Invitation Etiquette Question.. Does this look right?

libride2015

Ok - 

I got back my second proof for my invitations - - 

Something if off I just dont know what.

Should their be an "&" between my parents and FI parents names?

What do you guys think of the text overall?

Am I missing anything?

As always I appreciate all your help ladies! Xo

Maggie0829

Well you should get rid of the "formal attire" on the bottom.  It is rude to dictate attire to your guests.  Your invitations are fancy so people won't think that showing up in jeans and a t-shirt is a good idea (those who do will think that no matter what you list on your invite), but then your wedding is in the late morning so expecting people to dress up formally is a bit much at that time. Just trust your guests that they know how to dress themselves appropriately.  And anyway their attire is not going to affect the outcome of your wedding.

Don't use the ampersand symbol.  It is correct to spell out the word "and."

I believe it should be "half after" not "half past" when it comes to the time.

And you don't need to list that there is a cocktail hour.  Just put "Reception to follow" on the bottom.  That is kind of an all inclusive statement.

Casadena

Honestly, I could hardly read your names and that's a HUGE pet peeve of mine on invitations.  Obviously I'll probably know who's wedding it is, but I personally think it looks kind of silly. 

I think wording is fine with the exception of "formal attire".  Get rid of that.

[Deleted User]

jrothstein101 said:

Ok - 

I got back my second proof for my invitations - - 

Something if off I just dont know what.

Should their be an "&" between my parents and FI parents names?

What do you guys think of the text overall?

Am I missing anything?

As always I appreciate all your help ladies! Xo

My first thought was to have you get rid of "formal attire" at the bottom but both PPs mentioned that.  Personally, I think it looks weird to not have either of your last names listed.  It may be proper, but I think it's odd.

JerseyBeachGal22

I agree the names are difficult to read with all the swirls. Definitely add "and" in between the sets of parents' names. I also agree that cocktail hour does not need to be mentioned and "Reception to Follow" works perfectly instead.

I'm assuming you added "Formal Attire" due to you not wanting everyone to show up in casual attire since it's a morning/day wedding. Yet, your venue location should give the guests an idea in itself (I live near the beach but work in NYC, so I understand that there can be beach formal, dressy casual, black-tie optional, etc. depending on the venue and have seen this noted on most invitations I've received). It really doesn't bother me in the slightest, but just be mindful that sometimes adding those two words offends guests more often than not (as PPs have noted).

Jen4948

First, change the font your names appear in to one that's easier to read.

Second, get rid of "formal attire" at the bottom.  The only time it's appropriate to list a dress code on the invitation is if it is really a black tie or white tie event, and then the terms to use are "black tie" or "white tie" respectively.

Third, lose the ampersand. 

Fourth, don't use "cocktail hour." Just use the phrase "Reception to follow."

CMGragain

Mr. and Mrs. Bridesparents
Mr. and Mrs. Groomsparents
request the pleasure of your company
at the marriage of
Bride's Full Name
and
Groom's Full Name
Saturday, the seventh of November
two thousand fifteen
at half after eleven o'clock
Venue Name
Address
City, State

Reception to follow

This is the traditional wording.  The cocktail hour is a part of your reception, not a separate event.  "Children" do not get married.  Are you requiring all of your guests to wear cutaway coats (morning coats) and gowns?  If not, you cannot dictate their attire.  Most people would probably choose a suit or a nice dress for a daytime wedding.

libride2015

Now - I am not trying to start any drama - but I just googled the etiquette so I could see what I should do - and theknot under their etiquette sections has some articles...  

Wording for Formal Wedding Invitations When Both Sets of Parents Are Hosting

By The Knot

FAVORITE

 

   

Mr. and Mrs. John L. Smith &
Mr. and Mrs. Mark Franklin Jacobson
request the honor of your presence
at the marriage of their children
Heather Marie
to
Michael Francis
Saturday, the seventeenth of May
two thousand and eight
at half past four in the afternoon

or

Mr. and Mrs. John L. Smith &
Mr. and Mrs. Mark Franklin Jacobson
request the pleasure of your company
at the marriage of their children
Heather Marie
to
Michael Francis
Saturday, the seventeenth of May
two thousand and eight
at half past four in the afternoon

Note:

• Be sure to list the bride's parents and groom's parents on separate lines, starting with the bride's.
• Because both last names are included in the greeting, you do not need to use either the bride or groom's last name.
• "request the honor of your presence" is traditionally only used if the ceremony is taking place in a house of worship.

Get more basic info on wedding invitations:

• How to address them

---so basically: this is exactly what I have. 

I did take out the cocktail hour line - thank you everyone for your help with that. 

In another article it states:

6. How do we let guests know our dress code?
The easiest way to get your point across is to include a dress code in the lower right-hand corner of the invite or on a reception card; “black-tie," “cocktail attire" or “casual attire" are all acceptable. Your invitation design will also clue guests in. An ultra-formal, traditional invite with letterpress and calligraphy will give guests a hint to the formal nature of the event, whereas a square invite with a playful font and bright colors would fit a much more casual style. Another way is to direct guests to your wedding website, where you can go into more detail about the weekend events and dress code in a more informal forum.

I know everyone is weary about the attire on the bottom- but my FI family doesnt have any sort of formal weddings, ever - so my FMIL asked that I put this, so they they will understand they need to come dressed up. She is worried that they wont if we dont have it. I am ok with it. 

Thank you all for your opinions and advice!

[Deleted User]

libride2015 said:

Now - I am not trying to start any drama - but I just googled the etiquette so I could see what I should do - and theknot under their etiquette sections has some articles...  

