Wedding Woes

Am I the only one concerned about this?...

prettypixelzprettypixelz member
Second Anniversary 10 Comments 5 Love Its
edited March 2015 in Wedding Woes
How am I gonna get everyone to dance? I REALLY wanted a fun, lively wedding. I LOVE music. And even though I NEVER dance, I wanna really let loose and show off my crappy dance moves on my wedding day because why the hell not?! But I feel like dancing by myself or with my fiancee (who can't dance very well either) is a waste of a good DJ. But I know my family, and I've heard a lot about his, and they are not dancing folk. At all. :( I mean, it's okay if everybody dances like they have two left feet and no rhythm, just so long as they DANCE!

Re: Am I the only one concerned about this?...

  • Here's the thing:  People aren't going to magically become something they're not just because you want it and it's your wedding.  If they aren't dancing folk, they aren't dancing folk.  My best advice overall is if you want to dance, get on out there and have fun even if you're the only ones out there and a few people will probably follow suit - but if they don't, don't sweat it.

    Most of the weddings I've been to recently have been dance duds.  I don't particularly enjoy dancing myself (never a club person in my younger days), but at a wedding, I sure as hell am getting out there if there is music and a dance floor (minimum of two drinks required though).  Usually it's just a couple of kids, then I get out there and drag a few people with me and that's it.  I just don't hang with a dancing crowd it seems.  The couple of weddings I've attended that did have most people up and dancing had a few common threads:

    1)  Live band or very good DJ - I know people try to get by cheap with an iPod playlist or a "friend" who does this on the side or used to do it, but they've usually been spectacular failures when it comes to getting a crowd dancing.  It's fine if you just want music for ambiance, but I think it's crucial to have a live person who is a) charismatic, b ) engaging, and c) able to read the room and adjust accordingly.  If dancing is truly important to you, I think researching your options and not skimping is important here.

    2)  Alcohol - Most people I know need a drink or two in them to lower their inhibitions a bit and not feel self-conscious about dancing in front of people.  Now this certainly isn't required - people can have fun and dance with out it (one of the best dancing weddings I went to was a dry wedding - but they also had a ridiculously fun live band and the groom was just the sort of happy Hawaiian shirt wearing always crackin' a joke kind of guy that we all went in wearing our dancing shoes from the get go).  However, since you "NEVER" dance, my guess is most people will probably assume a more reserved approach - alcohol would probably be helpful.

    Mostly, don't worry.  You can't force people and you'll suck the enjoyment out of it if you worry or try to force it.  If it happens, it happens.  If it doesn't, then you get on out there and enjoy dancing with your new husband and the few people who do join you.
  • we had 2 DJs with 2 assistants that really worked the crowd - they sang and danced and really got the group up and going. All of our friends were in their early-mid 20s, but most of our guests were middle-aged/elderly family and family friends. everyone was having such a good time that we ended up extending the reception by an hour. 

    I'd say just get up and dance and have fun - you can't force people, but if people are having a good time, it's usually contagious.   
  • If you're dancing and having a good time, people will join you two on the dance floor. No need to stress.


  • 6fsn6fsn member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its Name Dropper

    Agreed with PP.  If you are out there having fun, others will follow.

  • Why are you so concerned with what other people do?  If you want to dance, then by all means.  I hope you have a great time.  But let your guests do what they want to.  Protip:  not everyone likes all the same things you do.
  • I agree with the ladies. If you are dancing, then other people will join you. Not everyone, but enough to make it fun. I would look over your playlist for the DJ and make sure you have songs that will get people on their feet based on your crowd and their ages.

  • Any chance that they're more the polka and Chicken Dance types or the slow dance type?  You never know depending on your family that if you first start with where they're at they're likely to get out there when it's familiar types of music..  OTOH, I suck at dancing and DH is the anti-dancer to the point that we didn't even make it through our first dance and nothing is going to change that.    

    What about doing something like asking everyone to surround you in a big area around the dance floor then going straight from your first dance into something that'll first get all the kids out there dancing and branch into the adults by firing up the dancing.  Talk to your DJ, a good one when given flexibility will read and work your crowd will get them out to the floor. (just be prepared that you may end up with some interesting songs on the play list...)

  • To get everyone out on the dance floor I had everyone come out for a group picture (which came out fantastic and I'm so glad I did), and then played "Happy" by Pharell. Everyone started jumping around and dancing, even my 85 year old grandmother! The rest of the night the dance floor was on and off with people but we filled it for that first song and it was a lot of fun!
  • everyone started dancing when "poison" by bell biv devoe came on. 

  • mrsconn23mrsconn23 member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    edited March 2015
    The best thing I've ever seen was my very uptight aunt getting her groove on to "Save a Horse Ride a Cowboy" at my sister's wedding.
  • You guys are awesome. :) Thank you for all the support and suggestions. :P I think I will hire an awesome DJ and a decent bartender. That oughta loosen up the family. And like you all said, even if in the end I am the ONLY one dancing, at least I had fun.
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