So this is my first post, but I've been lurking off and on for a few years now. My wedding is fast approaching and I need advice about a guest dilemma that has arisen.
First off, my wedding is June 17th. We are having a small, intimate ceremony with 15 of our closest family and friends at Walt Disney World. On July 11th, we are having a three hour drop in cake and punch party to celebrate with those that we love and care about. My bridal shower is this weekend, May 23rd.
My dilemma comes from the fact that I read that it is rude to invite someone to the the bridal shower, but not the wedding, or in our case, the party. My FI and I have been part of a young couples church group for many years and all of the women that I know from the class are invited to my bridal shower. All of the couples are then invited to the party in July.
The problem is that the bridal shower invitations were sent out and I (well, my friend that is throwing the party) invited all of these women, including one named Shannon. Shannon and her husband just joined the class in August after getting married, so we sorta know them, but not super well. We went ahead and invited them to the party though because this class is very close knit and it seemed rude to exclude them as the only couple not invited.
Fast forward to April. The invitations for my bridal shower were sent out and Shannon was invited. Her husband and her then separated after a massive blow out. Like, this couple cannot even be in the same room as each other from what I gather. He has to attend mandatory counseling for six months and is not allowed to have any contact with her at all and is only allowed to visit their newborn son for thirty minutes a week under supervision. It's completely nasty. They both left the class and I have not seen him since they split, although my FI is still fb friends with him. I still talk to her occasionally on group chats on fb and she RSVP'd that she is coming to my shower on Saturday.
While my thoughts are with them during this difficult time, it does put my FI and I in a tricky spot. We feel it would be completely inappropriate to invite them as a couple since they no longer are one. But we thought it would also be rude to only invite one of them and which one would we choose since neither of us are extremely close to either one of them? We thought it would be best to not invite either of them, especially because it could be extremely tense if they both showed up at the party and saw each other.
I don't want to be rude though by inviting her to the shower and then not to the party. We also feel awkward not inviting them, but still inviting all of our mutual friends that are still in the class. If we don't invite them, what do I say if one of them asks if they were sent an invitation?
I need advice please!!!!!