What is the correct response?

psiloveyouu

Some family members/friends have asked me "What do you want for a wedding gift?"

I always thought this was the only appropriate time to mention "We are registered at XYZ..."

More than once, the response has been something along the lines of "Well no one ever buys from the registry" or "Why do you want to register there? What else do you want, besides that?"

My response to this has been "I don't know, have you tried the bean dip?"

What is the proper way to respond to this? I understand there are worse things in life than having people who are happily willing to buy a wedding gift for you, but we currently live in a rather tight space and only registered for kitchenware/cookware, as this is the only thing we have room for.

I honestly wouldn't mind not receiving a gift at all, as I know a lot of people are traveling to attend our wedding. I just really don't have the space for anything other than what we have on our registry (or off registry items that fall in the same category).

How can I convey this the next time someone asks?

MobKaz

psiloveyouu said:

Some family members/friends have asked me "What do you want for a wedding gift?" I always thought this was the only appropriate time to mention "We are registered at XYZ..." More than once, the response has been something along the lines of "Well no one ever buys from the registry" or "Why do you want to register there? What else do you want, besides that?" My response to this has been "I don't know, have you tried the bean dip?" What is the proper way to respond to this? I understand there are worse things in life than having people who are happily willing to buy a wedding gift for you, but we currently live in a rather tight space and only registered for kitchenware/cookware, as this is the only thing we have room for. I honestly wouldn't mind not receiving a gift at all, as I know a lot of people are traveling to attend our wedding. I just really don't have the space for anything other than what we have on our registry (or off registry items that fall in the same category). How can I convey this the next time someone asks?

I would keep my response simple.  "FI and I have registered for those things we truly need and have space for in our home. Thank you for asking."

You can always add, if true, that your registry is small because you and FI are saving for XXX.

psiloveyouu

MobKaz said:

psiloveyouu said:

Some family members/friends have asked me "What do you want for a wedding gift?"

I always thought this was the only appropriate time to mention "We are registered at XYZ..."

More than once, the response has been something along the lines of "Well no one ever buys from the registry" or "Why do you want to register there? What else do you want, besides that?"

My response to this has been "I don't know, have you tried the bean dip?"

What is the proper way to respond to this? I understand there are worse things in life than having people who are happily willing to buy a wedding gift for you, but we currently live in a rather tight space and only registered for kitchenware/cookware, as this is the only thing we have room for.

I honestly wouldn't mind not receiving a gift at all, as I know a lot of people are traveling to attend our wedding. I just really don't have the space for anything other than what we have on our registry (or off registry items that fall in the same category).

How can I convey this the next time someone asks?

I would keep my response simple.  "FI and I have registered for those things we truly need and have space for in our home. Thank you for asking."

You can always add, if true, that your registry is small because you and FI are saving for XXX.



Thank you so much, that first response is perfect! I just didn't know how to say it without coming across as greedy or picky.

The second part isn't technically true for us - our registry is not that small and there's nothing we are really saving or wanting money for. If anything, we would likely use any cash gift towards the registry completion program

Thanks again!

AddieCake

I agree with MoBKaz. This really annoys me on your behalf. if you didn't want X, you wouldn't have fucking registered for it. What else do you want? Ugh.

SP29

I'm with Addie- those are some WEIRD questions.

I wasn't asked, nor have I ever heard of anyone asking, "WHY did you register THERE?" (Because I like their stuff!!) or "What else can I get you?" (a registry is also not a summons to buy X gift, it's a suggestion).

I like MoBKaz's suggestion.

[Deleted User]

That's rude of guests, if you don't want to buy from the registry, then just give money.

ILoveBeachMusic

I don't think it is rude to buy off registry. A registry is a suggestion. Sometimes off registry gifts are very thoughtfully bought and make you (general you) think of the giver for many years.I do think the comments were rude though.

JediElizabeth

Erikan73 said:

That's rude of guests, if you don't want to buy from the registry, then just give money.

I don't think it's ever rude to give someone a gift (unless it's something meant to intentionally embarrass or otherwise make someone feel bad). A gift isn't required, and it's a nice gesture. Thinking through an unexpected gift for a couple is a nice thing to do, even if it's not something the couple would buy themselves. 

Jen4948

Erikan73 said:

That's rude of guests, if you don't want to buy from the registry, then just give money.

You can give the couple any gift you like. There is no requirement that you give them only what they registered for or money.

Jen4948

psiloveyouu said:

Some family members/friends have asked me "What do you want for a wedding gift?"

I always thought this was the only appropriate time to mention "We are registered at XYZ..."

More than once, the response has been something along the lines of "Well no one ever buys from the registry" or "Why do you want to register there? What else do you want, besides that?"

My response to this has been "I don't know, have you tried the bean dip?"

What is the proper way to respond to this? I understand there are worse things in life than having people who are happily willing to buy a wedding gift for you, but we currently live in a rather tight space and only registered for kitchenware/cookware, as this is the only thing we have room for.

I honestly wouldn't mind not receiving a gift at all, as I know a lot of people are traveling to attend our wedding. I just really don't have the space for anything other than what we have on our registry (or off registry items that fall in the same category).

How can I convey this the next time someone asks?

Your guests are rude to be snarky about what's on your registry. Should you get these comments again, you can respond, "We thought about what we actually need and would like to receive as gifts, and that's what we registered for." If they continue to push back, I'd say, "Since we have different views on the matter, let's just leave the ball about gifts in your court. Bean dip?"