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Question on Restaurant Reception

Hi Everyone,

My FI and I are having our reception at a restaurant.  We are super excited about this, and we found a venue that we absolutely fell in love with!!  :)  Since the majority of our guests are traveling into town for our wedding (almost 90%!!), we decided to treat them to one of the best steak houses in the area.  We are having a limited menu for all of our guests to keep costs in check as much as possible.  We are having appetizers, soup and salad, entrees with sides, and dessert.  But it will just be of a limited selection. 

Situation: I was recently visiting some of my family.  One person I do not like (but is invited) commented that the place was really expensive, and she couldn't wait to try it!!  I said great, and glad she is looking forward to it!!  Then she pulls up the menu on her phone, and starts listing off things she wants to try.  I said - oh, I don't want you to be disappointed on our wedding day, but we will be having a limited menu.  She said - it's a restaurant, I can order anything I want.

Question: Is it okay to tell the restaurant manager, that if someone wants to order extra items that are not on our limited menu, then that will be on their dime?  

Thanks for your input!!

Re: Question on Restaurant Reception

  • Hi Everyone,


    My FI and I are having our reception at a restaurant.  We are super excited about this, and we found a venue that we absolutely fell in love with!!  :)  Since the majority of our guests are traveling into town for our wedding (almost 90%!!), we decided to treat them to one of the best steak houses in the area.  We are having a limited menu for all of our guests to keep costs in check as much as possible.  We are having appetizers, soup and salad, entrees with sides, and dessert.  But it will just be of a limited selection. 

    Situation: I was recently visiting some of my family.  One person I do not like (but is invited) commented that the place was really expensive, and she couldn't wait to try it!!  I said great, and glad she is looking forward to it!!  Then she pulls up the menu on her phone, and starts listing off things she wants to try.  I said - oh, I don't want you to be disappointed on our wedding day, but we will be having a limited menu.  She said - it's a restaurant, I can order anything I want.

    Question: Is it okay to tell the restaurant manager, that if someone wants to order extra items that are not on our limited menu, then that will be on their dime?  

    Thanks for your input!!
    Is the reception going to be in the main dining room, with a big table, or do you have a back party room? If it is the later, you should express that the limited menu is the only thing guests can order off of for the event. Same if it is in the main hall, but I can see it being more difficult in this situation. I would express to the manager about this. I would just make it so guests can only get what you are offering, if that is possible.
    [Deleted User]
  • The reception is in a private back party room.  We even have a DJ and dance floor which we are excited about!!  

    I'm hoping that people stick to the limited menu....Would the restaurant servers request that guests stick to the limited menu?  Or how would that be made clear to the guests?  They won't be handed the main menu, and are separated from other diners.

  • I think your friend is being silly. You said she won't have the main menu, so I am guessing you guys are printing up a special menu with what you are offering. If she asks for something else, the waiter just says we are not offering that at this time.

     

    [Deleted User]
  • The reception is in a private back party room.  We even have a DJ and dance floor which we are excited about!!  


    I'm hoping that people stick to the limited menu....Would the restaurant servers request that guests stick to the limited menu?  Or how would that be made clear to the guests?  They won't be handed the main menu, and are separated from other diners.
    Make it clear to the manager, who by the nature of his/her job, would have to convey to the servers, that your guests are only to order off your limited menu. If a guest tries to order something different, the server will need to correct them and say they are only able to order off the menu in front of them.

    BTW, your reception sounds very fun!
    [Deleted User]
  • Thank you everyone for your quick and helpful replies!!  Yes, we are printing a limited menu selection.  I like both of your ideas of having the servers tell the guests that what they are requesting isn't being offered, and that they need to stick to the menu.  So much better than my original idea of having the guest order it and then pay for it themselves.  Ha.

    Thank you!!

