Extended Cocktail Hour vs. Sit Down Dinner

Sandey

Anyone know what the general difference is price-wise? Thanks for any assistance...

alithebride

that would all depend on the place, the day, the length, what you serve and how many people.just make sure you have seats and tables for everyone for extended cocktail hour

Caitrus

An extended cocktail hour might not end up saving you any money. It really comes down to what you want to feed people. Say you want to do an extended cocktail hour around dinner time and you opt for a few stations, depending on the station you choose it could be similar to what a buffet dinner would cost. If you just wanted to do passed hors d'oeuvres for 3 hours, you don't want to have the same 6-10 items passed for that amount of time, it gets kind of boring. If you provide too little food, people will end up drinking more than they eat and will have to drive home a little tipsy. I come from the school of not everyone needs a seat for a cocktail hour, extended or not. That doesn't tend to go over well here but if you want people to mingle and you aren't really serving anything that people can't eat standing up and say you have dancing, you can't expect that people will sit all night long. I would say maybe look into couches or lounge furniture if you can afford it. Take a look at Taylor Creative or Cort For the people who think that everyone needs a seat, when you go to a bar or a club, not everyone has a seat and they seem to do okay. What is your motivation to do an extended cocktail hour? If it is financially motivated, what is it that you are comfortable spending per person on food and beverage?

t&j2008

Although we didn't really pursue the idea of an extended cocktail hour, we generally did not notice much of a difference pricewise at the places we looked at  that offered both.

Sandey

It really is all about trying to save money. The goal is to be able to invite as many people as we can but not "go on the cheap" in terms of the way we present the party. I'm finding the price is not all that different, myself, unfortunately. The big problem is we've got to have Kosher food. It's essential to my wonderful Sweetheart. In fairness, there are things that I find essential that he does not. Trying to keep to a budget of around $20K (and even that is killing me when we've got so many other things to spend money on right now).

Caitrus

20k for the entire wedding (dress, flowers, rentals, etc) or just 20k on food and beverage?  That said, what is your guest count up to?A couple of things to consider, there is usually a 35% of guest that don't/can't come.  And two, if money is tight, I think of all times, given today's economy that people will understand that you couldn't have a huge all out wedding.  Do what you can afford, do what you love and don't break the bank.  The number one cause of marital unbliss is due to finances.Where are you looking to have this wedding?  Maybe if your guest list isn't too big you can do it at a restaurant.  Former clients of mine we telling me about a place in Great Neck or around that area that does kosher catering, most of their business is Persian but it was super cheap.  The caterer that they were talking about which of course, I can't remember the name of works with one of the big synogogues there.  Maybe try giving some of the big synogogues around the Great Neck area a call and seeing who they reccomend.

Sandey

Yup. Whole shabang! Already have the dress, minimal on flowers (have a few really cool DYI ideas) and not sure what kind of rentals you're talking about except for a Chuppah and tuxes (if there are others, please let me know). Our wish list count is 250 invites. We know that's not realistic but I'd really love to be able to do up to 175 invites, figuring we'd have about 150. People will definitely understand (especially because of this weird thing people have about it "only" being a second wedding so we don't need to have a great party (which I'm still not completey understanding in that why is the second wedding less significant and less of a celebration than the first? I mean, I understand "who needs to be a princess twice? But I'm not sure why people think you woulnd't want to have just as lovely a party and just as many memories as the first time). Good idea re: calling one of hte synogogues. I'm kinda hoping I'll find someone with a favor that needs calling in or someone who knows someone who will be a good contact. But, short of that, I'll definitely do some calling around. Thanks. Are you a planner? You mentioned former clients gave you ideas...

saisongbird

For chuppahs, the less fancy you make it the cheaper it will be. Through florists and rabbis, I'm finding the cost is about $600. As for tuxes, I don't know how many groomsmen you have, but if four guys rent their tuxes at Men's Wearhouse, then the groom gets his for free.

Caitrus

Yes I am an event planner/wedding planner. I must say that 250 on a 20k budget is wildly ambitious. Look at this in perspective of actual numbers 20k/250, leaves you with 80/person.  That 80/person is not really a realistic number because you have to back out tax, gratuity, decorations, tuxes, etc. Go a step further, 4 drinks at a bar, is what 30-40 dollars depending on where you go.  People drink a lot more at weddings than they do at other events or bars for that matter. To give you an example of what I am spending my guest count is 94 with tax (8.625%) and gratuity (20%) the reception comes to approx 14k, linens are another 600 (I got a huge discount from a vendor that I work with) I ordered flowers from Costco - nothing over the top for 11 tables and that was around 800, the cake is about 400, dj is 1200, photographer, officiant, ceremony fee, etc.  And I already own a lot of things that I need, I am getting serious discounts from friends and people I have worked with and I am still coming in over 20k if you add in my dress.  The other thing not mentioned here is tipping people that is another thousand dollars or so.  Where are you thinking of having this reception?  Don't forget site fees.  If you do this in your backyard for example, not only do you have to rent tables, but you have to pay for the caterer to bring all of their kitchen equipment, delivery and it just keeps going.  I think your best bet if you will not consider trimming your guest list is to go to a restaurant and have a lunch reception. So realistically I think that you have about 30-40 dollars to spend per person.

eileen101010

A new trend is having a 4 hour cocktail party.

Sandey

Thank you all soooo much for your responses. We knew 200 people on our budget was COMPLETELY unrealistic. Trust me! It was purely a wish and a half. I found out it wasn't worth it to do the extended cocktail hour. I think we're about to book. My sweetheart is away this week and we have one or two other things to take a look at. Will keep you guys posted.