Wedding Party

Uneven Wedding Party

Ok so my fiance's has this somewhat long list of groomsmen which is completely fine but my problem is that I don't have many close friends. I've asked my best friend, my SIL, and 2 other friends but that's still not enough to make or wedding party equal. My fiancé has no sisters or female family that he's particularly close to either... so my question is how do I even out our wedding party? Should I ask a girl that I've had in mind that I'm not as close with? Do I ask his bestfriend's wife that he is close since she's important to him (kinda like a sister) Do I make a groomsman or 2 walk alone? I don't want to ask him to cut anyone out because I know those people are important to him so I just don't know what to do. Any suggestions?

Re: Uneven Wedding Party

  • Firstly, you don't need to have a wedding party. Secondly, your sides don't have to be even. Thirdly, you don't need to separate by sex.

    I'm having 2 BMs, my FI is probably only having one GM. You need to pick people who are nearest and dearest to you.
  • Don't worry about even sides. That is very out of date. No one is counting the people. 
  • Jen4948Jen4948 Houston
    10000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
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    You don't need even sides. And no one would appreciate being asked to be in a wedding party or removed from it in order to have even sides.
  • No one cares about even sides or gender separated wedding parties anymore. People have finally realized that it's more important to have close friends standing next to you than symmetry and 'boys vs. girls'.
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    novella1186
  • Maggie0829Maggie0829 Ravens & Bohs & Crabs & O's
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    Our wedding party was uneven and our marriage is still valid.

    BouxRadley
  • blabla89blabla89 Atlanta
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    Your WP doesn't need to be even. Your groomsmen can walk alone or together or however you want. Honestly, 30 minutes after the ceremony most people won't remember how they walked in anyway. And for the love of everything, PLEASE do not ask someone to be in your WP just for the sake of having even sides, and don't ask your FI to exclude people who are important to him.
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  • novella1186novella1186
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its Second Anniversary First Answer
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    edited June 2015
    I have to echo PPs that you do not need even sides. 

    I had 5 on my side, H had 6 on his side. And one of my BMs was a guy I've been best friends with since childhood. 

    We had H's GMs come in from the side and stand at the front. Then my BMs walked down the aisle alone. When we "recessed" they paired up, so 2 guys walked together (since one of my BMs was a guy) and then the last of my BMs walked with 2 GMs since H had an extra. 

    It wasn't a big deal at all. I cared far more about both of us including the people we loved the most than having the outdated perfectly matching boys vs girls. 
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  • MyNameIsNotMyNameIsNot Atlanta
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    Even sides are silly. 

    Friends are important; numbers are not. Stick with the ones you've asked and leave it alone. 
    novella1186
  • I was concerned about this same thing. But in the end, I realized it doesn't matter if the wedding party is 'equal', at the end of the day FI and I will still be married! As long as we both have the people that mean the most to us standing by us that's all that matters!
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  • OliveOilsMomOliveOilsMom South Jersey
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
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    Ok so my fiance's has this somewhat long list of groomsmen which is completely fine but my problem is that I don't have many close friends. I've asked my best friend, my SIL, and 2 other friends but that's still not enough to make or wedding party equal. My fiancé has no sisters or female family that he's particularly close to either... so my question is how do I even out our wedding party? Should I ask a girl that I've had in mind that I'm not as close with? Do I ask his bestfriend's wife that he is close since she's important to him (kinda like a sister) Do I make a groomsman or 2 walk alone? I don't want to ask him to cut anyone out because I know those people are important to him so I just don't know what to do. Any suggestions?
    Even sides don't matter.  I had 5 BMs and H had 3 GM.  I simply had the last two "extra" BMs walk out together.  I have also been in an uneven WP and I walked with 2 of the groom's brothers.
  • auriannaaurianna
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    edited June 2015
    You def don't need even sides. You can handle this in many ways:

    All the groomsmen can come in at the beginning and stand with the groom, with the bridesmaids coming in by themselves.
    Or you can have two groomsmen walk with one bridesmaid.
    Or have extra groomsmen walk in with grand parents / mother of the bride (assuming everyone is fine with that)

    Walking out, have everyone just walk out single file. Or have multiple groomsmen per bridesmaid. Or pair them off as normal and have just the extra groomsmen walk behind single file. Or the extra groomsmen can walk out next to each other.

    No right/wrong way to do it. Whatever you like best and they're comfortable with.
  • adk19adk19
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    aurianna said:
    You def don't need even sides. You can handle this in many ways:

    All the groomsmen can come in at the beginning and stand with the groom, with the bridesmaids coming in by themselves.
    Or you can have two groomsmen walk with one bridesmaid.
    Or have extra groomsmen walk in with grand parents / mother of the bride (assuming everyone is fine with that)

    Walking out, have everyone just walk out single file. Or have multiple groomsmen per bridesmaid. Or pair them off as normal and have just the extra groomsmen walk behind single file. Or the extra groomsmen can walk out next to each other.

    No right/wrong way to do it. Whatever you like best and they're comfortable with.
    Exactly.  It's not like walking side-by-side with someone makes everyone think they're romantically attached as a couple.  Ask who you want to stand up next to you, FI does the same.  Numbers don't matter except that you're expected to get everyone a gift in thanks for taking time out of their schedules to be with you, so it could end up being a money thing.
  • huskypuppy14huskypuppy14 Boston Suburbs
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    There is no problem having uneven sides. I had 3 and my H had 6.
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  • I'm of the opinion that you only ask people that you have a good, strong relationship with. Weddings can be stressful and put a strain on relationships (check out some of the other posts on this board as evidence). I've been a bridesmaid in 5 weddings and only one of those weddings had a wedding party where the bride's side and the groom's side had the same amount of people. I was once in a wedding where there were 10 bridesmaids and 3 groomsmen. 
  • DItto what everyone has already said.
    My FI is having 1 Bestman and 1 Groomsman, where I am have 3 Bridesmaids (no MOH).
    We're going to have everyone walk out single file- My FI first followed by his guys, then my girls followed by my Dad and I.

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  • LD1970LD1970
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    I had 3, H had 4.
    You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough. ~Mae West
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