Wedding Customs & Traditions Forum

Too too...

I'll be 39 and FI will be 46 when we tie the knot next September. It's the first marriage for both of us but we  have been together for over a dozen years. We're not planning on having a bridal party, just my godson as a ring bearer and maybe a BM and MOH. Honestly, which traditions will bring on the eyerolls given our history and age. I already know I'm not doing the bouquet toss but what about the cake cutting, father/daughter dance, things like that. I know, it's our wedding and we can do whatever we want, but I would appreciate some input. 

Re: Too too...

  • climbingsingleclimbingsingle NYC 'burbs member
    Eighth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I was 34 on my wedding day and my husband was 41. It was my second wedding (had a typical large wedding ten years ago) and my husband's first.
    We didn't want a large bridal party. We had just a MOH and a BM.
    We skipped the bouquet/garter toss. We didn't cut the cake. Instead of spotlight dances, we both danced with our parents at the same time.

    But this is your wedding. Do what makes you happy! If you want to dance with you dad, do it. If someone eye rolls because you cut a cake, screw them.
    [Deleted User]db1984
  • I just got married at 39 & honestly I'm not sure where you're coming from regarding any eye-rolls over your age and history.  A wedding is something to celebrate and the way you celebrate it should be according to your preferences and not what other people think (as long as it's properly hosted, of course).  People should be happy you found someone you love, no matter how long your courtship.  I tossed my bouquet (which was excitedly caught by a 45 year old woman there with her boyfriend), had a huge WP (ages 25-40), cut the cake, did a father daughter dance (my dad would have been hurt had we not), etc.  I guess I honestly don't understand what age has to do with any of that?  If you don't want to do something, don't do it.  I skipped the garter belt thing b/c I think it's tacky and embarrassing...
    JediElizabethspockforprezInLoveInQueensMairePoppy
  • I think the 2 ladies before me have given wise answers.  Screw what makes anyone's eyes roll and do what is meaningful to you and your FI.
    onefootinthebayouJediElizabeth
  • A wedding requires a couple who is legally able to be married, a licensed officiant, a marriage license, and witnesses.  That is all.  Anything else - bridesmaids, cake cutting, dancing - is completely up to you.  If YOU want them, there is nothing silly about having them at your wedding.  Your age has nothing to do with anything.  You go, girl!
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  • kimmiinthemittenkimmiinthemitten Detroit, MI member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    You're 39 not 79!  I'll be 6 weeks shy of 37 when we get married and I fully intend on having a first dance with my husband and a special moment with my dad.  
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    onefootinthebayou
  • You're 39 not 79!  I'll be 6 weeks shy of 37 when we get married and I fully intend on having a first dance with my husband and a special moment with my dad.  
    If you're 79 and your dad is around - hell yeah, to the 'giving away' and the father-daughter dance'! 

    I don't think most people see these traditions in the light in which they were developed eons ago anymore - I think most people see them as special moments between two people, and if you view them in that light age most certainly does not matter - so OP go for whatever you want to do! Anyone who judges that will get an eye-roll from me, not the bride and groom.
    JediElizabethkimmiinthemittenChelleJaynedb1984
  • I don't understand why anyone would roll their eyes at you cutting a cake.  Or dancing with your father.  Or throwing a bouquet!  We didn't do the bouquet or garter toss only because we don't particularly like those traditions, and we didn't have a lot of single guests.  But it has nothing to do with age!  If YOU and YOUR FI like those traditions, do them!  And I say this as someone who married at 26 (I guess on the younger side?)

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    spockforprezMairePoppy
  • Maggie0829Maggie0829 Ravens & Bohs & Crabs & O's member
    Eighth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    I hate the bouquet and garter toss regardless of the age of the couple.

    I don't see why people would roll their eyes at you cutting the cake.  Typically the cake is always cut by those that it is for, for example if it was your birthday you would cut the cake, or if it was your retirement, graduation or bridal shower party, you would cut the cake first.

    I like when the couple dances with their respective parents.  You will always be their baby no matter how old you get so dance away!

    These traditions aren't typically seen as juvenile.  They are just special moments.

  • Thanks ladies. I guess I'm just overthinking things...as I tend to so in most situations:)  
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