Wedding Customs & Traditions Forum

A Sibling Dance?

I have sort of an odd, non-traditional person walking me down the aisle. My future brother-in-law is going to be doing me this honor, and in place of the father-daughter dance, I wondered if I we could do a "sibling" dance. FI and I have been together for almost 10 years, and his younger brother got attached to me from the very beginning (he was only 4). I wondered if anyone else has had a similar situation, or any advice on some appropriate songs to use. I like Faith Hill "There You'll Be," but any other suggestions/advice is greatly appreciated :)

Re: A Sibling Dance?

  • mrscomposermrscomposer Mani-snow-ba member
    500 Love Its 500 Comments First Anniversary First Answer

    If your FBIL is already walking you down the aisle, I don't think I'd do a spotlight dance with him.  Dance with him, of course, and to There You'll Be, by all means, but I don't think it needs to be announced.  When it comes to spotlight dances, less is more - it's time that the people at your reception are just sitting and watching and likely bored.  If you dance with him later on in the evening, then other people can be dancing, too.

    FWIW, my little brother learned the Mr. Bean 'Mr. Boombastic' dance when he was really little, and has been entertaining us with it for years.  It's a bit of a tradition for it to get requested at weddings so that K'll do the dance.  My husband was the one who requested it at ours, and my sister and I danced it with him.  It turned into a bit of a spotlight thing, just because he is hilarious, and everyone on the dance floor was watching us - but we didn't announce anything about it.

    **The OMH formerly known as jsangel1018**
  • The fewer special dances, the better.
  • Yeah that makes sense
  • You might also combine it with the mother-son dance if you're doing that, and then it's sort of "family dance time." No announcement, but still in there.
  • I wouldn't.
    If you really take a look at traditional etiquette, what we call "the spotlight dance" (bride and groom take the floor alone) isn't really about being in the spotlight at all. It's really "the opening dance" and about letting the guests know that the dance floor is now open, and it's dancing time. 
    The fewer spotlights I have to sit through, the happier I am. I only enjoy the first one. 
  • CaitFinsCaitFins member
    25 Love Its Second Anniversary 10 Comments Name Dropper
    edited May 2015
    I think it would be nice. Yes, I would definitely limit special dances to two or three at most, but if this is taking the place of another traditional special dance, I think it's a great idea! I disagree that you shouldn't have it at all.

    My friend, the bride, danced with her younger sister (the sister was turning nine), alone on the dance floor at her wedding, and it was so special and sweet to watch. It was one of my favorite moments of the wedding, and definitely one of the most memorable, especially because it was out of the ordinary and we knew there was a lot of meaning in it for the bride. They danced to "Never Grow Up," by Taylor Swift. Obviously you and your FBIL have a very different story, but it sounds wonderful, and if I were a guest it certainly wouldn't detract from the wedding - I think it would add to it.

    IF you feel any concerns about the "entertaining" factor of the dance for guests, my recommendation would be to carefully choose the song. A song that is clearly reminiscent of you two's relationship or one that you two will really love or feel a connection in dancing to or will have fun with, rather than a quickly chosen generic one, is going to result in a more interesting dance for guests.

    Wedding Countdown Ticker

  • I say go for it. My dad died 6 years ago and I'm trying to figure out what I am going to do instead of the father-daughter dance. My older brother is walking me down the isle so I'm thinking about doing a dance with him and then at some point him handing me to my FFIL to finish the dance.  I'm all for non-traditional.
  • Sorry I haven't been on in awhile, just finished classes and have been studying hard for boards!! Thank you all for the input, I understand that most guests won't want to sit through 20 min of watching various "couples" go around in circles, it makes perfect sense to limit that sort of thing.
    On the flip side, FI and I have been talking about it, and with our first dance, and then his mother-son dance, we think it will probably be more appropriate to have me and his brother kick off the open dance floor with "Yeah" by Usher. I had forgotten that we danced to that song at his grandparent's 50th wedding anniversary when he was about 7 years old. We recently watched a video of that celebration and everyone was hysterical at watching us bumble around on the dance floor together!

    PS- we plan on taking some dance lessons that way we can do something a little more impressive than the high school prom waddle :-D
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