Wedding Recap and Withdrawal

Choosing a Date - How did you do it?

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Re: Choosing a Date - How did you do it?

  • We also got engaged December 20! :) We are having our wedding in between both of our birthdays (May 3). Mine is Apr 27 and his is May 10. I didn't want to wait another year and neither did he. It's about 4.5 months for the planning and we are doing a destination wedding. So far, so good. You really don't NEED years to plan, it's all about your choice of venue, entertainers, etc. We do have a snafu in the fact our singer is going to audition for the x factor next month so would be possibly be canceling on us tho. I don't think that can be helped regardless of time planning though. So to answer your question, get married when you feel it's right. If you can be happy and not go crazy from the stress of wedding planning in a couple months, it's totally doable for this year! :)
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-recap-withdrawal_choosing-a-date-how-did-you-do-it?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:12Discussion:9cfaa4a3-e377-4151-b26c-fc2d367ee7fcPost:a6d4de87-42a5-4c70-8ad1-d2044b1822fe">Re: Choosing a Date - How did you do it?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Choosing a Date - How did you do it? : I chose 2012 instead of 2013 when my mom said, "why wait?" and offered to assist. (Otherwise, we would've had at least a year engagement to get finances together.) I wanted a summer wedding because of VIPs who were either in school or taught school. I picked my date based on venue availability, since I was planning a wedding in 6 months ish, and VIP availability (venue had 2 dates open, my officiant could only do one of them, so picked that one.) I didn't feel rushed planning because I just wanted to have a nice party with lots of friends around. I had a few things I wanted, but didn't get really bogged down in most of the details. Had a great time. My DH's grandparents are in good health, but definitely choosing 2012 over 2013 on my end was not in small part because both of them had to fly out to attend. I figured if the budget was available for a 80 person wedding in 2012, we would do it while we could have those particular VIPs. As I lost my grandparents in my youth, his grandparents attending was very important to me.
    Posted by EK2013[/QUOTE]

    We always knew we wanted a September wedding because that was our anniversary month. Sept. 14 2003 was the first day we met, and we are getting married Sept 14, 2013. So it is a very sentimental date to us.

    However, in your case, I would choose a date that you feel comfortable with. I understand you might not want to wait til next year because of the circumstances but don't get yourself into debt before you get married, it can cause problems later on down the line. We got engaged Nov of 2011 so we waited a 1 yr and 9months because we wanted to save money for the wedding AND for moving in (rent, furniture, etc). Its a very touchy situation you have because you want your grandfather to be there, and i totally understand, but maybe what you could do, is have a small ceremony now, and then plan your big one for next year?
  • We got engaged in June 2012 and I have always wanted an Oct. wedding because my parents and sister were married in Oct.  We found a venue we loved and my dad worked his magic to get us a date that we thought would be impossible (they already had someone booked for that date, but the couple never ended up signing the contract so the venue released them the day before we signed our contract!!!).  We are getting married October 12, 2013, which is Columbus Day weekend (BONUS!!) and it is the week after my parents got married, and the week before my sister got married.  So it is a perfect day for us that happened to work in our favor unexpectedly.
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  • We got married in Ohio.  I wanted as close to fall as possible, but without the icky weather.  So, we decided on September,  the 7th or 8th, don;t recall now.  Called the church and realized my FIL was performing at the church (we got married in their church by the pastor who married my FIL and his wife, my H's step mom) that night so it was booked.  So we decided for the next weekend.  LOL.  Done.  When people ask me why 9-15-12 I actually get to respond "Beause there was a "Pickin' and Grinnin' music event on 9-7"  LOL
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  • Hi there @soontobemrszito For me it could be exciting yet, brainstorming. Other than that all is well and you're good to go, I chose the summertime because I don't have that much pressure from work which gives me a lot more time to plan for my Wedding. Best of Wishes to both of you ! Cheers ! Smile
  • edited March 2013

