Jack & Jill Theme Ideas

[Deleted User]

Hello All!

FI & I are wanting to have a Jack & Jill style shower before our wedding. Yes, the kind where people buy tickets, and enter raffles, and spend money. They're very popular where we live so there's tons of places to host them, and people are generally more than willing to come (whether they're attending the wedding or not). 
We have quite a bit of time between then and now, but I'm wondering if anyone has any fun ideas for themes? 

He is from NC and I'm from CT/MA, so we played around with the "House Divided" theme for our favorite football teams (NFL and NCAA). I know casino theme is also really popular. And I saw these awesome centerpieces for a wedding that were goldfish bowls that I LOVED but they don't match our wedding theme. Do people generally have their J&J match the wedding theme or do something different? So many fun ideas to choose from, just wondering what other people have done that they enjoyed OR J&J they went to that had an awesome theme!

Side note: **Please don't comment if you're going to tell me that Jack & Jill's are tacky. Again, they're very common here so it's happening.... I'm just looking for theme ideas!**

Thanks!

CMGragain

...but, Jack and Jills ARE rude, tacky and horrible.  Just because you know other people who have done it, doesn't make it OK.  I know people who pick their noses in public.  That doesn't mean it is OK for me to do it.
Pay for your own wedding.  Don't ask anyone else to pay for it - especially your guests.

CMGragain

Knottie954741 said:

Hello All!

FI & I are wanting to have a Jack & Jill style shower before our wedding. Yes, the kind where people buy tickets, and enter raffles, and spend money. They're very popular where we live so there's tons of places to host them, and people are generally more than willing to come (whether they're attending the wedding or not). 
We have quite a bit of time between then and now, but I'm wondering if anyone has any fun ideas for themes? 

He is from NC and I'm from CT/MA, so we played around with the "House Divided" theme for our favorite football teams (NFL and NCAA). I know casino theme is also really popular. And I saw these awesome centerpieces for a wedding that were goldfish bowls that I LOVED but they don't match our wedding theme. Do people generally have their J&J match the wedding theme or do something different? So many fun ideas to choose from, just wondering what other people have done that they enjoyed OR J&J they went to that had an awesome theme!

Side note: **Please don't comment if you're going to tell me that Jack & Jill's are tacky. Again, they're very common here so it's happening.... I'm just looking for theme ideas!**

Thanks!

J.I.C.

Teddy917

You've already been given advice on the Jack and Jill being rude. So I'll give advice on the goldfish. Bad idea. What if one of them die? What if Uncle Joe gets drunk and decides to try swallowing one? What about if one of the kids decides to take it out of the bowl? Or someone runs into the table and breaks it? Plus goldfish need not lot more than just a bowl and food. They need to be kept at a constant temperature and water that has proper filtration and ph balance. This would be cruel to the fish. Living beings should not be used for decorations. What are you going to do with them after the party?

AddieCake

People are still doing fish centerpieces? WTF?

WinstonsGirl

AddieCake said:

People are still doing fish centerpieces? WTF?

I said similar on the other post.  That's a throwback to the good old days.  I feel so bad for the poor fishes, with loud noises, drunk people trying to eat them and getting left behind at the end of the night.  

OP - I don't respond well to being told what to do, so Jack and Jill's are rude and tacky.  But you already seem to know that.  I didn't have a J&J, nor a wedding theme, so I can't help you

photokitty

Did you really think that just bc you posted on a different board on the same website, you were suddenly going to get different responses??

Fundraising for your wedding is tacky and rude as hell! Just bc something is common, didn't mean it it's appropriate...look at how many women go out in opaque leggings and a short shirt. A j&j is way more offensive

TrixieJess

Knottie954741 said:

Hello All!

FI & I are wanting to have a Jack & Jill style shower before our wedding. Yes, the kind where people buy tickets, and enter raffles, and spend money. They're very popular where we live so there's tons of places to host them, and people are generally more than willing to come (whether they're attending the wedding or not). 
We have quite a bit of time between then and now, but I'm wondering if anyone has any fun ideas for themes? 

