Buzzfeed - worst thing at a wedding

lovesclimbing

Oh, Buzzfeed.  This has just a few gifs of weddings gone awry and then asks people to comment with their own worst stories.  Oh the comments, I am dying.  And the gif of the little boy THROWING the ring bearer pillow is just too good.

http://www.buzzfeed.com/juliegerstein/whats-the-worst-thing-youve-ever-witnessed-at-a-wedding

anrforanr

This one takes the cake for sure....

My husband and I attended an outdoor wedding at a public park in town. When we arrived the police and coroner's van was there (surrounded by the wedding guests). Apparently a homeless man had sought shelter behind the lattice surrounding the bottom of the gazebo floor and had DIED several days before. It was June in Missouri. The stench was horrible! So...they proceed to move the wedding to a field on the OTHER side of the park and although everyone was shook-up they decided to proceed. The preacher was in the middle of the vows and one of the groomsmen interrupts and says "John, I'm sorry but you can't marry Sherilynn. I love her and she's pregnant with my baby." Wow. Then the groom proceeds to yell at his bride (not)-to-be that she was a cheap w*#re, how could you do this to me blah blah blah...and then one of the guests STANDS UP and yells at the groom "Serves you right, you bastard! You've been screwing my sister for a year!" Yep. We left. As we were driving down the road (pretty much shocked into silence) I turned to my husband and said "You know, I've always wanted to attend a wedding where something like that happens." My husband, completely serious, replied "Which part? The dead hobo or the Jerry Springer Special waiting to happen?" Aaahhh, small-town living.

novella1186

can't.... stop..... READING!

jacques27

How is that ring bearer throwing the pillow in the "worst thing" pile?  That has to be one of the best things.  And I'm totally picturing that pillow toss was also accompanied by a little toddler voice saying "What the eff is this outfit you put on me?  Screw this!" *throws pillow*

goblue111315

anrforanr said:

This one takes the cake for sure....

My husband and I attended an outdoor wedding at a public park in town. When we arrived the police and coroner's van was there (surrounded by the wedding guests). Apparently a homeless man had sought shelter behind the lattice surrounding the bottom of the gazebo floor and had DIED several days before. It was June in Missouri. The stench was horrible! So...they proceed to move the wedding to a field on the OTHER side of the park and although everyone was shook-up they decided to proceed. The preacher was in the middle of the vows and one of the groomsmen interrupts and says "John, I'm sorry but you can't marry Sherilynn. I love her and she's pregnant with my baby." Wow. Then the groom proceeds to yell at his bride (not)-to-be that she was a cheap w*#re, how could you do this to me blah blah blah...and then one of the guests STANDS UP and yells at the groom "Serves you right, you bastard! You've been screwing my sister for a year!" Yep. We left. As we were driving down the road (pretty much shocked into silence) I turned to my husband and said "You know, I've always wanted to attend a wedding where something like that happens." My husband, completely serious, replied "Which part? The dead hobo or the Jerry Springer Special waiting to happen?" Aaahhh, small-town living.

What a train wreck!  The terrible part of me would love to witness something like that...

Vivandiere8

Wow... I thought I had heard the worst horror stories on here but some of these are just jaw dropping!

[Deleted User]

charcoalandblush

"I work at the front desk of a hotel spa that serves as a wedding venue. Once, a woman from the bridal party walks up to me holding a medium sized towel. She gives me a strange look like I should be doing something, so i extend my hands out. She delicately hands me the towel and exasperatedly says "thank you." Looking at the towel, I see that there is a large slash of poop on said towel. In horror, I run in back. My manager sees the look on my face and casually asks "poop towel?"... So yeah, poop towels are apparently a thing at weddings."

Ummmm WHAT?

SCbride007

charcoalandblush said:

"I work at the front desk of a hotel spa that serves as a wedding venue. Once, a woman from the bridal party walks up to me holding a medium sized towel. She gives me a strange look like I should be doing something, so i extend my hands out. She delicately hands me the towel and exasperatedly says "thank you." Looking at the towel, I see that there is a large slash of poop on said towel. In horror, I run in back. My manager sees the look on my face and casually asks "poop towel?"... So yeah, poop towels are apparently a thing at weddings."

Ummmm WHAT?

