Should I write on my registry page that guests should feel free to split expensive gifts?

[Deleted User]

We have about 10 out of 65 items on our registry that are $100-$300 (the rest are under $100). My fiance's family will likely not be able to individually spend 200-300, and so he feels obligated to write in a kind of "preface" to the registry links on our website that we have chosen some expensive gifts that will be meaningful and useful to us, and that we know will last a lifetime, and that guests should feel free to split such gifts. I feel that that's kind of awkward to say outright, and should then be accompanied by a statement that people need not give gifts at all, but really what I wanted to do was write nothing, just have the registry links without a statement on our website. 

So- Has anyone ever let people know in writing that they should feel free to split gifts? Is it common knowledge that splitting is expected when expensive gifts are included? 

Thank you!

mikenberger

cs887 said:

We have about 10 out of 65 items on our registry that are $100-$300 (the rest are under $100). My fiance's family will likely not be able to individually spend 200-300, and so he feels obligated to write in a kind of "preface" to the registry links on our website that we have chosen some expensive gifts that will be meaningful and useful to us, and that we know will last a lifetime, and that guests should feel free to split such gifts. I feel that that's kind of awkward to say outright, and should then be accompanied by a statement that people need not give gifts at all, but really what I wanted to do was write nothing, just have the registry links without a statement on our website. 

So- Has anyone ever let people know in writing that they should feel free to split gifts? Is it common knowledge that splitting is expected when expensive gifts are included? 

Thank you!

Does your FI think that your guests don't know that they can split the costs of gifts? Like they're ignorant or something? I'd be pretty annoyed if I saw that on a registry. It's also pretty presumptuous of your FI to want to put something like that on the registry. You don't instruct people on how to pay for your gifts.

lyndausvi

Fairly certain guests know this already.

chibiyui

Nope.

huskypuppy14

If people want to split gifts, they will. There really shouldn't be any notes about gifts from the bride and groom, because gifts shouldn't be expected. 

If someone can't afford something in the higher price points, and they want to give a gift, they will buy one of the other 55 gifts.

Also, people might not buy the more expensive gifts at all. No one bought the kitchen aid mixer off my registry, so I bought it myself after the wedding.

esstee33

If you want your guests to feel like you view them as idiots who can't manage their own finances, then you should definitely put this on your website.

No? I thought not.

levioosa

Ew, no.  Your FI is wrong.  That will come off looking incredibly gift grabby.  If they don't want to spend that much, they will either buy one of the other 55 cheaper gifts, forgo a gift, give you money, or split it.  People know how to manage their money for gifts.  

[Deleted User]

Thank you all for your comments! And for letting me know I haven't lost touch with reality

[Deleted User]

If I didn't feel inspired to get you any of the gifts in my price range and I knew my sister was also invited to your wedding, I'd call her up and ask her how much she was planning on giving you and whether she wanted to split gifting the awesome *whatever I think is awesome* on your registry.  Tell FI his relatives aren't dumb and will figure out how to do this as well.

thisismynickname2

I know this was marked as "answered" but I'll just say, I've actually seen this done, and it's rubbed me very much the wrong way each time. Instead of being considerate, it comes across as a plea for people to buy you the actual expensive stuff- very gift grabby. It's pretty much the opposite effect you're going for.