with mild humidity and what we're thinking of would be an indoor/outdoor shower with food and drinks inside with lawn games outside (and maybe a baseball game on as well for anyone who's interested). September can be ok weather wise, but I feel like hosting a shower in September is seriously flirting with her due date and may be too much for them. I guess my only concern is IF the general consensus is that July is too soon for a baby shower for a mom to be who's due in September. What does TK say?

thisismynickname2

I think you're fine in July. Some cultures don't have showers until after the baby is born, but for others, a month or two ahead of the due date seems the norm. 

Exciting times! 

Maggie0829

I think any time in the last trimester is fine.

RebeccaFlower

I get annoyed when showers are 3-4 months early because I like to knit baby blankets and sometimes if I find out at 12-16 weeks, that doesn't give me time. 

My H would haaaaaate a co-ed baby shower, so I'd just make sure to clear that. Also, I would nix big games like baseball. People feel obligated to hang around/ play but it sounds like you know not to pressure people into playing. You know your circle best. 

Happy planning!

[Deleted User]

My sister is due towards the end of April.  Her girlfriends threw her a shower on February 21st.  I think a July shower for a September baby sounds good.

I think the difference of timing between wedding showers and baby showers is that for babies, you need to have everything ready ahead of time.  The parents need to set up the crib or bassinet, they have to wash all the clothes in Woolite for Sensitive Babies or whatever, they need to know how to properly install the carseat into the car.  Whereas for a wedding, you get home from the wedding or honeymoon and can open boxes and put away your new dishes; you don't have a needy small person taking up all your time.

climbingsingle

I think you're totally OK with July. 

labro

@RebeccaFlower Her H is definitely the type of guy who'd be interested in being involved in a co-ed shower, and I think as long as we make it more "guy-friendly" - IE less "guess the baby food" games and more "here's some beer and ladder golf", then it should be ok. Talking circles, this would definitely be ok and appropriate as long as we pass the word along and don't send super cutesy invitations that imply a more traditional shower.

I guess my only worry is, is there some sort of etiquette rule I've never heard of determining when a baby shower is appropriate and when it isn't?

ETA:

I responded and missed everyone else's response! I'm glad July is good! We're SO excited for my sister and her husband! It's the first grandchild for both sides so this kid is probably going to be beyond spoiled.

VulgarGirl

@RebeccaFlower Her H is definitely the type of guy who'd be interested in being involved in a co-ed shower, and I think as long as we make it more "guy-friendly" - IE less "guess the baby food" games and more "here's some beer and ladder golf", then it should be ok.

Yeah...despite my vagina, I hate "guess the baby food" and "guess the smushed up candy bar made to look like poo" and "how fat is mom" games. I went to one where they did baby pictionary (so draw pictures of things related to infants), guess the number of candies in the jar, and something else I can't remember right now, and then there was a onesie/bib decorating station of anyone who wanted to give it a go. It was easy, it was fun, and no one made perfectly good candy look like shit. 

Co-ed showers are pretty common in my group. Co-ed baby showers and wedding showers. They function like most showers just...with...both genders present. 

labro

@MagicInk I say "guy-friendly" but let's be honest with ourselves. Who wouldn't prefer alcohol and ladder golf to eating random baby foods at any shower? We wouldn't actually do that particular game anyway, co-ed shower or not, I would've stuck more to stuff like you described.

MyNameIsNot

Typically showers are around month 6-8. You don't want to be too close to the due date, because you want the new parents to have plenty of time to finish getting whatever they need and set up the registry. July is totally fine.

I'm just going to throw out there, remember that week when it was 105 for 6 days in a row the summer before last? That was in July. You might get nice weather, but I'd plan around the possibility that it might be really hot too. Maybe do it later in the day, or do something with a tent or fans to get some shade or breeze. 

labro

@MyNameIsNot I kind of described it in my OP but I'll go in to more detail. It's going to be indoor-outdoor at my parent's house. Food and drinks and gift opening will be kept inside (in their air conditioned basement) and yard games will obviously be outside. They also have a porch and covered patio with fans if people want to stay outside but not out in the sun.

I honestly don't remember that week at all. I think my memory remembers the obscenely cold awful days where the city shuts down more than the hot days.

MyNameIsNot

It sounds like you'll be fine. People are used to the heat and know what to do.

I think I only remember that heat because it was the first year I started gardening, and I came back from the beach to find that I'd lost a bunch of plants. Still, I'll take 107 over 7 any day of the week. 

sunset30

Most posters have covered it above, but I think weeks 27 - 34 of pregnancy are pretty typical times for showers. Once you start getting later than that, many women start getting to be uncomfortable and in month 9 the baby can come early! Plus, it is helpful to have a few weeks to wash the clothes she will get and make any returns / exchanges that are necessary and get the remaining items that you need for baby that she wasn't gifted. 

A July shower sounds like its pretty in line with typical timing.

erinlin25

July shower for a September baby is perfect.  We threw my BBF one at the end of January and her baby girl just arrived this week