I really want to know why there was a poop towel. I am hoping that someone was trying to change a baby on said towel or something and that it wasn't a drunken bridal party accident. 

ohannabelle

SCbride007 said:

charcoalandblush said:

"I work at the front desk of a hotel spa that serves as a wedding venue. Once, a woman from the bridal party walks up to me holding a medium sized towel. She gives me a strange look like I should be doing something, so i extend my hands out. She delicately hands me the towel and exasperatedly says "thank you." Looking at the towel, I see that there is a large slash of poop on said towel. In horror, I run in back. My manager sees the look on my face and casually asks "poop towel?"... So yeah, poop towels are apparently a thing at weddings."

Ummmm WHAT?

I really want to know why there was a poop towel. I am hoping that someone was trying to change a baby on said towel or something and that it wasn't a drunken bridal party accident. 

What the hell? What does this mean? Poop towel? 

FiancB

@novella1186 you'll have to come back to the comments and add whatever shenanigans Brad and your sister come up with. 

The ring bearer cracked me up. We went to a wedding where the couple had a small child that was the flower girl. She got up to the altar and looked out at all the people staring at her and started crying hysterically. It was pretty funny, and pretty standard for a 3-year-old. 

My flower girl was instructed to hand out flowers and forgot til the end of her aisle walk and then tried to go back.  I'm glad that happened- it made me laugh, so I have pictures of me walking down the aisle smiling and looking nice and happy instead of terrified. 

As far as worst wedding, I know of two weddings where actual or threatened stabbings occurred. Knives as groomsmen gifts aren't a great idea. 

anrforanr

goblue111315 said:

anrforanr said:

This one takes the cake for sure....

My husband and I attended an outdoor wedding at a public park in town. When we arrived the police and coroner's van was there (surrounded by the wedding guests). Apparently a homeless man had sought shelter behind the lattice surrounding the bottom of the gazebo floor and had DIED several days before. It was June in Missouri. The stench was horrible! So...they proceed to move the wedding to a field on the OTHER side of the park and although everyone was shook-up they decided to proceed. The preacher was in the middle of the vows and one of the groomsmen interrupts and says "John, I'm sorry but you can't marry Sherilynn. I love her and she's pregnant with my baby." Wow. Then the groom proceeds to yell at his bride (not)-to-be that she was a cheap w*#re, how could you do this to me blah blah blah...and then one of the guests STANDS UP and yells at the groom "Serves you right, you bastard! You've been screwing my sister for a year!" Yep. We left. As we were driving down the road (pretty much shocked into silence) I turned to my husband and said "You know, I've always wanted to attend a wedding where something like that happens." My husband, completely serious, replied "Which part? The dead hobo or the Jerry Springer Special waiting to happen?" Aaahhh, small-town living.

What a train wreck!  The terrible part of me would love to witness something like that...

Right? I was telling my parents about it at lunch, and we just couldn't believe something like that would actually happen!

anrforanr

FiancB said:

@novella1186 you'll have to come back to the comments and add whatever shenanigans Brad and your sister come up with. 

The ring bearer cracked me up. We went to a wedding where the couple had a small child that was the flower girl. She got up to the altar and looked out at all the people staring at her and started crying hysterically. It was pretty funny, and pretty standard for a 3-year-old. 

My flower girl was instructed to hand out flowers and forgot til the end of her aisle walk and then tried to go back.  I'm glad that happened- it made me laugh, so I have pictures of me walking down the aisle smiling and looking nice and happy instead of terrified. 

As far as worst wedding, I know of two weddings where actual or threatened stabbings occurred. Knives as groomsmen gifts aren't a great idea. 

I think we need to hear the stories of why the stabbings were happening...if it's not too traumatizing 

ShesSoCold

Omg this guy -

"Worst wedding: the grooms 8 year-old son was the ring bearer. During the wedding party introductions at the reception he asked several times to be excused to go to the bathroom. After being told to wait several times he had a bout of massive diarrhea all in and on his tuxedo in front of all his family and friends.

I was that boy. I did not survive (socially)."

Cookie Pusher

FiancB said:

@novella1186 you'll have to come back to the comments and add whatever shenanigans Brad and your sister come up with. 

The ring bearer cracked me up. We went to a wedding where the couple had a small child that was the flower girl. She got up to the altar and looked out at all the people staring at her and started crying hysterically. It was pretty funny, and pretty standard for a 3-year-old. 

My flower girl was instructed to hand out flowers and forgot til the end of her aisle walk and then tried to go back.  I'm glad that happened- it made me laugh, so I have pictures of me walking down the aisle smiling and looking nice and happy instead of terrified. 

As far as worst wedding, I know of two weddings where actual or threatened stabbings occurred. Knives as groomsmen gifts aren't a great idea. 

