I got an invite to a distant family member's wedding. Before I saw the STD, I had no clue she was engaged/seeing someone. That's how close we are. The save the date just came a couple weeks ago, about 9 weeks before the wedding. The invitation arrived about 3 weeks before the wedding, which is in another state. It feels like it's just an invitation to send a gift, and that the STD and invite would have been sent sooner if I was actually expected to attend. I'm not going, but should I even send a gift? I'm a little miffed by the whole thing. Thoughts?