Can I vent please?

sarawifenow

Ok, so I will try to keep this short.

 

H and I went to a new Dr yesterday to try to find out what the issue is with us getting pregnant and then losing the pregnancy so quickly. I was finally starting to feel better about everything and now I am pissed.

 

The Dr was just ok, but the CMA before we saw the Dr was the rudest person I have ever met. She literally looked at me and said, "so what's the problem? Why can't you keep a baby?" Bitch, that's why I'm here. She then proceeds to make jokes like "well if you stand on your head after sex it helps" and "I bet your husband doesn't mind all the extra sex, huh?" Then as she was leaving she goes, "sorry you're having trouble, unlike me, I didn't even have to try for my two kids. I got pregnant right away and had perfectly healthy pregnancies".

 

I am at a complete loss. H thinks we should say something to the office manager. I kind of just want to move onto the next doc. What would you do? Thanks for letting me vent.

Maggie0829

I would definitely be saying something to the Doctor and to the office manager.  That is beyond unprofessional.  You need to complain.

ETA:  And you should complain whether or not you decide to continue with that doctor. They need to know about this because other patients may be unhappy yet are too nervous to say anything.

novella1186

Oh my god. Wow. That is so fucking out of line and gross. I would like to smack her for you. Just wow. 

I agree, talk to the office manager or the doctor and let them know how this dumb bitch treated you. It's so ridiculously unprofessional, and totally lacks the tact and compassion that people in their field are supposed to have, not to mention any decent human being. I'm so ragey for you. 

stefuhknee

I am enraged for you. Wtf is wrong with people? I would definitely complain to the office manager.

kaos16

sarawifenow said:

Ok, so I will try to keep this short.

 

H and I went to a new Dr yesterday to try to find out what the issue is with us getting pregnant and then losing the pregnancy so quickly. I was finally starting to feel better about everything and now I am pissed.

 

The Dr was just ok, but the CMA before we saw the Dr was the rudest person I have ever met. She literally looked at me and said, "so what's the problem? Why can't you keep a baby?" Bitch, that's why I'm here. She then proceeds to make jokes like "well if you stand on your head after sex it helps" and "I bet your husband doesn't mind all the extra sex, huh?" Then as she was leaving she goes, "sorry you're having trouble, unlike me, I didn't even have to try for my two kids. I got pregnant right away and had perfectly healthy pregnancies".

 

I am at a complete loss. H thinks we should say something to the office manager. I kind of just want to move onto the next doc. What would you do? Thanks for letting me vent.

That was terribly rude and unprofessional of her!!!  I'm sorry you had to deal with such a douchecanoe!  Now that a day has passed, I would absolutely call the office manager (or have your husband call).  There is no way that she should be able to talk to people that way, especially in a sensitive medical setting!

emmaaa

I agree with your H. You definitely need to let the office manager know how unprofessional she was. The things she said were hurtful and obviously upset you. I would not go back to this office if they don't do something about that. If you do go back, I would request you never deal with her.

NowIAmSyp

Ick. I'm sorry...  just reading that made me feel gross.  I would definitely have said something to the doctor who came in afterwards- without a doubt.  

If you decide to stay with that doc, when you call to make your next appt, I would make sure to specify you want a different CMA involved.

OliveOilsMom

I would complain to the office manager or doctor.  Also, if they are a part of a larger company, I would complain to the main company too.  That is completely unacceptable and unprofessional.  I'm sorry that happened to you.

mikenberger

Well that was a bunch of asshole things to say. Definitely say something. Because what she's saying to you, chances are she's saying that to someone else.

kaitlynmichelle

Regardless of if you stay with that dr or not, you should complain. She was out of line saying that, I'm enraged reading this. She needs an attitude check or another career, because that was extremely inappropriate and she should be ashamed.

[Deleted User]

Ditto PP's. What a horrendous bitch! Someone like that does not belong in the medical field, in away way. I would definitely tell the office manager, and if you don't plan on staying with the Dr., I'd let them know she is the reason you are leaving.

banana468

Definitely say something.   They need to know that they're going to lose patients in that practice because of what the CMA is doing/saying.   They could be providing excellent care and people are going to leave with a sour taste in their mouths because the first impression was someone who had zero tact or understanding.

