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How many guests should you expect to show up?

lildropofsunshinelildropofsunshine member
Combo Breaker First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
edited July 2015 in Wedding Invitations & Paper
I just had a conversation with my FI, and we sat down and cut more guests off our invite list, so now instead of about 175 we're down to about 100 (woohoo!). 

How many would you think would show up? I know you all are quite savvy and can probably give me a rough estimate based on experience(s). Thanks!
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Re: How many guests should you expect to show up?

  • CMGragainCMGragain member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    100%.  Do not expect anything less!
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  • ohmrs2014ohmrs2014 mod
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    I would expect 100% attendance.
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  • lildropofsunshinelildropofsunshine member
    Combo Breaker First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    Really? That surprises me! I thought you wouldn't expect 100% attendance due to prior commitments, travel arrangements/costs etc.
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  • CMGragainCMGragain member
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    You should see all the posts from tearful brides who counted on only 80% acceptance, but everybody came, and then they wouldn't fit in the building.  It happens.  Don't take the chance.
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  • lildropofsunshinelildropofsunshine member
    Combo Breaker First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    I only have reception venues in mind that would fit our much larger guest list, so that's no issue :) That's one nice thing about being in a small town -- limited options.
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  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
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    Always plan for 100% attendance.
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  • AddieCakeAddieCake member
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    All of them.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • Maggie0829Maggie0829 member
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    You always should plan for 100% attendance.  Don't believe any of those random percentages that you may find on the internet.  For example out of the 135 people we invited, 130 people RSVPd yes.  So yeah, pretty damn close to 100%.

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  • lildropofsunshinelildropofsunshine member
    Combo Breaker First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    It's more of a casual musing. I want to cut the invite list as much as possible because I'd rather not have a big wedding, and none of the reception venues I'm looking at are small (all can host at least 200, and we're hopefully only inviting half that). On my "must invite" list, I only have 43, and on my "would like to invite" list it's 50 and 56 if I include everyone that I want/have to invite. FI has to redo his list, but he said he has around 60 he thinks, so we're probably at 130 tops...and if I can get him to cut his list even more but still be happy, I will.
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  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
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    lildropofsunshine said:
    It's more of a casual musing. I want to cut the invite list as much as possible because I'd rather not have a big wedding, and none of the reception venues I'm looking at are small (all can host at least 200, and we're hopefully only inviting half that). On my "must invite" list, I only have 43, and on my "would like to invite" list it's 50 and 56 if I include everyone that I want/have to invite. FI has to redo his list, but he said he has around 60 he thinks, so we're probably at 130 tops...and if I can get him to cut his list even more but still be happy, I will.

    Two rules of thumb:

    1) Never invite more than your space can hold (and include vendors, yourselves, bridal party, family members, and SOs in your head count).

    2) Always plan for 100% attendance.

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  • NowIamMrsKleinNowIamMrsKlein member
    First Comment First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    Always plan on 100%

    We had several people who were sent an invite who no one expected would come. 1 cousin who hasn't attended a family event in 10 years. An Aunt an uncle I haven't seen since I was a teenager, 2 overseas uncles and a family friend who basically dropped off the face of the earth. They were all 'courtesy invites' (Invites to show them that we would love them to come, but no one expected they would).

    They are all coming. So far we have basically a 100% RSVP return. The only thing dropping our #'s is we gave everyone a +1, and some are not bringing people.

    It's totally unexpected and I have never been so glad that the knot recommended me to expect 100% as I never would have guessed that I would get it.
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  • princessleia22princessleia22 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment First Answer

    There will always be some people that attend even though you expected them to decline.  DH has an uncle nobody in the family has seen in nearly 20 years, even though he's been invited to events.  We thought he was an absolute decline, but invited him anyway. He decided to come. If it's OOT for many people, you may have more declines, but you never know until you start getting responses back. 

    Like others said, there are many people on these boards that have figured they'd have 10-20% decline, so they planned for such and ended up having to find new accommodations at the last minute or tell people they couldn't come because they couldn't fit that many people in the venue.  Or searching last minute to find money to pay for higher catering budget, and other costs that they hadn't planned for.  ALWAYS, plan your budget, venue, and accommodations for 100% attendance because it does happen often.  It's not uncommon to have some declines, but it's best to plan budget, venue, and everything for 100% attendance so you aren't left scrambling at the end.

