Best friend from High School expects to be MOH

Knottie41285392

So my best friend from High School is expecting to be my MOH. We only attended our first year of college together. We sort of grew appart after that since we were in different cities. I now feel like if I don't make an effort to talk to her, she does not talk to me at all. We even worked together one summer and sometimes at work she would just not speak to me at all without even saying why. There is another girl who I have grown closer to and now consider her my best friend. I also met her in High School and went to college 2 years together. Even though we don't live in the same city now we speak to eachother everyday. We speak wedding all the time and she is very excited about it and very happy for us. She even helped my now fiance in setting up a great proposal. Now, both girls happen to be cousins, And they are both my fiance's cousins. I really want my new best friend to be my MOH but I'm afraid my HS bestfriend will be hurt. I've considered having 2 MOH but it just seems weird to me. And the only reason why I would have 2 is just so that one does not get hurt. My best friend now says she would not be hurt if I didn't pick her, and I know she would not be, but I really want her by my side that day. I really don't know what to do here.

Jen4948

If you just aren't close to your best friend from high school anymore, chances are she doesn't really expect to be your MOH, especially if she doesn't initiate contact with you and you feel like you have to make all the effort to communicate with her.

I'd pick your new best friend as your MOH and let it go at that.  You don't owe anyone an explanation for why you picked her and not your high school best friend.

AddieCake

How do you know your HS BFF expects to be MOH? You could just not have one if you're worried about it.

OliveOilsMom

Knottie41285392 said:

So my best friend from High School is expecting to be my MOH. We only attended our first year of college together. We sort of grew appart after that since we were in different cities. I now feel like if I don't make an effort to talk to her, she does not talk to me at all. We even worked together one summer and sometimes at work she would just not speak to me at all without even saying why. There is another girl who I have grown closer to and now consider her my best friend. I also met her in High School and went to college 2 years together. Even though we don't live in the same city now we speak to eachother everyday. We speak wedding all the time and she is very excited about it and very happy for us. She even helped my now fiance in setting up a great proposal. Now, both girls happen to be cousins, And they are both my fiance's cousins. I really want my new best friend to be my MOH but I'm afraid my HS bestfriend will be hurt. I've considered having 2 MOH but it just seems weird to me. And the only reason why I would have 2 is just so that one does not get hurt. My best friend now says she would not be hurt if I didn't pick her, and I know she would not be, but I really want her by my side that day. I really don't know what to do here.

It is not silly to have 2 MOH.  I had 2!  I just couldn't chose between my sister and BFF.  But in your situation, it seems clear that you could chose a person to be MOH.  So go with your gut and chose the person you are most close to.  It sounds like its your BFF now, not your HS BFF.  I also wouldn't include your HS BFF in the WP unless you want her there, don't give her a pity invite.

onefootinthebayou

I had 2 MOHs.  They are sisters and I'm equally close to both.  They are the two girls in my life closest to me.

That said, you shouldn't choose someone b/c you feel obligated or guilty.  

Knottie41285392

You are totally right. I mean I know what I want. I just didn't want one to get upset. Thank you for your opinions!!

kiwicat1417

I had a friend who had four maid of honors and ten bridesmaids (which was a bit much but having two MOHs isn't uncommon). Your friend should think of it as an honor to be a regular bridesmaid. If she is mad that she isn't your MOH, then is she really your friend?