    We had an interesting way of choosing. We knew that we'd be paying for the majority of it ourselves and the only time we have a decent amount of extra cash is tax season! So we wanted April (plus, we live in the north so a winter wedding isn't very desirable to me!). Then came figuring out the exact date. We wanted April 6 but that was the weekend that our family's church has a big fundraiser that 80% of my family attends and it's very important to them. So we then we wanted April 13th...The church we wanted was open, the reception hall was not. Soooo we went to the next weekend. April 20. Both the venues were open, our families can make it, and everything else fell into place! We have gotten comments from a few people that it's "Hitler's birthday" and then the all-too famous "4/20 national pot smoking day" that a few people had decided to point out to us. But we don't care. This is going to be our wedding day, and that's all I'll affiliate it with from this point forward. Smile
  • My FI and I got engaged in July.  I had just graduated from college, and am going to grad school this fall after a year-off from classes to recharge my batteries!  We chose to get married this summer, shortly before I leave for grad school.  There are several reasons, but mainly, it's because we wanted to do it sooner rather than later.  I have to be in school for 3 years, taking classes continously, even summers.  We're not 100% sure where we're moving to yet, but the closest place is 14 hours from home/where the wedding is.  Because I'll be a full-time student year-round, there's no time to plan and take off time for a wedding.  We'd have to wait until summer 2016 or later to do it, and we don't want to wait that long!  We chose our wedding date, July 19th, because it would give us exactly a one year engagement!  We thought it was pretty neat :)  It falls nicely between close family member's birthdays, and will give us plenty of time to recover from the wedding, pack up all our stuff, and visit with people before moving away and starting school.  I'm glad it worked out, because for us, we REALLY didn't want to wait another 3+ years!!
  • We knew we'd have a summer wedding because we're both teachers.  I had known for years where I wanted to have my wedding reception, so when H told my parents in May/June that he was planning to propose in September, my parents were concerned that the venue might be booked by then so they set up a meeting with the venue.  At that time, they only had a few dates available for the 2012 summer so they picked one.  The venue coordinator told them that he'd hold the date without a deposit, but if they had someone else interested in that date, he'd call my dad and my dad would either have to put down a deposit, or forfeit the date.  One week before my H proposed, my dad got a call that someone wanted that date.  My dad went ahead and put down a deposit, banking on the fact that I'd say "yes" to H's proposal AND that I'd be OK with that date.
    Right after H proposed, we went over to my parents house to celebrate and as we were talking about the excitement and planning that had gone into the proposal, my dad and my H were like, "Oh yeah, by the way you're wedding date has already been set for June 30, is that okay with you?" 
    To be honest I was actually glad that they went ahead and set the date for me.  That gave me a good starting point for wedding planning!

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  • We picked our date (9/6/2013) because we already had a vacation planned for the following week, and felt it could easliy be our Honeymoon! We like the fact that it's a friday because it's easier to get a lot of the things for the wedding. We only got engaged on 1/26/2013 so we have a pretty short engagement, but we didn't want to wait longer than we are, and it's a pretty small affair, so it worked for us!
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  • Logistics -

    first, we needed to do a longish engagement due to finances (we are paying for our wedding without much help from family) - so we knew we needed at least 2 years


    second, I found a venue I loved (and so it happens after visiting my fiance also loved)....they have 1/2 winter rates and thus....

