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Wedding 911

Uninviting guests for financial reasons

Need help asap. We had planned a big backyard wedding. Invites went out to 160 guests. 50 days before the wedding we had some financial hiccups and we aren't able to pay for everything we needed too. We were already on a strict budget for the wedding and cant cut cost anymore. We have told some we are going to postpone the wedding. Problem...our family has non refundable airline tickets to come. Our thought is to only have our family present and still get married in the backyard. Yes we would be sad that everyone we would have liked to be there wont be, but the most important ones would. How do we go about letting those know who we have to uninvited? We don't want feelings hurt when they find out we still got married.

Re: Uninviting guests for financial reasons

  • ShesSoColdShesSoCold bend over and I'll show ya mod
    Moderator 5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its
    Need help asap. We had planned a big backyard wedding. Invites went out to 160 guests. 50 days before the wedding we had some financial hiccups and we aren't able to pay for everything we needed too. We were already on a strict budget for the wedding and cant cut cost anymore. We have told some we are going to postpone the wedding. Problem...our family has non refundable airline tickets to come. Our thought is to only have our family present and still get married in the backyard. Yes we would be sad that everyone we would have liked to be there wont be, but the most important ones would. How do we go about letting those know who we have to uninvited? We don't want feelings hurt when they find out we still got married.
    Ouch. This is bad. There's no etiquette-approved way to tell some people they cannot come to the event they were previously invited to.

    Can you move the time of the wedding - on the same day - to a non-meal time and serve cake, crackers, water and punch to all your invited guests?
    Image result for someecard betting someone half your shit youll love them forever
    [Deleted User]courtmcm
  • AddieCakeAddieCake Beyond the Wall member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    Yeah,I would just change the time and have a cake and punch and cheese and crackers reception.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
    image
    MesmrEwe[Deleted User]
  • Ditto PPs - I would change the reception to mid afternoon and just have cake and punch.  If you can offer some details as to how your budget is broken down, we may be able to help/offer some fresh perspective on ways you can cut without uninviting people.


  • Maggie0829Maggie0829 Ravens & Bohs & Crabs & O's member
    Eighth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    You need to change the time of your wedding which should be easy since it is a backyard affair. Have cake, drinks and some munchies and call it a day.

    The only other way is to cancel your wedding completely and reschedule it for another time.  Your family can see if they can get a flight credit for another time since their tickets are nonrefundable.

    ShesSoCold
  • We have no more cash to put out. Not even for what we haven't paid on the tables and chairs (only a deposit paid at this point). I think maybe its best to just not do anything on that day. Maybe we just head to the courthouse while our family is here. There's no way to uninvite people nicely, even though most of them haven't sent back their RSVPs.
  • AddieCakeAddieCake Beyond the Wall member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    Well, if you don't even have tables and chairs paid for and no money TO pay for them, then, yeah, you need to go to the courthouse. However, you still need to host SOMETHING for those people who go with you, even if it is just cake for them, so how will you be doing that?
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
    image
  • Jen4948Jen4948 Houston member
    10000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 25 Answers

    We have no more cash to put out. Not even for what we haven't paid on the tables and chairs (only a deposit paid at this point). I think maybe its best to just not do anything on that day. Maybe we just head to the courthouse while our family is here. There's no way to uninvite people nicely, even though most of them haven't sent back their RSVPs.

    I think your best option is to postpone your wedding until you recover financially, because if you can't provide hospitality to those relatives coming in from out of the area even if you go to the courthouse, then trying to have a wedding now that includes them just isn't going to work.

    I'd explain the problem to them and express regret profusely that you aren't currently able to host them with the basic amenities.
    MesmrEwe
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