    PS - I'm glad you think our reception sounds fun!!  :)  

  • Another vote for just having the servers so "I'm sorry but while that item is on our regular menu, we aren't able to provide that for this event, may I recommend trying the xxxx" Any guest that doesn't like that, well, they can go out to the regular resturant area, get a table & pay for their own dinner...lol. And if that is the case, I'll take their seat & gladly order off your limited menu.

    [Deleted User]
  • Thanks!!  This sounds perfect!!  She is the only one that has mentioned anything about ordering a lot of things to try.  Everyone else seemed very excited about eating there.

    What's funny is the person that wants to order a list of items is one of the few people that lives in our city.  I sent her an email a few months back, as the restaurant was having a special event for Valentine's Day, and they had a fantastic menu at a pretty good price, but she never responded.  We are not close at all.  That was my hint for her to go and eat there herself.  

    So glad to hear that others will be appreciative!!  :)

  • levioosalevioosa Southern California member
    5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I used to work at a restaurant, and occasionally we would have large parties with a limited menu.  Typically what would happen is a small specialty menu would be printed out and given to the party.  We would then go around and take their orders.  If they tried to order something off menu, we would let them know it was not available.  Some people would still go up to the bar and order a drink or different appetizer, but that made them the rude ones, not the hosts paying. 

    Speak to the manager and let him know your concerns.  The servers should know what to do as this probably isn't a foreign concept to them, especially if it is a popular restaurant like you have indicated. 


    image
    MairePoppy
  • What our daughter's First Communion site did was we had to do RSVP's ahead of time for each item on the menu with a menu selection then had to do place cards with each person's name and color coded to their meal of choice.  This was great - until you end up with people who have food allergies/sensitivities which brings a whole new element of "fun" to the situation. 

    IMO, drop it, and don't worry about it.  Obviously if you aren't making people choose on their RSVP then do the limited menu the night of, any deviations (I.e. adding mushrooms to their steak) are on the guests' own dime.  It's annoying as heck as this happened with DD & DS' Birthday recently, we ordered a wide variety of food to accommodate everyone's preferences (granted, this was not even close to a Steak Restaurant), only for some (family) guests to show up, order entire meals for themselves, hence we had a ton of food leftover and paid for drinks that no one drank.  But while aggravating, there's only so much you can do when people are like that, if they're paying for it with their dime and not yours, take a deep breath and relax.  I'm sure the site has dealt with this type of thing before.

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  • levioosa said:

    I used to work at a restaurant, and occasionally we would have large parties with a limited menu.  Typically what would happen is a small specialty menu would be printed out and given to the party.  We would then go around and take their orders.  If they tried to order something off menu, we would let them know it was not available.  Some people would still go up to the bar and order a drink or different appetizer, but that made them the rude ones, not the hosts paying. 

    Speak to the manager and let him know your concerns.  The servers should know what to do as this probably isn't a foreign concept to them, especially if it is a popular restaurant like you have indicated. 

    We had a party at a restaurant once and they did this for us as well. The menu that was given to all of our guests was the limited menu, so there was no confusion about what was available.
    MesmrEwe
  • thisismynickname2thisismynickname2 City By The Lake member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    I had my wedding at a restaurant with private dining. There were three entree options, so I just did like most other weddings and put the choices on the RSVP card. Now, my restaurant required advanced orders and it sounds like yours does tableside, but maybe putting the choices on the RSVP card will help anyway. Just a thought.

    It also sounds like this friend is a bit dim, because I cannot imagine people being handed a limited menu and thinking they have the option for any other menu. I've been to plenty of events like that and nobody bats an eye. 
    ________________________________


  • Jen4948Jen4948 Houston member
    10000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    I agree with making clear to the restaurant staff that they need to make clear to the guests that only the items on the limited menu will be available. If a guest like this person tries to order something that the restaurant normally serves but isn't on your limited menu, the staff should tell that person, "I'm sorry, but only the items on this (the limited) menu are available for order." If that guest complains, s/he is being rude.
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