Pick up the phone now and call.   If I ever had someone treat me that way at the OBGYN's office I'd scream.   What's next, she tells someone with cervical cancer, "Well, that's what you get for getting HPV !" 

MairePoppy

That CMA needs some sensitivity training or a new career. You or your husband should talk to the office manager, let her/him  know you will be following up with a written complaint to the doctor or whoever manages the practice. 

sarawifenow

Thanks everyone. You guys are right. I need to call and make a complaint. I am still in shock that she said those things. Luckily, my friend recommended a new place that is getting me in on Monday so I won't have to deal with those people again. I'll be sure to call and speak with the manager today.

kvruns

regardless of if you move onto another doctor I would complain and let them know what was said. I might also send a written letter too.

kaos16

and also, @Sarawifenow. . . . . I hope you put everything she said to you right out of your head after you contact the office manager and pretend like this woman doesn't even exist.  Nothing she said matters. . . .focus on yourself and being healthy and happy!

sarahufl

Nope, nope, nope. Get on the phone and complain. That is not ok.

When I was getting treated for my Ectopic, the woman behind the counter LOUDLY hollered into a room full of people "Sarahufl, you are here for some sort of problem, right?"

I was too blown away to say anything to her face but you bet your ass I told the doctor as soon as I had the opportunity. Not ok.

lovemesomemonster

Oh my gosh! That is horrible! I get the whole "foot in your mouth" thing when you don't know someone's situation but for her to say those things KNOWING what was going on is.. I have no words. I'm so sorry that happened, for sure say something and then put her out of your mind, she sounds like a terrible person or has NO social skills.

loveislouder

sarawifenow said:

Ok, so I will try to keep this short.

 

H and I went to a new Dr yesterday to try to find out what the issue is with us getting pregnant and then losing the pregnancy so quickly. I was finally starting to feel better about everything and now I am pissed.

 

The Dr was just ok, but the CMA before we saw the Dr was the rudest person I have ever met. She literally looked at me and said, "so what's the problem? Why can't you keep a baby?" Bitch, that's why I'm here. She then proceeds to make jokes like "well if you stand on your head after sex it helps" and "I bet your husband doesn't mind all the extra sex, huh?" Then as she was leaving she goes, "sorry you're having trouble, unlike me, I didn't even have to try for my two kids. I got pregnant right away and had perfectly healthy pregnancies".

 

I am at a complete loss. H thinks we should say something to the office manager. I kind of just want to move onto the next doc. What would you do? Thanks for letting me vent.

Okay. I'm ragey for you.  The first bolded is just dumb. The second is... like what the actual fuck? Was she seriously bragging because she had no issues? I'd be on the phone in a heart beat. I'm glad you're moving on from them.

ETA: I literally have no words.

princessleia22

Wow... that is all sorts of hell no.  I would absolutely call and tell the office manager or doctor about it. I'm surprised you didn't go into a rage in the office right then, but I can also imagine being in a total state of shock and wondering if she really just said that shit. If she's saying it to you, she likely is saying rude things to other patients as well, so her bosses need to know and get that disease out of their office.

[Deleted User]

Say something; this is beyond tactless and incredibly insensitive.  And I'm not even all "yay babies!"

Knottie91379610

Wow. What a rude and pretentious woman. I don't even have words. 

You should speak to whoever is in charge about this unacceptable behavior. She has no right to treat you like that, and there is no excuse for her to use the words she used. 

There may be little you can do, but definately write a complaint, and never go back to that place again. 

fyrchk

File a complaint like yesterday. Completely unacceptable.

I had to have a hysterectomy at an early age due to health issues. My surgeon got sick and so another surgeon filled in. As I'm laying on the table getting ready to go under he says, "Are you sure you want to do this? You know you won't be able to have kids, right?" No, I haven't thought about it, been to therapy, cried over it, and finally accepted it. I was treating this like a drunken tattoo idea at Spring Break.

I wish you and H all the best of luck with this new doctor and with babies.

southernbelle0915

I know this is a couple days old, but also complain to your insurance carrier. At the health plan where I used to work, if an office got a certain number of substantiated complaints (wasn't too high - like 5) in 2 years, they'd be kicked out of network.