He is from NC and I'm from CT/MA, so we played around with the "House Divided" theme for our favorite football teams (NFL and NCAA). I know casino theme is also really popular. And I saw these awesome centerpieces for a wedding that were goldfish bowls that I LOVED but they don't match our wedding theme. Do people generally have their J&J match the wedding theme or do something different? So many fun ideas to choose from, just wondering what other people have done that they enjoyed OR J&J they went to that had an awesome theme!

Side note: **Please don't comment if you're going to tell me that Jack & Jill's are tacky. Again, they're very common here so it's happening.... I'm just looking for theme ideas!**

Thanks!

JIC

Already a DD in E.

TrixieJess

I posted my response in your other thread but, JIC. What you are proposing are very common here and I avoid them if I can. Thankfully all the weddings I've been a part of, the B&G thought they were incredibly tacky and didn't have them.

Just so you know, people will side-eye this and talk about it behind your back. I hear about how tacky these things are all the time from people.

If you cannot afford to pay for your own wedding, scale back.

redoryx

Knottie954741 said:

Hello All!

FI & I are wanting to have a Jack & Jill style shower before our wedding. Yes, the kind where people buy tickets, and enter raffles, and spend money. They're very popular where we live so there's tons of places to host them, and people are generally more than willing to come (whether they're attending the wedding or not). 
We have quite a bit of time between then and now, but I'm wondering if anyone has any fun ideas for themes? 

He is from NC and I'm from CT/MA, so we played around with the "House Divided" theme for our favorite football teams (NFL and NCAA). I know casino theme is also really popular. And I saw these awesome centerpieces for a wedding that were goldfish bowls that I LOVED but they don't match our wedding theme. Do people generally have their J&J match the wedding theme or do something different? So many fun ideas to choose from, just wondering what other people have done that they enjoyed OR J&J they went to that had an awesome theme!

Side note: **Please don't comment if you're going to tell me that Jack & Jill's are tacky. Again, they're very common here so it's happening.... I'm just looking for theme ideas!**

Thanks!

Please don't post if you're just going to tell us what we can and cannot say. Again, proper etiquette is very common on The Knot so it's happening. 

For realz, though. You posted on a public forum. We are allowed to comment and you don't get to dictate the terms of said comments. 

AddieCake

Listen, just because it's common for people to do in your area doesn't mean they should be doing it.

If you want theme ideas for a fundraiser for your wedding, you're going to have to ask the people who approve of it, like your friends and family and these other people in your area who have done it. Here, the majority of us think it's an awful practice, so you are not going to get ideas from us. If you get any, it will be from some one random lurker who pops out of the woodwork to support your idea and agree that everyone is being mean, and then we will likely never hear from her again. And neither of you will change anyone's minds. 

Seriously, let it sink in that you're sticking your hand out and asking people to pay for your party; do you do that in other areas of your life?  Do you hit your friends and family and strangers up for lunch money? No? Then why now? 

LondonLisa

A theme? How about 'begging chic' or 'rustic money grubbing'? Because you certainly aren't doing the proper party theme of 'pay for your own bloody wedding'.

banana468

Here in CT, I believe in raising funds for a local family with a little girl who is battling cancer for the third tine and who may not make it to her next birthday.

I don't consider a wedding to EVER be something that gets a fundraiser. Your desire to get married is not charity worthy.

Jen4948

How other people post isn't for you to decide.

That said, fundraising events for or at your wedding are tacky. And fish bowls, while pretty to look at, don't make good centerpieces.

I'm sorry if that isn't what you wanted to hear. But we're not here to validate bad ideas.

HID14118

What's happens to all the fish after the wedding?

jacques27

HID14118 said:

What's happens to all the fish after the wedding?

Who cares?

I mean, right?  The type of people who would use goldfish for a party prop sure don't give a crap.  Don't care that fish have to live in exact environments with water at proper PH balances.  That they are living beings that get distressed being moved around, having the glass tapped on, subjected to loud pounding music, potentially having things spilled in their bowls or the tables shaken.  Or that someone has to care for them after - just flush the f***ers.  They're just fish designed for our amusement.

There is just so much NOPE in this OP.  Grow up, pay for your own wedding, don't use living creatures as props.  Throwing a nice wedding where you don't treat your friends and family like crap and your own personal ATM isn't that hard.  Head on over to the budget board and we'll give you plenty of ideas on how to make that happen.

