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Do you tell someone they're not in the WP

kimmiinthemittenkimmiinthemitten member
First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
in Wedding Party
Fi asked me to take a question to the boards. We have friends coming over today to watch the Lions game and celebrate his birthday. One of these friends is an old college friend and they've remained close since however FI decided he won't ask him to be a GM. He thinks this friend probably expects to be a GM since FI was for him. Should he say something preemptivly (not necessarily today) or let him find out naturally? I already told him if the wife asks I'm going to say I'm not sure if FI has decided yet. Just for clarification: I know now it's too early to pick WP but didn't know that when we asked. We were excited:). Unintentionally (and not for even sides) we both asked our sibling, best friend, and cousin so while I know anything can happen the person with the shortest relationship is 16 years. Also I know WP are not tit for tat so FI doesn't have to ask friend however that doesn't mean some people don't treat them as such.
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Re: Do you tell someone they're not in the WP

  • artbyallieartbyallie mod
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    Don't bring it up! If the friend says something about it, your FI can say, "Oh, Mike, Pete, and John are my groomsmen. I can't wait to party with you at the reception!" and change the subject. "Wow, did you see that tackle?" This is, of course, assuming this friend will be invited to the wedding.
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  • kimmiinthemittenkimmiinthemitten member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    artbyallie said:
    Don't bring it up! If the friend says something about it, your FI can say, "Oh, Mike, Pete, and John are my groomsmen. I can't wait to party with you at the reception!" and change the subject. "Wow, did you see that tackle?" This is, of course, assuming this friend will be invited to the wedding.

    He's definitely invited. Thanks for the advice:)
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  • AddieCakeAddieCake member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    No, do not bring it up.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • kimmiinthemittenkimmiinthemitten member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    Thanks all! Day and party came and went and it was never brought up. FI just wasn't sure if it was better to deliver what might be disappointing news to a good friend in advance or if it that would be rude because you're blatantly not asking him. He's going to follow your advice.
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  • thespeshulestsnowflakethespeshulestsnowflake member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    zitiqueen said:
    artbyallie said:
    Don't bring it up! If the friend says something about it, your FI can say, "Oh, Mike, Pete, and John are my groomsmen. I can't wait to party with you at the reception!" and change the subject. "Wow, did you see that tackle Another fucking holding penalty? Are you fucking kidding me?" This is, of course, assuming this friend will be invited to the wedding.
    She said they were watching the Lions, so I had to fix that for you.
    Sadly that fix is too true.
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  • kimmiinthemittenkimmiinthemitten member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    thespeshulestsnowflake said:
    zitiqueen said:
    artbyallie said:
    Don't bring it up! If the friend says something about it, your FI can say, "Oh, Mike, Pete, and John are my groomsmen. I can't wait to party with you at the reception!" and change the subject. "Wow, did you see that tackle Another fucking holding penalty? Are you fucking kidding me?" This is, of course, assuming this friend will be invited to the wedding.
    She said they were watching the Lions, so I had to fix that for you.
    Sadly that fix is too true.
    In addition to being a Lions season ticket holder, my fantasy team consists of Dez Bryant, Tony Romo and just about every other injured NFL player from the last two weeks so I'm failing in both real life and fantasy.  Wah wah!

    At least I'm not disappointing anyone about my WP though...silver lining;).
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