this is the code for the render ad
Wedding Etiquette Forum

Addressing save-the-dates

A couple of quick questions...I've bee going back and forth, and keep finding different ways for addressing envelopes, so I figured I'd just ask! 
--Is Mrs. Jane and Mr. John Doe appropriate? I like including the wife's name, but think Mrs. and Mr. John and Jane Doe is funny because the titles and names aren't in corresponding order. And I think Mrs. Jane Doe and Mr. John Doe seems redundant, but I haven't seen anything about the first way I worded it. 
--Also, what number of kids should you change to say "and Family" instead of writing all their names out? And should it be: The Doe Family or Mr. and Mrs. Doe and Family? Which if writing the wife's name out like above would look like: Mrs. Jane and Mr. John Doe and Family...ugh. Now that doesn't look right. :-/ So many variables! 
Thanks for the help!

Re: Addressing save-the-dates

  • A couple of quick questions...I've bee going back and forth, and keep finding different ways for addressing envelopes, so I figured I'd just ask! 
    --Is Mrs. Jane and Mr. John Doe appropriate? I like including the wife's name, but think Mrs. and Mr. John and Jane Doe is funny because the titles and names aren't in corresponding order. And I think Mrs. Jane Doe and Mr. John Doe seems redundant, but I haven't seen anything about the first way I worded it. 
    --Also, what number of kids should you change to say "and Family" instead of writing all their names out? And should it be: The Doe Family or Mr. and Mrs. Doe and Family? Which if writing the wife's name out like above would look like: Mrs. Jane and Mr. John Doe and Family...ugh. Now that doesn't look right. :-/ So many variables! 
    Thanks for the help!
    I don't think of STDates as formal pieces of mail, so do whatever you want.  Except don't do "The Doe Family" as some people will think that means they can invite their grown children you didn't know existed, grandma who lives in a nursing home down the street, and even the dog since "she's totally family."

    Personally, I know I'll get told this is wrong, I'd invite John and Jane Doe.  If I was feeling fancy I might invite Mr. John and Mrs. Jane Doe.  If the couple is not married, take out the 'and' and put them each on a separate line.  Include the kids on the envelope if you're inviting kids.  

    Mr. John and Mrs. Jane Doe
    Sally, Mildred, and John Jr.
  • SP29SP29 member
    Sixth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    edited July 2015
    Married couples on the same line, separated by and. Unmarried couples on separate lines, no and. Children all listed on same line, but separate from parents.

    STDs are much less formal, so you're OK to address as you'd like.

    I agree about listing all children's names because as said, "and family" to some people literally means the whole darn family!

    To be technical, there *are* rules about how to write a married couples name, and I am sure many will chime in.

    I believe formally you would write "Mr. and Mrs. John Doe". However I know some women do not like to be addressed as Mrs. Husbands Name. My mother never did. You also aren't supposed to separate a male from his name.

    Following a less traditional/ more feminist thought process, I think I would do: "Mrs. Jane and Mr. John Doe".

    However, because a STD is less formal, you could also address as: "Jane and John Doe"
  • SP29 said:


    To be technical, there *are* rules about how to write a married couples name, and I am sure many will chime in.

    I believe formally you would write "Mr. and Mrs. John Doe". However I know some women do not like to be addressed as Mrs. Husbands Name. My mother never did. You also aren't supposed to separate a male from his name.

    Following a less traditional/ more feminist thought process, I think I would do: "Mrs. Jane and Mr. John Doe".

    THIS. When we asked our guests how they wanted to be addressed, all but 1 married couple responded with "Mrs Jane and Mr. John Doe". This was out of about 20 couples we asked. Even the super conservative ones asked to be addressed this way.

    For Save the Dates I just did "Jane and John Doe" to keep it informal. It was a cutesy magnet of birds on a bike, so it truly wasn't a formal save the date :)
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards