Monday...blah

mrsconn23

How was the weekend?

Ours was pretty good.  Saturday was the party and it was fun.  It was cold, but sunny.  The kids were outside most of the time.  DefConn had a great day celebrating. 

Yesterday, we were so lazy.  We got a little cleaning up done, but for the most part we just laid around.  

This article made me think of @heffalump and @pmeg819 :  http://www.stuffmomssay.com/2015/03/dear-husband-youre-not-dying-you-have.html

Heffalump

Happy birthday (party), DefConn! 

LOL at that article.  Although, in fairness, when I got whatever really nasty bug we all had last time around, DH did pretty much take over.  But for sure, whenever he gets a cold, it's 50% "I'm dyyyying" and 50% "no thanks, I don't want to take anything."

I want more weekend.  We were busy but had so much fun.  Soccer was effing freezing Saturday, they actually let the kids play the second half in their winter coats.  DD had a playdate, which I was going to use to clean up the kitchen after making like three different things for dinner this week.  But DH was out laptop shopping, and DS was pushing his trike around and whimpering to go outside.  So we went for a long walk/ride outside, and by the time we got back, it was time to pick up DD so she could get ready for swim.  And when I got back from that, DH was home...and cleaning up my mess. 

Went out for hibachi Saturday night, and DS ate all my fried rice.  Looks like he's getting his own entree next time.  DD was pretty insistent that she order sushi, DH was skeptical, but we told her to go for it.  She hardly touched her nigiri but ate most of her roll, and DH was happy to hoover up the rest of her nigiri.  DS did really well with the big fireball, but then afterward, whenever something sizzled, he leaned into me and held onto my sleeve.  Just in case.

DS woke up ragey yesterday, and we were afraid he was coming down with something.  He had his hand in his mouth, so I dosed him with Tylenol, and he was like a new kid.  Now we are afraid that he's starting on his two year molars, because all his other teeth are in.  Eff molars, y'all.

Since he was in much better spirits, we headed for the zoo.  It was cool, but otherwise nice, and we had a great time.  DD was all about taking pictures with my phone, and was bitterly disappointed that she missed the monkey peeing off a tree by mere seconds.  ("I just wasn't fast enough!")  DS was having a hard time, because he had no concept of "Let's leave this thing and go see a different thing."  So every time we moved on, it was a struggle:  he raged when we left the flamingos, until he saw the koi; he launched a mini-tantrum when we left the koi, until he saw the penguins, etc.  By the time we left, his brain was full, and both kids slept most of the way home. 

VarunaTT

Saturday we got up and cooked the food for the campaign from my atheist group.  It ended up being more "brunch" time b/c our timing was a bit off, but everything worked out spectacularly.  We received a bunch of notes from the workers, full of happiness and food.  One of my members was phone banking that day and said our group was all the talk for bringing food to the hungry masses.    We're debating taking some brown bag lunches in during the week and we're doing lasagna for them next weekend.  I'm ready for this election to be over.  

The rest of the day we just lazed around.  I finished reading, "Wild" by Cheryl Strayed and I recommend it.  Really enjoyed it.

Sunday we cleaned the house really well.  The roofers finished our roof and it's beautiful and it's done right and we don't have to worry about leaky spots for the next 20 years!  Onto the bathroom remodel!

Sunday night, we went to a community concert that was held for our side of the campaign.  It was magnificent.  I finally got to hear Samuel Barber's Adagio for Strings played live.  The singers were all really lovely.  I hope the campaign workers got a needed lift and re-dedication, I remember how hard that shit is to take, day after day, especially in this last week.  Also, I was so proud.  My new atheist group?  Members did the following:  the 2 main organizers of the concert, the sign language interpreter, one of the community singers, one of the players in the brass ensemble, a quilt that was auctioned off for close to $200 was made by a member, and there were 6 of us in attendance just to be there from my group.  I was incredibly proud and humbled to be part of this organization.  It's become exactly what I wanted when i was looking for a secular community and I'm so much happier here.

