Hi everyone!
Our wedding was last Saturday, May 28, and it was such a precious and perfect day! I'm trying to upload some pictures to the "Real Wedding" tool but it keeps timing out on me when I try. I'll probably try late at night or early in the morning when website traffic is low.
Our wedding took place in the garden of my husband's parents' house, after which we had some pictures taken at the local pier at lake Ontario, followed by dinner at a restaurant. It was very DIY and custom made. Our colours turned out to be ivory and green with touches of yellow and brown.
- Relax! Read a few bridezilla stories on this board or elsewhere and take a moment to appreciate how much you do NOT want to be one of those brides. Make a habit of being as laid back as possible. Also, consider what this is about. This day is about you and the person you want to spend your life with.
There is actually only a few things you can't get married without. You need your license, an officiant, rings and each other. Everything else is extra.
- Register at theknot.com and play with the fun inspiration board tool. Look at a few boards first, for example this was mine:
http://www.theknot.com/inspiration-boards/Gallery/Details/53426 . Then go on to create your own. No need to consciously pick wedding colours, they will naturally come out of the pictures you're attracted to.
- Do you have a family member or friend who has a lot of experience with weddings and will always have your best interest at heart (usually a female)? Ask her early on to be your co-planner along with you. Then prepare to exchange a lot of emails in the months that will follow
- Do you have any specific things that you want for your wedding? Make sure to write them down early on and discuss them with the people involved. For example, we wanted a unity candle during our ceremony. It was one of the first things that took shape in our head.
- Do some research on what things cost and make a budget plan. Make a broad estimation for every detail and plan at least $1000 for the unexpected.
- Make a detailed to do list and a detailed shopping list. The knot has a checklist tool that will help you to do so. Spend a week adding to these lists and go over it with a few people. After this stage, all you have to do is simply (cough) execute these lists
et voilà, le wedding! ;-)
- Set priorities. Believe me, some things you might not want to DIY. Like your bouquet or your cake. Or your dress unless you're an amazing seamstress. Anything that might might make you unable to relax during your own wedding has to go, seriously!
We chose to DIY a wishing well, cake toppers, decorative flowers, favours, hair, makeup, manicure and the guest book. I'm fairly confident with my hair and makeup, and everything else was done before the day.
- Consider doing your wedding dress shopping alone. Yes, maybe it sounds horrible to you now, but I did it and I haven't a single regret. I know what looks good on my body and by shopping alone I couldn't get distracted by opinions of others.
Fall in love with a dress? Try on a few others. If you can't forget about that one dress, it's the one.
I did show my dress to my fiancé before I finally made the purchase (not for the superstitious!) as I wanted him to be happy with my choice.
- Consider buying shoes with no heel. I was very happy I did that. Not only are my husband and I the same height and would I have towered over him on heels, I also had a way easier time handling my dress. Also, I had pain-free feet!
- Give the groom specific tasks that he either likes and/or is good at. Most men hate to be involved in the whole everything.
- Hire people you like and trust. Then listen to them if they try to give you some good advice, since it usually comes from years of experience. Our photographer insisted we had some photos taken at the pier of the town we got married in and I'm very happy we listened to him, as those turned out to be our best photos!
- Delegate. Let go of your need to control every detail. Leave some of the decisionmaking to someone you trust. If you have trouble making a choice, wonder whether that is because you would be happy either way. If so, leave it to someone else to choose. Make sure you have a day-of person that people can talk to if there are any questions or issues. Also, it's ok to occasionally tell your loved ones "just solve it" if they come to you with ridiculous questions at ridiculous times.
- Make a list of pictures you definetely want taken, but don't go in too much detail. For us it was a few family combinations that we listed one by one, plus a picture of the rings, pictures of our DIY stuff and a back-of-the-dress pic. We also told the photographer that we like the funny, the romantic, and the artistic.
-Keep an eye on the weather and if you're getting married outside, talk about an emergency indoors backup plan. If the weather forecast for the wedding day seems a bit unstable, make a list of things that need to be "saved" from the rain, assign saving tasks to people and remember this rule: The bride and groom will be too busy saving themselves if it happens!
- Plan the last days broadly. Especially the getting ready part. You don't want to be late at your own party. And things always take more time than you think
- Make sure everybody knows what's expected of them during the day. You don't want to spend half of your wedding day briefing people!
- Accept some help on the day. I'm a pretty relaxed girl, but I was very happy to have my best friend there, cleaning my curlers and makeup up after me while I was getting ready and thinking about everything I might have forgotten!
- Walk like a queen. Which means you straighten your back and put one foot in front of the other. Take smaller steps than usual and walk slower than usual. It diminishes the risks of tripping over your dress and falling.
- Take a moment before the wedding starts, and consciously let go of the planning side of you and anything you would normally want to control. Pull yourself back in the moment. This is it baby!
- Smile a lot during our wedding, but don't over-grin. And dreamy pictures, unexpected facial expressions and funny moments are also very nice.
- Need the restroom? Use the disabled washroom if possible as it is usually nice and big. And this is how you do it easily: Take off your underwear, take a hold of the front of your dress and pull it up, then sit on the toilet the other way than you normally would, with your face to the wall. Your train etc. will be hanging behind you and not bother you. Easy!
- Don't get too drunk and don't tell dirty jokes. Also: don't kiss with tongue!
- Thank people who made this day possible for you!