Moms and Maids

MOH Toast

I'm MOH in a wedding next weekend (bride is my sister). She asked me the other day if I am "giving a speech" at the wedding. To be honest, I hadn't even thought about it since this wedding is the last thing on my mind given everything else I have going on.

There's no way I can get out of it, so it looks like I have to give a toast. However, I really want to avoid all the things we hate about bridal party toasts - inside jokes, attempts at humor that fall flat, making people cringe, etc.

I'm not the most sentimental gal out there (I'm the snarkymaid for a reason), so I really don't know where to start. Anyone have any ideas? Things you liked about toasts made in your honor or toasts you made to other people? 
KnotRiley

Re: MOH Toast

  • climbingsingleclimbingsingle NYC 'burbs member
    Ninth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    The best toasts IMO are ones that are short and come from the heart. I agree to skip over any private jokes. My MOH's toast was really sweet and made me cry. She basically told me how much she cares for me, how much it meant to her to be there that day, and what she wished for our future. 
    bumbletiger88PrettyGirlLost
  • Maggie0829Maggie0829 Ravens & Bohs & Crabs & O's member
    Eighth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    "Sis, I love you so much.  I am so happy that you have found someone that makes you smile, laugh, and who loves you to the moon and back.  Congratulations.  To Sally and Harry!"

    Really all you need is something short and sweet.

    But if you truly do not want to give a toast then tell your sister that.  My sister and I were MOHs for each others weddings.  We both hate public speaking with a vengeance so neither of us gave a toast.  No one that I know of questioned it or even missed it.

    poodledoodleoooOliveOilsMomPrettyGirlLost
  • The old formula is yawn worthy at best: state how long you've known each other, why you're close, a story from childhood, insert an inside joke or two, "then she met so-and-so", an inside jokes about her and her new spouse, get real sentimental about happiness and futures (maybe shed a tear), then close out with a super emotional hug. Take 10+ minutes to do all this. Bonus points if you read from an iPhone or a piece of paper. Extra special bonus points if you're drunk. And unicorn bonus points if you reveal something embarrassing about the bride/groom/couple......

    YAWNNNNN!!!!

    The best "speeches" (toasts) are about 2 minutes. They're short, they say how excited you are to be supporting this awesome couple on their wedding day, how happy you are that he makes her so happy, how glad you are that everyone there is supporting this happy couple and how you wish them the best future together. Those are toasts are by far superior to the rambling shit show described above.
    *********************************************************************************

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    poodledoodleooo[Deleted User]PrettyGirlLost
  • Public speaking isn't the issue - it's that I'm really just not great with expressing how I feel in a non-sarcastic tone. I'm not a sentimental person, but my sister very much is and she would be hurt if I didn't speak. While I don't really want to do it, it's not a hill I'm willing to die on if it will make her happy.
  • drunkenwitchdrunkenwitch member
    Eighth Anniversary 1000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    edited April 2015

    Thank the guests for being there, tell the happy couple they look radiant, say something "I have never seen sis as happy as she is today", welcome the groom to the family and wish them a lifetime of happiness.


    Formulaic, yes, but, I have seen people go way off the rails at wedding toasts because they wanted to be "witty" and "original, trust me short, nice and cliché is always better when it comes to toasts.

    poodledoodleooo[Deleted User]PrettyGirlLost
  • Keep in mind, it's supposed to be a toast, not a full-blown speech. You don't need to talk for long (nor should you) and you don't need to get sentimental or creative if it's not your thing. Just tell your sister how much you love her and how happy you are for her and her new husband, and wish them well. That's all you need to do.
    image
    [Deleted User]PrettyGirlLost
  • Maggie0829Maggie0829 Ravens & Bohs & Crabs & O's member
    Eighth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    edited April 2015

    Public speaking isn't the issue - it's that I'm really just not great with expressing how I feel in a non-sarcastic tone. I'm not a sentimental person, but my sister very much is and she would be hurt if I didn't speak. While I don't really want to do it, it's not a hill I'm willing to die on if it will make her happy.

    Then say what I suggested in my previous post.  Keep it to one sentence and be done.  The more you stress over what you are going to say the more you will be uncomfortable.  A quick I love you and congratulations is more then enough.

  • Find a quote that you really like and make that your starting point. Talk about how it relates to the bride and groom and you will find that a toast writes itself.

    When I was the MOH in a wedding, I actually improvised my speech. The bride was being a PITA and wanted a copy of my speech, so I didn't write one. I did competitive public speaking, debating and theatre all my life so a speech was NBD off the cuff. According to all the guests, it was the best speech they had heard at a wedding. 
  • OliveOilsMomOliveOilsMom South Jersey member
    Tenth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers

    My H & his brother are opposites, so he spoke of how they were opposites throughout life giving some quick examples.  Then he mentioned that the one big thing in common they had was that they both found the perfect person for them.  H then complimented the bride on how she calmed groom and was a good force in his life.  He wished them years of happiness.  Total was 1 minute.

    I was my sister's MOH.  So I spoke of how my sister always said she had a "type" of guy, but then she met a co-worker who started as a friend and then that friendship turned into a relationship with their first date at X.  Soon she was dating the guy who was against her "type".  Mentioned how BIL is great and that I was so happy he was a member of our family and making a point to say that sometime looking against type is when you find what you are looking for.  Again total time was 1 minute.

    While I don't have a fear of public speaking, I didn't want to move off topic so I did have my speech printed out on an index card.  I wanted to make sure I said my thoughts and ended the speech instead of potentially rambling on with no end point (which is what the best man did!). 

  • Thanks everyone! Short and sweet is something I can work with. I'll think about it closer to the day of, and let it just come organically - and keep it to one minute or less!
    [Deleted User]
  • one of our friends ended up giving a short, sweet and to the point irish blessing/toast. People really hate the ones that go on and on, the point is to get to the partying.
  • I agree...Short and sweet. I'm sure they have plenty of ideas on Pinterest but I would just say what's on your heart.
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