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  • aliwis000aliwis000 member
    5 Love Its First Answer Name Dropper First Comment
    Always plan for 100% attendance.

    Its the only way to be 100% safe. Lots of factors go into attendance rates, time of day, day of week, holiday, out of town....and so on. Ask 100 brides what their attendance was and you will get 100 different answers. So until you get those RSVPs in you have no idea. Welcome to hosting a party as a grown up. It can suck at times.

    My FI and I stared well over 260, then we got it to 240. When we were gathering addresses I put my foot down and we cut another 20. We are not sending out invites for 224 people. Now some of those are kids under 3 that I do not have to pay for, some are parents who have told us they will not be bring their kids, others are people who have told us they will be out of town. But you know what? I am still planning for 100%. Sitters fall through, vacations change things happen.
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  • JoanE2012JoanE2012 member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    Plan for 100%.  Don't believe any of those silly "calculators".  
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  • julieanne912julieanne912 member
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    Agreed on plan for 100%.  I invited exactly the legal amount for my venue to hold (and don't forget to count vendors).  I imagine we'll have some declines since we have a lot of out of staters and people with kids in school that won't make the trip, in fact I've already been told by a few that they can't come (they still got invites though), but I'm still planning on 100%.  

    Married 9.12.15
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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
    First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its First Comment
    My MIL gave me her list & said don't worry, at least 30% of them won't come, guess what, out of the 70 people list she gave me, only 4 people didn't come. So plan your budget for 100% attendance.
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  • hellohkbhellohkb mod
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its First Answer
    I hear about a rough ~80% attendance rate quite often, but I'd still expect 100%. It's better to overbudget things rather than underbudget.


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  • MyNameIsNotMyNameIsNot member
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    I think the average is around 80%, but you have no idea whether you'll be on the top end or the bottom end of the average until you get your RSVPs back. So if you invite 100 people, you could end up with 50 people, you could end up with 100 people, or you could end up with 80 people. 

    As long as you have the budget and space for 100%, you're fine. 
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  • TheCheeseWenchTheCheeseWench member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Answer First Comment
    100%
    I am getting married out of state and on a Thursday (the venue, a brewery that FI has his heart set on doesn't allow private events on weekends). We originally planned to have about 50 or so, but once the mothers got involved and sent their lists of requested invites (random extended family and some old fam friends that they swear because of the day and travel won't come) the # skyrocketed. Because of this we are going to the venue next weekend to pick a 2nd possible ceremony spot on the grounds, because the one I originally wanted can only fit 60 chairs. You can't bank on declines, and every butt needs a seat. I have already been shocked to see how many people have messaged me to say how excited they are to get to attend and what a great excuse it is to make a weekend getaway of it. Some are even coming from out of the country. No, I'm not going to have the smallish wedding I had envisioned, but it feels really good to know how many people want to be there enough to take time off of work and travel for it. Now I'm looking forward to a wonderful evening with people I was afraid would have to miss it :)
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  • MaggieF1990MaggieF1990 member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    I have heard from event planners and friends and family who have been married recently, the "typical" rate is about 75%, but like everyone said, it's not safe to bank on that. I have a huge family and our invite list is at about 270, which includes family from out of state that I've literally never met. We were in LOVE with a venue that said they could fit 200, and when we went through our list to see who we thought would actually come, we came to about that...but I knew if we went with that venue, I would be worried to death until weeks before the wedding that all 270 would show up. I actually posted on these boards about my issue and had some people jumping down my throat about not planning for less than 100% attendance. I was really taken aback, but in the end, I went with my gut and the venue we ended up choosing is gorgeous and fits 250-300. Now my mind will be at ease for the next few months. :)

    Capacity doesn't seem to be an issue for you, so you could probably estimate that 75-80% number, but I definitely wouldn't plan anything around that.
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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Answer First Comment

    So as PP have said plan for ALL. But here are my numbers


    258 invites

    205 RSVP'd yes I believe

    180 showed up

    3 randoms.. :)

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