    last weekend of March it was! (Saturday, March 29, 2014)
  • Most trees are full on beautiful by the end of september, and 10-4-14 Just looks like a cool date. Also we're poor, LOL. Alright, not poor, but I want a wedding where i can afford to invite all of our friends & family, and give them awesome food & enjoy the night.
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  • We were engaged in July 2011 at 23.  We knew we wanted a long-ish engagement and a fall wedding so Fall 2012 was an easy decision for us.   We found the venue/church we wanted and asked for availability.  We were left with several weekends available at both locations so we went with 9/22/12 because it was just two days after our dating anniversary.
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  • I wanted to get married in October, I love fall weddings but last year his brother all of a sudden got engaged after a 2 month relationship and so when we got engaged the month after their wedding I felt like October was no an option, so we chose November, I didn't want it close to Thanksgiving  so we chose the 9th due to my mom also having that weekend off from work. 
  • We picked our date July 5th. The 6th is my birthday and 4th of July is a great weekend. So we just want to make a big weekend out of it. We initially picked New Years Eve because we wanted everyone to celebrate our happiness with us. But Ohio in December no fun Cold!!!!!!!!!!!!
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  • I wanted a spring wedding, so I was thinking April.  I had to plan it around Passover and Easter, so I was hoping for April 25, 2015.  However, that is the White House Correspondents Dinner (meaning all the hotels in DC would be twice as expensive), so we selected May 2, 2015.  It was really just a matter of logistics, and when there wouldn’t be any conflicts.
  • We had a somewhat short planning process (four months). We picked the date first, and then worked the logistics around it. It was a little more difficult that way because we didn't have as many options and it really changed what I had pictured in my head, but it was my grandfather's birthday so it was very special to me. If you feel the date is really important to you then do what you can to make it work that way, but if you are hesitating now it might cause you to regret that date later on. It all just depends on how long you want your engagement to be/how much time you want to plan.
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  • We got engaged New Years Day of 2013. We decided to get married Oct 2014 (as you can see, you don't have an exact date yet, either).

    There's several reasons we choose the day we did. One, I was still in grad school and didn't want to do ANY wedding planning on top of all the other things I had to do to graduate. Two, I wanted time between graduating and the wedding to find a job so I could save up money for the event.

    We went with Oct because it's the off-season, so prices will be cheaper. It's also the time of the year where we really don't have a lot of anything else going on like family birthdays or things like that. We also live in SC, and we wanted a fall wedding so it wouldn't be as hot. The leaves should be changing so it should be beautiful.

    We haven't picked an exact date yet because we live in a collage town and football season gets crazy. We are going to wait until the football schedule is released so we can pick a day that doesn't fall on a home game weekend.

    We had a lot of people ask us why we were waiting so long to get married, but I really think we made the right choice in waiting. Planning has gone smoothly, and I don't feel overwhelmed and burred under all the details because I still have time to work everything out. And I like that I have time to try and lose some weight before the wedding. I'm still job hunting, too. We have started to purchase things for the wedding, but because the wedding is so far away, we don't have to worry about going through a budget all at once. We've got time to pay for things in smaller increments, which is nice. 

    This has just been a nice leisurely pace and I wouldn't have any other way.
  • we got engaged Jan. 24. 13 and our weddings is May 16. 14. so a little less than a year and a half and I am so glad we have this time to plan and get settled, save for the honeymoon, house, etc. originally I wanted a Saturday in June but the venue I loved was literally double the price because that is prime wedding season in cape cod. Turned out if we just moved it up a few weeks and changed to a Friday night we saved a TON of money so that's how I picked the date because there was NO WAY I was budging on our venue... I knew it was where we needed to get married as soon as I saw it :) Good luck!
  • Okay, I'll participate in the zombie thread.

    FI loves numbers. His birthday is 12/12, his mom's his 10/10, he initially asked me out on 11/11/11 at 11:11pm... So when it came time to choose our wedding date, it was simple once we realized 12/13/14 was on a Saturday.
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  • I wanted a fall wedding because I like the colours and I also find it too hot at summer weddings (didn't want to be all sweaty in my dress!). I just liked the way October 5th sounded - sounds stupid, but I just liked the date. We are also having a thanksgiving-type meal which I love (Thanksgiving is the weekend after our wedding - in Canada that is).
  • I was just wondering how you all chose your dates and what factors went into the decision.  If you went with less than a year, did you feel rushed planning?  Did a year and a half feel too long?  Just wanted to get thoughts and opinions from other brides to see how you all did it :)

    Wedding: We chose 11-12 because it was just whatever we pulled off the calender. We had about a month to plan it. We had a LOT of help to pay for it and sadly i regret most of it. 