We gave really nice pocket knives to our guys! The only person who got hurt was BIL who slashed his finger cutting open one of the helium balloons at the end of the night (yes, we were inhaling helium and making funny voices on the shuttle back to the hotel... obviously, we're all 10).

FiancB

anrforanr said:

FiancB said:

@novella1186 you'll have to come back to the comments and add whatever shenanigans Brad and your sister come up with. 

The ring bearer cracked me up. We went to a wedding where the couple had a small child that was the flower girl. She got up to the altar and looked out at all the people staring at her and started crying hysterically. It was pretty funny, and pretty standard for a 3-year-old. 

My flower girl was instructed to hand out flowers and forgot til the end of her aisle walk and then tried to go back.  I'm glad that happened- it made me laugh, so I have pictures of me walking down the aisle smiling and looking nice and happy instead of terrified. 

As far as worst wedding, I know of two weddings where actual or threatened stabbings occurred. Knives as groomsmen gifts aren't a great idea. 

I think we need to hear the stories of why the stabbings were happening...if it's not too traumatizing 

One was actually my great grandfather back in Finland. I think he may have actually killed the guy. Apparently it was some big shameful family secret that I didn't hear about until recently but it was a long time/a few generations soo?

The other was a wedding my roommate was in. One of the groomsmen got really drunk and angry about something and started threatening one of the other groomsmen. I forget what it was about, but... not something that warranted pulling a knife on someone. 

melbenso

While I certainly don't agree with all of these, this one was pretty funny:

"I feel like I've been waiting my whole life for someone to ask this. I
used to work at a fairly popular venue in a small, southern city, and
here are some important and often overlooked tips (gleaned from real
life weddings) for having your perfect wedding:

1. Is it a
good idea to have a backup best man in case your first choice gets
busted and goes to jail before your big day? Yes. Maybe even have
*two* backups.

2. Parent/offspring dances aren't just for
fathers and daughters! You can have a mother/son dance as well, and it
won't make anyone uncomfortable if the song you choose is "Hero" by
Enrique Ig..le..si..?? Fuck it. Enrique Iguana. Don't dance with your
kids to Enrique Iguana.

3. If the pastor is dressed like a
member of your high school marching band, he might repeatedly ask you to
steal candy for him and you should probably do it.


4. To the white brides of interracial couples: If your obscenely
racist father (who - I swear to God - looks exactly like Colonel
Sanders) doesn't know his future son in law is black, the *best* time
for him to find out is *at the wedding.* This tip is surprisingly
legit; that was one of the most outrageously fun weddings I've ever been
to. Everyone got wasted and the pastor kept asking me to steal candy.)


5. If the bride has to go to the bathroom and asks if you could keep
an eye on her mother and to "make sure she doesn't 'drop it low,'" you
already know where her mother is and it is much too late to take
preventative action. Don't even bother.

6. Always - *always* -
have an open bar. I had this one guy hang out with me at the bar for
hours, getting drunker and drunker, and another guy came up to get a
drink. He was painfully tall, jarringly thin, and he kept smiling this
wide-eyed, unblinking smile. When he left, the drunk guy was visibly
creeped out and kept mumbling, "motherfucker looked like some shit out
of a goddamn scary movie." Everyone needs a line like that.

7.
And finally, a serious one: We had one wedding where one of the
guests had Tourette's. I don't know if he was worried about ruining
anything - he had a great sense of humor about it - but the way his
family handled it to make him feel better was really pretty sweet.


Before the ceremony and reception, he wrote down a few inappropriate
things he planned to yell at certain moments. All the guests got cards
and pencils and were welcome to guess which outbursts were real and
which were premeditated. At the end of the night, the scores were
tallied up and the winner got a prize. I loved it."

thisismynickname2

Did you see the one about the flower girl who barfed on her dress so they replaced her?

novella1186

thisismynickname said:

Did you see the one about the flower girl who barfed on her dress so they replaced her?

Gah! I missed that one. I was a little disturbed by the one about the bride who was going around barfing into random cups and then putting them back on the tables, though. If that's not rock bottom.... 

[Deleted User]

novella1186

pinkrevenge said:

novella1186 said:

thisismynickname said:

Did you see the one about the flower girl who barfed on her dress so they replaced her?

Gah! I missed that one. I was a little disturbed by the one about the bride who was going around barfing into random cups and then putting them back on the tables, though. If that's not rock bottom.... 

That one absolutely made me gag.

I had a guy get mad at me after my wedding because I popped downstairs to meet some people, he wanted to buy me a drink, and I said it was sweet but I was sticking to water at that point.
How dare I not take his drink offer!

You shoulda just yelled, "It's MY day!"