AddieCake

HID14118 said:

What's happens to all the fish after the wedding?

Guests take them home, of course! Everyone is just dying for the opportunity to take home a fish from a reception, dontchaknow?!

JoanE2012

Knottie954741 said:

Hello All!

FI & I are wanting to have a Jack & Jill style shower before our wedding. Yes, the kind where people buy tickets, and enter raffles, and spend money. They're very popular where we live so there's tons of places to host them, and people are generally more than willing to come (whether they're attending the wedding or not). 
We have quite a bit of time between then and now, but I'm wondering if anyone has any fun ideas for themes? 

He is from NC and I'm from CT/MA, so we played around with the "House Divided" theme for our favorite football teams (NFL and NCAA). I know casino theme is also really popular. And I saw these awesome centerpieces for a wedding that were goldfish bowls that I LOVED but they don't match our wedding theme. Do people generally have their J&J match the wedding theme or do something different? So many fun ideas to choose from, just wondering what other people have done that they enjoyed OR J&J they went to that had an awesome theme!

Side note: **Please don't comment if you're going to tell me that Jack & Jill's are tacky. Again, they're very common here so it's happening.... I'm just looking for theme ideas!**

Thanks!

This is an awful, tacky, rude idea.  Pay for your own damn wedding!  You're not a charity case.  Do you have a gofundme for your wedding too?

MyNameIsNot

I think troll.

I know there are disgusting, selfish, greedy people in the world, but this one is trying too hard to be as gross as possible.

glasgowtolondon

I can't wait for the obligatory honeyfund post that will no doubt be in this brides future.

randomslove

I'm sorry, but I would be really hurt and offended if I was 9invited to a party like this, but not to the wedding. I'd think my "friends" probably see me as a way to help them get cash, instead of as someone invaluable to them due to my friendship. If I was invited to the wedding, I would be offended that they didn't think whatever gift I chose to give them was enough. If people want to give you money, they will give you money. Don't worry. Just enjoy their company. If you want to earn extra money, get a job. Work more hours at the job you have. Sell thing you don't use. Make something or provide a service people want.

HID14118

AddieCake said:

HID14118 said:

What's happens to all the fish after the wedding?

Guests take them home, of course! Everyone is just dying for the opportunity to take home a fish from a reception, dontchaknow?!

Goldfish wedding favors! I can cross that off my list now. Thanks!

MairePoppy

Everybody mark bingo squares for 1. Fundraiser for a wedding, 2. Goldfish centerpieces and 3. Telling others how to post. 

I'm from MA and CT. This isn't commone practice where I live.  I've been solicted only once for one of these J and J fundraisers. The bride was my boss at the time. When I declined, the solitor explained to me that it was customary to purchase a ticket whether or not I planned on attending. When I brought a wrapped shower gift to work for the ticket seller to bring to the 'shower' for me, she told me they weren't wrapping the raffle prizes.

I'm surprised no one has mentioned that the Bride and Groom shoud never, ever plan their own shower. 

Goldfish in bowls are so passe. Kittens in fishbowls are tres chic.
 
 

JediElizabeth

MairePoppy said:

Everybody mark bingo squares for 1. Fundraiser for a wedding, 2. Goldfish centerpieces and 3. Telling others how to post. 

I'm from MA and CT. This isn't commone practice where I live.  I've been solicted only once for one of these J and J fundraisers. The bride was my boss at the time. When I declined, the solitor explained to me that it was customary to purchase a ticket whether or not I planned on attending. When I brought a wrapped shower gift to work for the ticket seller to bring to the 'shower' for me, she told me they weren't wrapping the raffle prizes.

I'm surprised no one has mentioned that the Bride and Groom shoud never, ever plan their own shower. 

Goldfish in bowls are so passe. Kittens in fishbowls are tres chic.
 
 

Anyone remember Bonsai Kittens? The most underrated favor idea of the late 90's.

MairePoppy

glasgowtolondon

Wasn't planning on doing favours but I might have to change my mind after seeing this!

levioosa

You can't tell me how to post and your idea is beyond tacky and incredibly rude.  

NowIAmSyp

MairePoppy said:

ok... a favor like that MIGHT just get me to actually attend one of those J & J sh*tshows