    Renewal: We chose 11-09 because 11-12 is a weekday and we did not want to go close to Thanksgiving so 11-9 it was. We have been planning this since May or so. We are paying for everything ourselves. We have just saved and bought as we could, little by little. Some things we have had to cut but they have all worked out. 

    I feel like Planning the Renewal was 1000000000x easier than my wedding as far as a timeline goes. 
    Married 11/12/05 ~ Renewed Our Vows 11/9/13. 

    "The LORD will fight for you, you need only be still."


  • My fiance asked me to be steady on 05/25/2005 and I love the number 5 ever since then. We met young, in high school, and I thought that getting married 10 years from our 'steady' date would be romantic, plus we'd be out of college and starting our lives and career by then. I really wanted to get married near our original date of 5/25 and there's a Saturday of 05/23 which would be perfect plus easier on both of us to remember, haha! We didn't make an actual announcement of our chosen date because we had so much time, it wasn't necessary. However earlier this year, FI's best childhood friend nabbed 05/23/2015 and when he told my FI about the his wedding date, my FI didn't say anything! I'm getting over it and I know it's a little silly to be angry about this but it's how I feel and I know overtime I'll get over it. 

    After having to scratch our original date of 05/23/2015, we went with 06/20/2015 for a couple of reasons: fiance went back to school for a second degree and in June he'll have summer break, I've always like the idea of a  traditional June wedding since I'm doing for a vintage glam theme, and the number 20 sounds clean and crisp and a multiple of 5 (I'm grasping at straws there but it makes me feel a bit better so be it). We could have waited until 2016 for our May wedding but I honestly don't want to wait any longer, 10 years is enough :) 


  • We got engaged in Oct 2012, set a date for summer 2013. Then my mom announced she was getting married spring 2013, so we moved our date to Sept 2013, then she moved her date to Late summer 2013. So we moved the date to 2014. Also my SIL said she couldnt afford to come in 2012 because of another cousins destination wedding. And the family reunion for summer 2013 had to be rescheduled three times, so we were all dancing around dates. Finally I chose a date that wouldnt conflict with my younger siblings/cousins school schedules, in July and called it a day. sheesh!
  • We were married on October 19th.  It was my grandmother's birthday so it was an easy choice.  Plus it happened to land on a Saturday...which is what we wanted.
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  • We had a general time frame in mind (summer, 2014).  We then checked with our immediate families and wedding party to see if there were any dates during that time that they were not available.  From that, we generated a list of 9 weekends from late May to early September that all of our VIPs were available.  One of those Saturdays happened to be the 6th anniversary of our first date, so it had some significance for us and became our preference.  We looked at venues with all of those dates in mind.  Our favorite of the venues was available on our favorite of the dates, so we didn't have to make a choice between the two.
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  • melbensomelbenso member
    First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its First Comment
    edited December 2013
    deleted.  double post.
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  • We knew we wanted to be married a year later in the fall. So we got engaged in 2010, wanted to be married the fall of 2011- plenty of time. 

    We wanted a saturday before daylight savings. Ok....so we looked at the calendar. Couldn't do October 31st because it's my cousins birthday (and thankfully because we had our Frankenstorm that day) and 11-11-11 was naturally taken. So the ONLY option was Nov 5th. We met on April 5th so technically it's meaningful...idk. The date really didn't matter to us at all. 
  • There was no special reason behind the date we chose (March 25). This date was chosen mostly on cost. It was considered "off season" and slow for a lot of vendors so we got a lot of discounts.The date was early spring as we did not want to get married in the winter (even though our wedding day ended up being REALLY cold)!
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