New chat on splitting holidays

Jen4948

RebeccaFlower said:

I told both sets of families that if they made us feel guilty for our choices, then we'd be staying home for all holidays. 

I love this course of action.

drunkenwitch

My BFF's exhusband used to demand that every Thanksgiving and every Christmas must be spent with his family because of the unbreakable traditions that would cause the sky to fall if they were ever missed. She barely got to spend time with her family iver the holidays and that led to a lot of resentment. This wasn't the only reason for the divorce but it was a pretty big factor.

I'm not trashing your family's traditions, just warning you to be careful, if you don't compromise it could lead to bitter feelings from your DH and his family.

VerizonGirl

I realize that most of you want to make some kind of "attached at the hip" statement of you and DH now being a MARRIED COUPLE.  But DH and I have no problem spending holidays with our respective families.  I'm an only child, so if DH and I don't host the holiday dinner, then I spend a couple of days with mom, and DH - who might as well be an only child because his brother never visits the parents on holidays - drives two hours to spend a couple of days with his parents.  This is actually pretty fun for us to be with our elderly, not-well, parents by ourselves... 

banana468

VerizonGirl said:

I realize that most of you want to make some kind of "attached at the hip" statement of you and DH now being a MARRIED COUPLE.  But DH and I have no problem spending holidays with our respective families.  I'm an only child, so if DH and I don't host the holiday dinner, then I spend a couple of days with mom, and DH - who might as well be an only child because his brother never visits the parents on holidays - drives two hours to spend a couple of days with his parents.  This is actually pretty fun for us to be with our elderly, not-well, parents by ourselves... 

This post does make sense of it works for you. For me, I don't want to spend the holidays away from my husband and if you ever have kids ( as we do now) your solution doesn't solve the argument.