Wording for Formal Wedding Invitations When Both Sets of Parents Are Hosting

By The Knot

FAVORITE

 

   

Mr. and Mrs. John L. Smith &
Mr. and Mrs. Mark Franklin Jacobson
request the honor of your presence
at the marriage of their children
Heather Marie
to
Michael Francis
Saturday, the seventeenth of May
two thousand and eight
at half past four in the afternoon

or

Mr. and Mrs. John L. Smith &
Mr. and Mrs. Mark Franklin Jacobson
request the pleasure of your company
at the marriage of their children
Heather Marie
to
Michael Francis
Saturday, the seventeenth of May
two thousand and eight
at half past four in the afternoon

Note:

• Be sure to list the bride's parents and groom's parents on separate lines, starting with the bride's.
• Because both last names are included in the greeting, you do not need to use either the bride or groom's last name.
• "request the honor of your presence" is traditionally only used if the ceremony is taking place in a house of worship.

Get more basic info on wedding invitations:

• How to address them

---so basically: this is exactly what I have. 

I did take out the cocktail hour line - thank you everyone for your help with that. 

In another article it states:

6. How do we let guests know our dress code?
The easiest way to get your point across is to include a dress code in the lower right-hand corner of the invite or on a reception card; “black-tie," “cocktail attire" or “casual attire" are all acceptable. Your invitation design will also clue guests in. An ultra-formal, traditional invite with letterpress and calligraphy will give guests a hint to the formal nature of the event, whereas a square invite with a playful font and bright colors would fit a much more casual style. Another way is to direct guests to your wedding website, where you can go into more detail about the weekend events and dress code in a more informal forum.

I know everyone is weary about the attire on the bottom- but my FI family doesnt have any sort of formal weddings, ever - so my FMIL asked that I put this, so they they will understand they need to come dressed up. She is worried that they wont if we dont have it. I am ok with it. 

Thank you all for your opinions and advice!

******************Boxes*******************************

The Knot exists to make money off brides.  They are not concerned with proper etiquette.  Strangers who use the forums, however, make no money from this and are only trying to help.  Do not quote TK articles to us.  They're wrong at worst, misinformed at best.  CMGR is the best at the wording of invitations if a bit militant about it.  I'd take her advice on invitation wording over a million internet articles.

ILoveBeachMusic

Actually saying "half past" the hour is correct too.

CMGragain

Militant?  Me?  (Giggle!)

OP, never, ever use the ampersand on an invitation.  It is an abbreviation, and the ONLY abbreviations should be Mr. Mrs, or Ms., or R.s.v.p.  If you feel you must include "and", it belongs on its own line, between the two sets of parents.

Please, please, please don't put anything about attire on your invitation.

Maggie0829

libride2015 said:

Now - I am not trying to start any drama - but I just googled the etiquette so I could see what I should do - and theknot under their etiquette sections has some articles...  

Wording for Formal Wedding Invitations When Both Sets of Parents Are Hosting

By The Knot

FAVORITE

 

   

Mr. and Mrs. John L. Smith &
Mr. and Mrs. Mark Franklin Jacobson
request the honor of your presence
at the marriage of their children
Heather Marie
to
Michael Francis
Saturday, the seventeenth of May
two thousand and eight
at half past four in the afternoon

or

Mr. and Mrs. John L. Smith &
Mr. and Mrs. Mark Franklin Jacobson
request the pleasure of your company
at the marriage of their children
Heather Marie
to
Michael Francis
Saturday, the seventeenth of May
two thousand and eight
at half past four in the afternoon

Note:

• Be sure to list the bride's parents and groom's parents on separate lines, starting with the bride's.
• Because both last names are included in the greeting, you do not need to use either the bride or groom's last name.
• "request the honor of your presence" is traditionally only used if the ceremony is taking place in a house of worship.

Get more basic info on wedding invitations:

• How to address them

---so basically: this is exactly what I have. 

I did take out the cocktail hour line - thank you everyone for your help with that. 

In another article it states:

6. How do we let guests know our dress code?
The easiest way to get your point across is to include a dress code in the lower right-hand corner of the invite or on a reception card; “black-tie," “cocktail attire" or “casual attire" are all acceptable. Your invitation design will also clue guests in. An ultra-formal, traditional invite with letterpress and calligraphy will give guests a hint to the formal nature of the event, whereas a square invite with a playful font and bright colors would fit a much more casual style. Another way is to direct guests to your wedding website, where you can go into more detail about the weekend events and dress code in a more informal forum.

I know everyone is weary about the attire on the bottom- but my FI family doesnt have any sort of formal weddings, ever - so my FMIL asked that I put this, so they they will understand they need to come dressed up. She is worried that they wont if we dont have it. I am ok with it. 

Thank you all for your opinions and advice!

Unless your venue actually has a dress code or you are having a true black tie event, then no you don't have a dress code.  Instead you are imposing attire rules because YOU want your guests to dress a certain way to meet your vision.  That is not the same thing as a dress code.

You should never tell your guests how to dress.  They are primarily all adults (and any kids will be dressed most likely by their parents) and dress themselves for all types of events on a daily basis.  They can certainly do the same to attend your wedding.

ETA:  And so what if they don't come dressed in the way that meets your FMIL idea of formal?  How exactly will that effect anything?  You will still get married.  You will still have an awesome reception.  Someone's attire is not going to ruin your wedding.

lachattefatale

If your FMIL is concerned, she should gossip spread the news by word of mouth, not insist you add a dress code to the invitations.

Your font is a little difficult to read, but it is swirly and beautiful and I love it. I agree with PP that you can stick "and" between the parent lines and remove "cocktail hour" from the bottom (which you've done). I do not necessarily agree about ampersands, but for a formal wedding, "and" is probably preferable, if less pretty.

CMGragain

The ampersand rule comes from Emily Post, Crane's Blue Book, and Amy Vanderbilt.  It is allowed only if it is an artistic part of the invitation design.