When the concert was over and we were helping break things down, I was helping collect money.  A large group of older ladies walked past me, smiling, and telling me thank you.  All of a sudden, to my surprise, a wash of grief came over me.  I realized that I was missing my mentor who died a few years ago.  She would've been all over this campaign, donating money, volunteering, and so proud that her community was stepping up to protect groups of people that she cared so deeply about.  It passed, but left me rather drained for the rest of the evening.  

So, all in all, a good weekend.  

6fsn

Saturday was blah. Yesterday my folks came over and my mom sliced her hand with scissors 45 mins and 6 stitches and we were home

Right now I'm sitting in a parking lot in Cincinnati. I'm supposed to meet my boss at 11 but it's only 1030. I feel like a dumbass because I forgot my computer and log book. Of course I don't even know what I'm doing here for 3 hours except they are paying me

It's going to be a long spring break

0Face

Weekend was fun with a huge side helping of "for the LOVE OF EVERYTHING HOLY!".

My gma was surprised by a huge family gathering for her 90th birthday.  So it was great in that I got to see family that I haven't seen in years...I'm talking maybe 10+ for a cousin, and reconnecting with other cousins that are awesome.  I have a pretty great family.  I'm happy. 

The crappy part relates to my inability to talk about important things, and bring them up.  I feel I have valid excuses for holding back (but all H hears are excuses) so in the interim it's horribly tense, I feel horribly sad that I disappointed him---but I'm not giving up and I'll just have to bite the bullet and stay up late one night and say "HEY, I did what you asked!" and then if he decides it's "not a good time" I'll say "but you told me EXPLICITLY".  So there is that...I can only follow directions because at this point I feel like I get misdirected a lot.

VarunaTT

O-face is your DH willing to go to therapy with you?  Or do you discuss how to communicate w/him in therapy?  Invasive, so tell me to MYOB.  Communication is difficult for everyone; it's also both people's responsibilities.  It often sounds like you're trying multiple ways and he's continuing to shut things off to the side, with various excuses about how/why you didn't do it right/timing, etc. 

0Face

Psss---V I'm pretty much an open book.

I did ask him and he said "I don't really want to" which made me say "okayyyyy?".  And I haven't followed up. 

I'm not making excuses for his behavior---at all.  The reality of it is: I'm a blame accepter, I am an escapist when it comes to things that make me uncomfortable so in all reality during difficult times my tendency is to up and disappear, not physically but mentally.  I think H expects a lot from me, some things that I cannot give him right now, and vice versa.  But neither of us is willing to just say "welp, that didn't work" and walk away.

It's just hard because whenever he says "I'm very upset that you've failed to talk to me about something the last 10 weeks" which is true, all I hear is "FAIL FAIL FAILLLL" and I don't absorb anything else. 

So to sum it up, I haven't pushed the issue of communication, and until I get a handle on my issues alone for awhile (I like my alone time) I won't.  But I know it's not a dead one...and I keep thinking about it....ugh.  See?  Avoid avoid avoid.  Not good.  *welcome to my brain*

PMeg819

Hello. I am soooooo bored. I have so little work to do and what I have to do is just painfully boring or tedious things so I'm putting it off.

The weekend was okay. I was crabby from bad sleep which was mostly my own fault as I didn't go to bed early. DS had his first swim lessons, loved it, and the teacher said that at the end he'll be ready to move on. She asked why I didn't put him in the level above and I explained that it was due to their flowsheet. Which I was then told was incorrect. Whatever. There is only one other kid in the class with him so he gets a lot of one on one attention which is nice. DD is finally getting her canine teeth in (she has all the rest minus her molars) and of course is doing all 4 at once. On Friday, I went and got some new clothes for her and I picked her up a pair of pink jelly sandals. She is obsessed with them. From the time she woke up to the time she goes to bed she wears them. It's cute.

I read that article- I'll have to  make a separate post about DH's recent medical ailments.

VarunaTT

Oh, I don't think you should ditch him or anything.  I just wondered b/c it seems like you've been working really hard and it seemed like he kinda wasn't?  I do realize that we all tell stories in our own way too, so that's why I asked.  As long as you're satisfied with the status quo, it's good.