Invite addressing Questions

aliwis000

Hello!

Ok, just hang with me. I am getting my list together for the calligrapher. (Found someone on Etsy with good reviews and a price that makes it feasible for me. SCORE!)

Anyway I currently have 3 addressing situations I am not sure how to deal with. It is also important to note we are not doing inner envelops, just outer. Help is greatly appreciated.

1. Person invited is not married and has a child but is invited to bring a guest ( I have asked this persons name so I address it correctly.) So it would be 'Jane Simth' and her child 'Ben' and then a guest. How does this work as 'Ben' would NOT be the son of the guest just Jane's son.

2. Husband and wife and their 2 kids are invited. Wife is a vet (aka she has her DVM). Husband is just a Mr. Smith. Plus their two kids.

3. I am inviting a co-worker, Jon Doe, his long term partner Jeff Smith who is a doctor. I am closest with Jon Doe but not sure who should come first or how to address since one is a doctor.

Thank you in advance. I am sure this will not be my last post as my guest list is long and I never dreamed things could be so confusing!
 

CMGragain

Are you using inner envelopes?  This solves a lot of your problems.  If you are not, I would do the following:

1.  Ms. Jane Smith  (Enclose a note that she is welcome to bring a guest.)
     Master (Mr.)Ben Smith

2.  Dr. Jane Smith and Mr. John Smith
     Miss Sally Smith and Master (Mr.)Bobby Smith

3.  Doctor Jeff Smith and Mr. Jon Doe

Master is the traditional title for boys age twelve and under. Since you are hiring a calligrapher, I assume that you want traditional wording?

Jen4948

CMGragain said:

Are you using inner envelopes?  This solves a lot of your problems.  If you are not, I would do the following:

1.  Ms. Jane Smith  (Enclose a note that she is welcome to bring a guest.)
     Master (Mr.)Ben Smith

2.  Dr. Jane Smith and Mr. John Smith
     Miss Sally Smith and Master (Mr.)Bobby Smith

3.  Doctor Jeff Smith and Mr. Jon Doe

Master is the traditional title for boys age twelve and under. Since you are hiring a calligrapher, I assume that you want traditional wording?

Regardless of what is traditional, boys age 12 and under tend to HATE being addressed as "Master."  This is one "tradition" I would skip and just use "Mr." instead.  It's like putting "junior" in front of "bridesmaid" or "groomsman" for an attendant between ages 9 and 18.

aliwis000

Thank you for all the information!

We are not using inner envelops. Hiring a calligrapher is more due to my lack of penmanship skills than anything else.

With that in mind is using the Master/Miss titles for children absolutely necessary? I have just never seen this done in my circle and am just curious. I have no doubt that this is the ultra formal wording and I bow down to the old school etiquette gods, however, if my family gets an invite with "Master Ben" on it they will call me pretentious. No matter how right I am. Once again, not trying to fight the "right way" just wondering if this is super common in other circles. 

frenchiekin

FWIW, we aren't inviting children, but I would never use "Master."  I would probably use Miss or Mr., but I've also seen children included on outer envelopes with no titles, as in:

Mr. and Mrs. John Doe

Sally Doe

I'd personally err on the side of Miss/Mr but I would not use Master for the same reasons you mentioned, again with all due respect for the traditional wording.

CMGragain

It just seems odd, to me, to use titles for adults, but not for children.  I don't think this is a big issue, though.  (I'm a Downton Abbey fan.)