Gift Questions

BfloGirl32

I am being escorted down the aisle by my Dad's best friend because my Dad died 6 years ago. This is the man he selected to walk me down the aisle before he died and I want to give him an appropriate gift but am unsure of what exactly. I want it to be personal and not just your standard beer mug or flask. Any thoughts?

Also, is anyone giving gifts to the people who are doing a reading in the wedding or to the officiant? Both are very dear friends so I don't want to offend someone and not get a gift.

Thanks!

jacques27

I don't think gifts are required in this circumstance, but if it's in your budget go for it.

Personally, I think the best gift you could give is a heartfelt letter thanking them for being a part of your wedding day and expressing how much they mean to you, particularly your dad's best friend.

MyNameIsNot

I don't know what to give this guy, because I don't know him. Maybe a photo or some sort of something that will remind him of your dad?

We did give gifts to our readers (booze). We gave money to the priest, but I think that's considered a donation to the parish. I don't think you need to get a gift for the officiant unless it's a friend/family member. 

spglsp

I'm not sure how close you are to this person aside from him being your father's friend. If he's someone you're very close to who you would've asked to do this on your own, sure, go ahead and write him a heartfelt letter, the framed photo idea is also nice, alcohol is almost always welcome, a gift certificate for something that interests him (like a restaurant he enjoys) or tickets to an event (sports, concert, movies, etc.) could also work. If he's someone who you only know because of this role, I wouldn't feel obligated.

We're giving a gift to our officiant and if we had readers, they would get something too. It doesn't have to be something elaborate or expensive, but a token to show your appreciation is always nice.

Jen4948

Do you know this person really well and know about his personal likes and interests?

If so, I'd give him something tailored to those likes and interests. 

A heartfelt letter is certainly a nice touch as well-even if you don't know him well.

redoryx

I say a letter and/or if you can find an old photo of him and your dad together and frame that it might be nice.

knottie9c5ed33df4bbd226

We are required to give a "suggested donation" to our priest so there's that. We are also doing small gifts for our readers and gift bearers. Most likely a gift card to somewhere we know they like. My uncle is doing a reading and I got him a Barnes & Noble gift card and I am going to write a nice card and present it to him at the RD.

MandyMost

At our rehearsal dinner we gave gifts to our bridal party and our immediate families (which included our readers). We ended up giving the same things to the bridesmaids, and the same things to the groomsmen, but otherwise they were all different.

We aimed to give something that each person would like, but also would be a keepsake from the wedding. For instance, in addition to their present we gave everyone a christmas ornament that had the city skyline we got married in, and the year, and on the back it said "Thanks for being a part of our wedding!" or something like that. My bridesmaids got a sweatshirt (my favorite hoodie) in a color i know they liked, and a wine stopper. The groomsmen got a golf tool thing with their initials on it. His parents got an engraved vase. My mom got a picture frame with a sentimental saying on it. His sister (a reader) got a blanket with her name embroidered on it. My brother got a beer and wine opener with his name on it. And everyone got a heartfelt card. 

[Deleted User]

If he has a SO and/or kids who will be there too, have your photographer get a picture of him with his SO and then if they have kids, one with the kids & maybe one with just the kids. Basically a quick 5 minute mini photo session of family shots for them & then give him prints as a gift. Not many families take the time to get professional pictures done & they would all be dressed up, so perfect timing.

 

kaos16

MandyMost said:

At our rehearsal dinner we gave gifts to our bridal party and our immediate families (which included our readers). We ended up giving the same things to the bridesmaids, and the same things to the groomsmen, but otherwise they were all different.

We aimed to give something that each person would like, but also would be a keepsake from the wedding. For instance, in addition to their present we gave everyone a christmas ornament that had the city skyline we got married in, and the year, and on the back it said "Thanks for being a part of our wedding!" or something like that. My bridesmaids got a sweatshirt (my favorite hoodie) in a color i know they liked, and a wine stopper. The groomsmen got a golf tool thing with their initials on it. His parents got an engraved vase. My mom got a picture frame with a sentimental saying on it. His sister (a reader) got a blanket with her name embroidered on it. My brother got a beer and wine opener with his name on it. And everyone got a heartfelt card. 

What is it about weddings that makes people want to personalize every gift they give?

loveislouder

Our reader and our MC were married, so we gave them an Edible Arrangement. They loved it.

lightningsnow

kaos16 said:

MandyMost said:

At our rehearsal dinner we gave gifts to our bridal party and our immediate families (which included our readers). We ended up giving the same things to the bridesmaids, and the same things to the groomsmen, but otherwise they were all different.

We aimed to give something that each person would like, but also would be a keepsake from the wedding. For instance, in addition to their present we gave everyone a christmas ornament that had the city skyline we got married in, and the year, and on the back it said "Thanks for being a part of our wedding!" or something like that. My bridesmaids got a sweatshirt (my favorite hoodie) in a color i know they liked, and a wine stopper. The groomsmen got a golf tool thing with their initials on it. His parents got an engraved vase. My mom got a picture frame with a sentimental saying on it. His sister (a reader) got a blanket with her name embroidered on it. My brother got a beer and wine opener with his name on it. And everyone got a heartfelt card. 

What is it about weddings that makes people want to personalize every gift they give?

Because stores like Things Remembered make you think it's what is the right thing to do. I worked there during wedding season and we were always told to push for personalized gifts to every customer. It's all about the money the wedding industry makes.

BfloGirl32

Thanks everyone; these are some great ideas! Yes, he is like family and I likely would have asked him to do this regardless of my Dad's wishes. I think I am going to go with a framed photo of he and my Dad... I think he will really love that.

annakay511

I think a gift for your father's friend would be really special, but I do not have any good ideas! For our readers, I am writing a thank you note and am thinking a gift card.